Aesop was fucking Hilarious

I swear to god he would write some of those fables not giving a shit. I mean, it’s some of the best storytelling I’ve ever read.

The King’s Son and the Painted Lion

Some king must have been like; “Write these fables for my children,” and he’s just “lol ok” and he writes this bullshit.

The Mule

This reminds me of trust-fund babies who don’t do anything. But I almost feel like this is just a bad joke. He just pumped out these Fables. Like, the plot graph of this story would be something like y=x. Because it eternally kicks ass. The mule just said two things to himself and called it a moral. I mean, there was a moral, but I would love to talk to Aesop about how much he bullshitted some of these stories.

The Mischievous Dog

This dog was a dumbass. I imagined Kurt Cobain for some reason. “Fuck all of you/listen to my (shitty) music.” I also realized that Aesop sucked at storytelling:

Aesop seems like a cynic, but he’s too much of a pussy. He got that people sucked, but he wanted to give people nice morals and shit. It makes you a way better cynic if you keep those morals to yourself and patronize everyone with their lack of those morals. Benefiting a dumb society doesn’t get you anywhere. It probably won’t get them anywhere either. [-(