I have depression/ocd and have important questions

These questions I am about to ask are for a neuroscientist to answer. They are very important questions. I will give a brief explanation of my situation. I have had severe depression in my life and have had horrible indescribable depressive nightmares.

In these nightmares, I experienced radically altered mental states. They are nothing normal and are the worst hellish experiences. They are experiences that cannot be explained since they are unlike any other experience.

They are mental states that can never be experienced in one’s normal waking life since mental states in dreams and nightmares are radically different than mental states in your normal waking life.

Now near death experiences are not like dreams. They are actually conscious states greater than normal waking consciousness since people who have them report that everything was more real than real. They also contain elements unlike dreams.

However, even though near death experiences are not like dreams, they may contain some elements of dreams since some of the neurological processes that are involved in dreaming can also be involved in near death experiences.

So now, I am going to ask two questions here. Please write down your answers to them and explain your answers in detail rather than a simple “yes” or “no:”

1.) If I ever have a near death experience myself someday, then there is the possibility that it could be a hellish one since some ndes are hellish. They are not as numerous as the blissful heavenly ndes, but they do exist which means there is always the possibility that I could have a hellish nde.

So the question I have here is, if I do ever have a hellish nde someday, then is it even possible for me to experience those radically altered hellish mental states during the nde? If not, then what about mental states that are similiar?

When I say similiar, I do not mean a hellish mental state that one would experience here in his/her normal waking life. What I mean is a hellish mental state similar to those I’ve experienced in those nightmares I’ve had.

As I’ve mentioned before, elements of dreams and nightmares can be involved in ndes. So I am wondering if those hellish radically altered mental states I’ve experienced in my nightmares can be one of those elements. Or if this is an element only exclusive to the nightmares I’ve had.

If it is not possible for me to experience those altered mental states during an nde, then I won’t be worried. But if it is possible, then I will be very worried since to experience this fully conscious would be the absolute worst thing.

2.) In my waking state, I am in a normal state of mind. I experienced horrible indescribable depressive feelings in my nightmares unlike any other experience in my waking life. It was the worst experience in my nightmares.

But for whatever reason, when that feeling lingered on in my waking life, it wasn’t as bad. It was a very horrible feeling, but that is all it was and it wasn’t as bad of an experience as my nightmares for whatever reason.

Perhaps being in this normal wakeful state of mind gives me power and resistance to those feelings. But in my nightmares, I am no longer in that normal wakeful state of mind. So maybe this is why the feelings are worse experiences in my nightmares than my waking life.

But this is all regarding the feelings. I am not sure about those radically altered hellish states of mind I’ve experienced in my nightmares. If I were to experience those in my waking life, then it could be an even worse experience than my nightmares. I am not sure on this one.

I can’t imagine what that experience would even be like in my waking life. Would I have power and resistance to it like I did with those feelings, or would it be just as bad or an even worse experience than what I’ve experienced in my nightmares?

Considering that it is possible for me to experience those altered mental states when I am fully conscious during an nde, then if I were to have power and resistance to it like I did with those feelings, then I won’t be very worried. But if I don’t and it would be an even worse experience than my nightmares, then I would be very worried.

My life is a living hell, so if anything, nightmares are a release and entertainment for me.

What about your nightmares is worse than mine.

We are in control of our minds during our waking hours, but we are not during sleep, so night time to you brings with it a fear. Have you tried sleeping with a dim lamp on when going to bed?

Have you not got used to the situation with time? as that seems to be your only option right now… that, and to invest in a dreamcatcher… and preferably one you are drawn to by colour, design and size.

So will I have this sense of control if I ever do experience those radically altered hellish mental states during an nde? I would be fully conscious during an nde, so should I have power over those experiences? Or would it be just as bad or even worse of an experience than my nightmares? Those two questions I asked didn’t really get answered.

I can only say that at least you would have prepared yourself for it, but why do you think you will have an nde? are you expecting one?

Get used to the current situation, minimise the trauma it currently causes you, and imagine the scenario you fear is actually happening and see how you feel.

I ask this just in case I do ever have one someday. I have a heart problem and one could happen to me someday. But as for those questions I’ve asked, I will wait for someone else to respond to them. Someone who knows a lot about the brain and consciousness.

I had an NDE. My body was paralyzed could not move.

And my brain felt numb and cold.

It wasn’t pleasant.

Perhaps contact a research team at a hospital or university. I know that nde is being looked into, but last I heard… current science does not allow for much understanding of the mind.

Though wouldn’t the mind be too involved in ‘the moment’ to go into nightmare mode… this is the case during anxiety attacks and heart attacks. Where do you purport you will have time for a nightmare?

Good luck in easing your mind on this.

A starter for 10: google.co.uk/search?q=near+ … ent=safari

If I had the choice to either experience the worst possible physical pain such as having my torso ripped apart or to instead experience those horrible altered mental states from my depressive nightmares during a near death experience, I think I just might choose to have my torso ripped.

Those horrible altered mental states are not the experience of me screaming in pain and agony. It is a completely different experience than that. It is an experience far worse than that. I would not describe this experience as pain. There is no way to describe this experience. It is the most horrible experience.

So to try and help me not be worried about this thought would be no different than trying to make me not worried about the possibility that I could have my torso ripped apart (if there was the likely possibility that could happen to me). There is no way I can be at peace with such a notion and nor is there any way I can not worry about such a thing.

neurotalk.org/archive/index.php/t-3774.html

m.youtube.com/watch?v=82oIHBGDoiI

You have a dopamine imbalance, usually low, but in this dream state quite high. You need to learn how to control the indirect path through lucid dreaming.

