So I recently relocated to the top of this building that sits in the middle of a bunch of bars and restaurants, and so since I usually stay up very late, on the weekends between 2 and 5am I can see all these wasted people trying to get into cabs and locate their cars and occasionally vomit, fight, or otherwise make fools of themselves. It’s pretty funny stuff really.
One night I intervened on an apparent domestic violence incident where a guy and a girl were arguing and he was wasted and wouldn’t give her back her cell phone and after 10 minutes or so it began to escalate and I, just sitting in the darkness on the balcony just yelled, “hey man shit just give the bitch her phone back damn”. And then the situation diffused and I got a mild sense of satisfaction.
Then I saw some guys leave their friend asleep in the back of a truck parked across the street another night. 3 of them trying as hard as they could to get him into a car, but he wasn’t having it. Big motherfucker, swinging and flailing around resisting his friend’s attempts to take him home. Went ahead and just stretched out to take a nap in the back of some truck that wasn’t even owned by anyone in their party. The 3 guys drove off and left him there, but then a few minutes later arrived with 2 more guys and the 5 of them got him into a car and on his way.
Tonight, I go outside and there’s a guy stumbling hard and kind of leaning up against some cars one at a time. He sorta looks like he might be thinking of breaking into one, so my friend and I were watching, but then he just kinda fell backward onto the trunk of a car so my friend and I yelled out, “hey buddy how’s it lookin down there?” to which he replied a great deal of nonsense. We weren’t being dicks to him, just asking if he had a driver or if his friends were nearby, or if he was lost or whatever. I mean we’re yelling from a good way up and he’s down on the sidewalk so I dunno it is what it is and the next thing you know, the bastard is like banging on the door to the stairwell and insisting that we come down and fight him.
So the guy wasn’t a bummy dude he was actually just some kinda fresh outta college business student type. But he just kept talking about how he was gonna come up there and kick our asses, so I asked him what he would do if I came down there and sprayed him with mace, and I asked him what he’d do if I shot him with a rubber bullet. Then I explained to him that there are not very many apartments in this building, and that the entry codes to get in are very strict, and that I would not be able to help him to gain entry into the building. Then he babbled a bit and went away as some group of people passed by.
Yesterday, I was leaving and the fire department and an ambulance crew were outside the door just looking as confused as could be. I had to buzz them in. Then they had to leave, because they were at the wrong address. Crazy shit. The firemen can’t get in the building, and they can’t work a gps. I’m glad there’s a sprinkler system at least.