confessions of a troll

[gib]

As I enter into the middle years of my life, and my career as an amateur forum philosopher, I find myself slowly becoming a troll. But I'm not a grumpy old troll. I'm not even an antisocial troll. I'm sort of a troll's troll. That is to say, I find myself trolling the trolls... and I like it.

I find that trolls--the real ones--present themselves as an excellent opportunity for one to hone one's skills as a philosopher and a debater. They also present themselves as an excellent opportunity for exercising one's calm and composure in the face of what could otherwise become a cauldren of overboiled emotion and frustration. I find that if one simply doesn't care about making a point, about convincing one's interlocutor of any such point, then the rest is just fun and games... and practice. In fact, an entirely different challenge suddenly comes to the fore: how to drive one's interlocutor into a frenzy of outbursts and self-induced embarassment. After a while at it, it becomes easy... and fun.

But as I say, I've only practiced this (so far) against other trolls--the real ones--and I would never--because it's not worth it--practice this against someone whose philosophical mannerisms, style, and maturity I respect--principly because, well, I respect them. I find that nothing satisfies more than getting a clear picture of the other's point of view and coming to terms, with an attitude of respect for reason (a rare thing), with the other's differences of opinion. The only thing that's left to be desired in this process is how shortlived it is. You disagree, you figure out why you disagree, you mutually come to terms with it, and that's it! This is why I love trolling trolls--it could go on and on and on forever! This may sound like nothing more than headache-inducing tedium, but that's where the practice and skill come in--if you're good at it, it's a riot!

So wha'dya think? You hate me? You love me? You couldn't give crap?

...is there a troll inside you too?

[James L Walker]

*Yawns* So, did anybody catch today's episode of Jerry Springer?

[gib]

*Yawns* So, did anybody catch today's episode of Jerry Springer?

Troll! ...

[James L Walker]

*Yawns* So, did anybody catch today's episode of Jerry Springer?

Troll! ...

Sticks and stones....

[Contra-Nietzsche]

I think your a big old tit brain poo poo swallower who then poopes out his lactated poo poo and eats it again, over and over.

[FilmSnob]

lactated poo

lol



I think there are two sides that can evolve from an amateur philosophy forum poster.... If s/he's strong of mind: The troll's troll you describe. Substance is just another element of style and the mission is chess.

In a 180 degree angle, you have the people who have the same process of giving less and less shits, except this one figures out how to disable, bore or ignore trolls and dummies and only exchanges with others like him/her.

'Course, there is nothing to channel anger like trolling trolls effectively.

[Contra-Nietzsche]

I invented a new class of Troll, .The Troll Emperor of Doom'. It was on a psychology forum that was never moderated, and it kept getting hit by trolls, so I became the ultimate alter-ego any troll was attracted to, in reformating trolls while training up the forum- of highly diverse personas, in over comming any troll assault. It ended gloriously.... the owner of the sight looked at it after I quit the site for two months.... and closed it down as it wasn't as he expected it to be.... it became something much more aggressive and anarchic, and yet in control of clarity and capacity to project ideas. The users of the site later invited me to another site they made, and from there we went into much deeper analysis of psychology than we ever had before.... which lead me to meeting a few theory of mind philosophers. I still talk with few.... it's quite fun.

The worst troll is the one who cries troll. It screams a preconception of how conversations SHOULD GO, and is a means of control and forceful convolution of the natural scope the discussion would go in the first place. Most important question to ask about a troll in your own mind is the motivations for trolling in the first place, and treat that as their synthesis and their question. The answer always predates the question- it's the supposition of a logistic, linear contradiction over and imposed upon the answer-question synthesis that we stumble on. It's up to the philosopher to come to terms with this, and find the root of the paradox. Speech can't exist without this seemingly impossible inversion of logic, but a answer can't long suffice under scrutiny unless if faces up to this. A troll essentially ceases to be a troll under such circumstances. But we find a whole lot of other people suddenly becomes increasingly trollish as a result. Thus one enters into a very creepy disutopia of the beautiful means as a basis to rationality. It's all fubar when grasped at it's crux from the viewpoint of their understanding. Never trust a anti-troller. People who cry 'you're the worst troll' are indeed the worst troll in themselves. The point they need to drawl the line at is:

and I do encourage them to draw it deep.... perferably in a spot with a drain that won't stain. World can do with less crytic-trolls crying that everyone isn't abiding by their own narrow world view..... one when the psychological roots of such a outlook is investigated can be found the personality type that was center stage to most every tragedy and massacre in history. They're sick in the head, and just need to open up, broaden their horizons, or get out of the way. Quit trying to hurt others in your self righteousness and tyrannically enforce equanimity. Inner peace is fine all fine and dandy, but not when it's achieved by enslaving others to silence them. Only thing worst is a femme-nazis or other similar kind of highly partisan pusher of their values and outlook. Not as evil as this main kind of troll, but still pretty fucked up in the head.