I gave Trixie the method a while back that has cultural associations with the symbolism of elation and depression, but couldn’t state it at the time least it failed in unconscious effect in breaking out of his bad dreams.

viewtopic.php?f=4&t=189971&p=2592453&hilit=Trixie+wheel+fire#p2592453

All the signs and signals relate to wheels (such as torture wheels, wheels of fortune, such as Boethius in “Consolations of Philosophy”, Ying-Yang, Wheel of Time) and the falling effect in dreams associated in Near Death Experiences, and mixture of Fire and Water… The Water of Life and Hellish Waters.

Point was to insert a unconscious script that would trigger a unconscious feedback loop while he was dreaming, so he could disentangle himself from the exhausting effects of OCD sleeping, his past mentions and his fetish obsession suggests he has latent aspects he has yet to learn to control, though I have no doubt he has some experience with Lucid dreaming.

Alot of the fear state of the mind is generated when the mind becomes aware of Sleep Paralysis, and struggles against it. Failure fan be exhausting and hellish, and we will often times interpreted it as a life and death struggle, projecting images of death, torture, bring devoured, raped, by absurdities. It can be emotionally stressing.

If you can’t trigger the Pre-Motor Cortex in “deciding what to do”, as I gave Trixie the gleeful option of doing, he wasn’t scared in the thread to climb up of his own volition and go again for another try, testing variables, the very essence of lucid control in scenario, you have to rely on blunt, instinctive anger. Lash out physically, try to kill what is killing you, screaming like a little hissy… you will awake making a muffled yelling house, closer to a yawn, stabbing at your assailant, in the waking state just moving your arm up a little.

Some people have very little restriction when they sleep, and have been known to attack their spouses when they sleep, requiring anti-psychotics to dumb their minds down.

You also may experience split consciousness here, a dream within a dream, both seen from one vantage point.

I recommend looking over my Wheels of Atlantis thread from my childhood, a example of lucid control in modulating the direct and indirect paths. I was struggling to induce my inhibitory pathway as a small child, a toddler, and triggered nightmarish repetition in active imagination, but was unable to break it.

mentalsymmetry.com/forum/?pa … -atlantis/

Try lucid dreaming first, if that doesn’t work, kill the fucking thing. If it is a falling dream, do a Parachute Landing Fall, try to dream past your death. Insist on continuing dreaming.

And yes, anything your mind experiences in a dream state emotionally can happen on a visceral level. Getting shot at and bleeding out, bring eaten and tortured, while your dream state likely merely alluded to the pain, the fear and terror are very much a real possibility. It is part of the human condition, has a role unexpectingly in keeping us alive, or encouraging those around us to move off in a panic and living. Imagine getting stuck in rubble in a earthquake, claustrophobia is quite understandable… wiggling around quite dangerous. Sometimes going nuts in a cave in gets you out, other times it fucks you worst. People dig, looking for survivors. Your instincts may keep you alive, but much depends on your interpretation and reading of a situation.

Thalamus supposedly controls fear (so say the Navy Seals) but I haven’t seen much evidence of this, but can be wrong. It sits at the end of these sequences… Fear though, can break out of these scary situations. The whole point of Seal training in the pool stage is to literally drown recruits, conducting tasks, seeing if they can repress fear. This won’t let you out of a nightmare though, using anger. Only a subset if the population can do that (I believe Sauwelios would be the best candidate, respite the fact he is the mist fearful on these forums), as INTPs are based in that region, as a INTJ I’m in the direct path, I have both Ideo-Kenetic Apraxia and OCD dreaming, fucking lucky me. Makes me a excellent philosopher, but I never know what to expect come dreamfall.

And no, dreaming isn’t like being awake, but every element of a dream environment is present while being awake, our ability to make judgment is greatly descended, if you wake for even a second, what made sense in a dream comes off instantly as bulkshit, just not reasonable. Why? Memory access in dreams differ than while awake. I have memories that recure in dreams, remembering past dreams from decades ago, that die off being remembered very soon upon waking, but I always recognize them while dreaming. That is the only big difference, the rest if it is just a restricted consciousness, once you wake, more of you is together, functioning more clear headed. Your senses have a more direct impact.

Now I gotta deal with the repercussions of Trixie discovering I was programming him with lucid dreaming techniques to break out of his bad dreaming spells. It won’t work on Ecmandu, he is a schizophrenic, the first link touches upon why, but not in depth. People withnPatkindons and Schizophrenics make up a sizeable portion of the study population, I’ve tested his capacity to reason absurdities repeatedly on this forum, many are stored in the hidden section of the site because the moderation failed to grasp what I was doing, and couldn’t state it without spoiling the effects, letting him know what I was doing. I went through the sequencing of his lucid dreaming, active imagination alternative worlds where he is a Creator and Savor in Hell (see Trixie’s fiery water torture thread for comparison), he couldn’t explain absurd coincidences, so his Orient-Observe Cycle in his dreams are severely diminished. I have no doubt he has had some hellish experiences, his Messiah Complex is likely just a coping mechanism, the indirect pathway does trigger compassion, but not egoism. Dispite his inability to judge and be aware of absurdities, he does show a remarkable resilancy in countering the effects, though it causes him to come off more looney than he otherwise would be if he was just stuck in a internal hell. When he reads this, he will make all sorts of statements, it is expected.

I like my Brussel Sprouts = Head of Lettuce connection. I don’t know how far comedy can be taken to treat Schitzophenia though, they are very limited in their ability to make new connections, so absurd things seem normal, like in Alice in Wonderland (I’m still the Cheshire Cat Harbal), minus Alice’s shock, just accepting it all.

viewtopic.php?f=6&t=191032

Also, if any reader is from Micronesia, don’t follow my suggestions above, there is something different about how you deal with Sleep Paralysis, it causes death when you see the Succubus, and I don’t know why. I know your online looking for solutions, but this isn’t the place you will find it. I suggest just try avoiding sleep, forever.