K: Why would I attend a Clinton rally? I have no desire or money to go to
a rally… come to think of it, I have never been to a rally in my life including
high school…Why would anyone in their right mind go to rally?
Um…I’m always honest. Like I wonder if it’s really moral indignation that prevents you from exploiting the economy for your own gain, or if it’s just a lack of discipline. You trying to tell me that your sense of right and wrong is more important to you than money?
Like on memorial day, I decided to go to this place where you can rent a tube and float down a river, and on holidays there’s usually a bunch of hos there from the nearby universities, drunk, half or more naked and floating down the same river. There could be like several hundred people in a day go down this thing. So I take my friend who’s basically a real life version of Quagmire from family guy, and then these 2 girls, naturally show themselves to be the attention seekers because they’re wearing makeup, screaming and giggling because as they claimed, they believed a turtle to be underneath them swimming and they were acting like they thought they might get bitten, so that they could keep squealing and getting people to look at them. So then, right when everyone looks, my friend yells out, “The turtles like the way it smells”. Let me tell you something man, everyone got quiet. Even the birds stopped chirping. It was a dead silence with like 20 or so people all right there in the spot where we were. So the girl’s friend, the other girl says, “who said that? eww!”. Then I just pointed directly at my friend and said it was him.
See how funny that is? Because it’s true. Motherfuckers on rivers telling girls that turtles like the smell of thier pussies. That shit really happens.