[gib]

I think your a big old tit brain poo poo swallower who then poopes out his lactated poo poo and eats it again, over and over.

Yeah, yeah, but come on.

Most important question to ask about a troll in your own mind is the motivations for trolling in the first place, and treat that as their synthesis and their question.

I think it's very rare to find a troll that has absolutely nothing to say and trolls strictly for the purpose of trolling.

What is a troll? A troll is an ugly old creature who lives under a bridge because nobody likes him and so he doesn't like anybody else. If the troll happens to be a human being who frequents internet forums (because that's the only channel he can regain is lost social contact and actually communicate his unpopular views), you'll find that his style is often an agonized mix of expressing his tortured views and his desire to vent against the world because of all his hang-ups. Often, the latter eclipses the former, and he ends up just playing the devil's advocate (going to rediculous extremes) simply because it makes him feel good to be antagonistic, but if one digs into his points and stays with him long enough, one finds him defending the twisted and flaky views that brought him to the internet forum to begin with.

[xzc]

There's only two people here who know what a troll is; coincidentally, they're also the only two trolls on the board.

[PavlovianModel146]

So wha'dya think? You hate me? You love me? You couldn't give crap?

...is there a troll inside you too?

I certainly wouldn't go as far as to say I love you, but I think you're a riot. In a subtle way, at that.

[Calrid]

I troll trolls but if you want to really get some practice I recommend 4 chan or talk rational. They hunt in packs there, so the lone troll hunter needs to be well versed in the kung fu.

Trolling trolls is trolling, make no bones about it, the only thing that redeems it is it's funny to non trolls. Luckily because they hunt like frotting bonobos on acid, they are very easy to troll. You just have to be patient.

I remember I started a mafia peanut gallery thread just to troll one troll, he posted 6 times in one minute, calling me all the names under the sun, and this was a self styled troll expert, he only spoke in 1337 and txt and everything. Real childish ass, but soooo funny.

some tips

1) trolls are very meme orientated, for example there is a meme about getting people to melt down, so a no brainer is to pretend to melt down to sucker in trolls then watch them look dumb.
2) always lie
3) Claim you are the best troll in the universe or some puppet master, this annoys trolls no end because every idiot thinks they are the next Kwizats Hadderak of buffoonery.
4) claim you are a god, trolls are narcissistic personality disorder in general, which means they have deep seated insecurities that make them lash out at people they think are stronger than them. So make outrageous claims about yourself, it's like catnip to them
5) use very, very old memes like they are the next big thing, Trolls like to think they are cutting edge on the meme thing so anything from demotivators (so 5 years ago) or old I hazcheeseburger stuff drives them nuts.
6) when a troll follows you around and they inevitably will once you have baited them, claim you are the greatest living troll again, and that every day you are pulling these idiots strings. Repetition is a weapon trolls use, but they seem barely able to take it. For example trolls like using phrases deliberately to annoy over and over again e.g. you mad bro? Yeah your mad bro? And smillies that do the same. So just do it back until they either get mad or bored.
7) Once you have melted down come back, the no lose troll board of rules says that first you get trolled, then you roll with the punches, pretend you were playing along, then you rant, then you melt down, or something like that, it's been a while. So do the opposite ie meltdown, come back, rant, roll with the punches, then tell them they just got trolled. This will fucking drive them livid, it's so funny.
The bad troll, nothing annoys a troll more than someone who is just really bad at trolling, start a thread called trolling trolls. Mistake 1 don't let on you are trolling, plausible deniability. Get angry (or at least pretend to get angry) anger is like rocket fuel to trolls.
9) rinse and repeat, get creative, sooner or later a troll will let on what really annoys them, if it's you job done. By which I mean use any weapons the idiots give you against them. Get good at fixing on their buttons.
10) never ever actually get angry, stop posting if you are not pretending to rant.

"memes" I have invented: the psychiatrist, ie claim someone has certain personality disorders and then just psychoanalyse them until they tell you to STFU so many times it's funny, and as already mentioned the puppet master and god complex, your mum (AKA the old meme ressurection) meme.

It's been a while since I fucked with the idiot patrols, but I have fond memories of it.

You aren't a troll unless you have been banned from every low or no moderation site there is for trolling trolls. It's sometimes hard, but I once got banned permanently from a site after being warned to stop making death threats to trolls and moderators, who were much the same thing. I got a user title banned for death threats, this is like the VC for troll hunters I think. They knew I was joking as I had been doing it for ages, but they were extremely ban phobic, so I had to go overboard and threaten to kill them with extreme prejudice.

AAMOI, apart from spam bots I was the first person to be permabanned for like 4 years.

[Calrid]

There's only two people here who know what a troll is; coincidentally, they're also the only two trolls on the board.

And they are?

[Moreno]

...is there a troll inside you too?

Sure, and I think a lot of trolls, especially on philosophy type forums might describe their motives similarly, but have decided that the 'community' as a whole is a bunch of trolls. The forum as a whole just wanks on about a bunchy of trivial stuff. Or they do not recognize truly _______________(fillin the nice adjective) philosophy. So I am not sure the motivation is unique and separates you from other trolls. Your discrimination or manner might. Or what % of the potential audience might be trolls.

Frankly I think a lot of 'normal' posting is trollish. There are so many ways to get over the idea that the other person must be an idiot. In fact one of the best ways to troll is to not quite respond to another person's posts while seeming to and while implying or stating that the other person's points were not good or well supported. I find that much worse then any formal troll's posts could ever be. (and of course I have likely done this myself, though I do think there are degrees of this and intelligence is not a filter. IOw some very intelligent (seeming?) people manage to not quite respond for months on a single thread or threads in general.

Someone popping in an defecating a zinger is so much easier to ignore or deal with.

[Calrid]

...is there a troll inside you too?

Sure, and I think a lot of trolls, especially on philosophy type forums might describe their motives similarly, but have decided that the 'community' as a whole is a bunch of trolls. The forum as a whole just wanks on about a bunchy of trivial stuff. Or they do not recognize truly _______________(fillin the nice adjective) philosophy. So I am not sure the motivation is unique and separates you from other trolls. Your discrimination or manner might. Or what % of the potential audience might be trolls.

Frankly I think a lot of 'normal' posting is trollish. There are so many ways to get over the idea that the other person must be an idiot. In fact one of the best ways to troll is to not quite respond to another person's posts while seeming to and while implying or stating that the other person's points were not good or well supported. I find that much worse then any formal troll's posts could ever be. (and of course I have likely done this myself, though I do think there are degrees of this and intelligence is not a filter. IOw some very intelligent (seeming?) people manage to not quite respond for months on a single thread or threads in general.

Someone popping in an defecating a zinger is so much easier to ignore or deal with.

This forum is very troll free. I personally don't see a lot of it in comparison to sites like the old Richard Dawkins Forums where creationist trolls were on every thread about anything. That's why I post here regularly, it's free of idiots for the most part.

Just to add, save editing the last post again:

untab

http://www.freethought-forum.com/forum/showpost.php?p=967966&postcount=15

God I'm good.

[Ierrellus]

Gib,
Why waste your time swatting flies? They just eat shit and die.

[Calrid]

Gib,
Why waste your time swatting flies? They just eat shit and die.

Because it's funny. And just ignoring trolls doesn't work as well. Humiliating them at least makes them see that they are stupid.

[gib]

Gib,
Why waste your time swatting flies? They just eat shit and die.

I'll tell you why. Once in a while, when I'm bored, I come on to these forums to get some kind of stimulation. Half the time I fail because it's the same old bull shit over and over again, and I could slide into a discussion offering my two cents, but usually I end up foreseeing exactly where the discussion will lead (as I've been through the loops many-a-times) and I lose the motivation to post.

Sometimes, however, I catch a relatively short OP that's worth my time reading through, and I find (once read) that the point is bizzare, controversial, or plane unsupported (usually a combination thereof), and even though I usually don't have a strong opinion one way or the other on the topic, I can get my stimulation fix by going through the OP, point by point, and commenting on the flawed logic (or what I see as flawed) or just giving my reaction to the points being made. If I'm not completely ignored, this typically gets the ball rolling and we each start trolling each other.

I know, I know, not as good or as stimulating as a serious philosophical discussion between rational and mature (maturity is key) grown ups, but when the discussion board is desperately dry of juicy content, trolling is the next best thing.

[Calrid]

Gib,
Why waste your time swatting flies? They just eat shit and die.

I'll tell you why. Once in a while, when I'm bored, I come on to these forums to get some kind of stimulation. Half the time I fail because it's the same old bull shit over and over again, and I could slide into a discussion offering my two cents, but usually I end up foreseeing exactly where the discussion will lead (as I've been through the loops many-a-times) and I lose the motivation to post.

Sometimes, however, I catch a relatively short OP that's worth my time reading through, and I find (once read) that the point is bizzare, controversial, or plane unsupported (usually a combination thereof), and even though I usually don't have a strong opinion one way or the other on the topic, I can get my stimulation fix by going through the OP, point by point, and commenting on the flawed logic (or what I see as flawed) or just giving my reaction to the points being made. If I'm not completely ignored, this typically gets the ball rolling and we each start trolling each other.

I know, I know, not as good or as stimulating as a serious philosophical discussion between rational and mature (maturity is key) grown ups, but when the discussion board is desperately dry of juicy content, trolling is the next best thing.

QFT.

If only being over 40 meant you were mature, trust me some of the worst trolls I have ever met have been in their latter days and all the more incorrigible because of it. They would quite happily bring down a forum with no concern because they liked their hobby. Take Rants and Raves it died because there were more trolls than people who wanted an actual discussion. Now they moved onto another forum, and you can tell them not to ruin it 'til you are blue in the face but they will anyway, there is no reasoning with trolls they have no soul, like gingers.

[gib]

If only being over 40 meant you were mature, trust me some of the worst trolls I have ever met have been in their latter days and all the more incorrigible because of it.

This is exactly how I imagine trolls. Old and grumpy. Miserable at the world because they have not, after a lifetime of trying, convinced the world of their "genius". I bet they see themselves as Schopenhauer.

[Calrid]

If only being over 40 meant you were mature, trust me some of the worst trolls I have ever met have been in their latter days and all the more incorrigible because of it.

This is exactly how I imagine trolls. Old and grumpy. Miserable at the world because they have not, after a lifetime of trying, convinced the world of their "genius". I bet they see themselves as Schopenhauer.

It's worse than that they see themselves as mattering, despite all evidence to the contrary. These people think they are providing a service to the web, that somehow we need to be toughened up. These people sadly need to get toughened up, because their character flaws make them far too easy to troll. If they're making the web troll proof, why the hell are they so easy to troll?

Tell you what I should get back to doing it, but I have better things to do with my time, unlike them.

[James L Walker]

Blah,blah,blah,blah.....

[Calrid]

Blah,blah,blah,blah.....

Tl;dr.

You mad bro?

[xzc]

Sophists were the first trolls. A necessary characteristic for a troll is not taking yourself srsly, i.e., having a light spirit. Socrates was a sophist, though unlike other sophists he didn't troll for fame or money, so maybe it's not right to call him a sophist. He was a resentful guy underneath it all, and used his hyper-rationality to troll Athenians, though he did it under the pretense of mid-wifering some truths out of some srs but noble men. After a while Athens got fed up and banned him for trolling. Sort of what happened with Dunamis way back. Anyway, maybe Socrates wasn't an ideal troll, what with the heaviness of his spirit, but he was definitely very much alike to internet trolls precisely in that respect.

[James L Walker]

Sophists were the first trolls. A necessary characteristic for a troll is not taking yourself srsly, i.e., having a light spirit. Socrates was a sophist, though unlike other sophists he didn't troll for fame or money, so maybe it's not right to call him a sophist. He was a resentful guy underneath it all, and used his hyper-rationality to troll Athenians, though he did it under the pretense of mid-wifering some truths out of some srs but noble men. After a while Athens got fed up and banned him for trolling. Sort of what happened with Dunamis way back. Anyway, maybe Socrates wasn't an ideal troll, what with the heaviness of his spirit, but he was definitely very much alike to internet trolls precisely in that respect.

Socrates is what fucked up this world.

I think Diogenes should of whipped his ass in a duel to the death. *fantasizes*

[Ierrellus]

You cannot humiliate a troll. Given the nature of logic, a troll can rationalize to the death of any argument. Hey, guys, I'm old and not grumpy or believing I'm Schopenhauer.