A lesson in logic

as seen in MAGNILOQUENCE, July 2005 issue…


(A) The number of doctors in the U.S. is 700,000
(B) Accidental deaths caused by physicians per year are 120,000
(C) Accidental deaths per physician is 17.14%
Statistics courtesy of the U.S. Dep. of Health & Human Services


(A) The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000 (yes, that’s 80 million)
(B) The number of accidential gun deaths per year, for all age groups is 1,500
(C) The number of accidential deaths per gun owner is 0.001875%
statistics courtesy of the FBI

So, statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners.

Remember, guns don’t kill people, doctors do.


Please alert your friends to this alarming threat. We must completely ban doctors before this gets completely out of hand.

Out of concern for the public at large, I have withheld statistics on lawyers for fear the shock would cause people to panic and seek medical attention.


What counts as an accidental gun death?

lack of intention


which is why i go naturopathy myself. it is just simply a more natural way to health. because it is based on good foods,organics it has helped me alot. get me away from non-living, toxic drugs.


Did they define accidental death as caused by physicians?


yes, the doctors caused the accidental deaths…


In other words, they provided no criteria for what was judged accidental. There might be a bit of difference between preventable and accidental, but it wouldn’t make the ‘statistic’ quite as spectacular. Got it. Another fine piece of media reporting…


she has a point impy.

the lesson in logic is, do not equivocate.

avoidable is one thing. accidental is another.

here’s to a good spanking for imp, cause it’s one of the few times he fucked up.



this is an exersize in becoming aware of logical and statistical problems…

I thought “We must completely ban doctors” was simply too funny to be taken seriously…

nonetheless… watch future reporting about “health” foods very carefully… and pay attention to the “factual and scientific” reporting on global warming…


Logically, yes, without clearer definitions you’ve reached a satisfactory conclusion.

However, you have to take into consideration that people do not typically go and seek out a physician (or doctor?) unless they’ve already sustained some sort of life-threatening (or at the very least endangering) injury or wound. So what it takes to accidentally kill a patient is significantly less than what, perhaps, it takes to accidentally kill a healthy individual with a firearm.

84% of philosophers possess the technical vocabulary and are compelled to employ it through systematic approaches to at least 95% of statements. Therefore only 16% of philosophers have a greater than 5% chance of getting a joke.



too clever by half…


Imp, I agree with the others’ comments: We all need doctors—there are 250+ millions potential american patients (US stats)—so, naturally doctors would have to have contact with a lot more people whose misfortunes range from cancer, to complicated childbirth, to victim of drowning, to vehicular accidents. Compare that with gun owners whose gun owning does not necessarily mean “more contacts with people” who could be their victims of accidental shooting. For one, people don’t go to consult a gun owner for life threatening disease. Heck, gun owners don’t even go around offering their gun owning practice to just about anyone.

So, at first look, one might infer what you said, but really if you look carefully, there is a reasoning behind the numbers.

so, maybe you can revise your numbers by comparing instead the number of people each doctor and each gun owner gets in contact with directly that would have a significant connection with their (eventual) deaths.

You’d think that naturally a lot of people would die due to accidental shooting simply due to the sheer number of people who own guns, but it doesn’t seem to be the case.

Shit happens. One in the eye for the existentialists.

On the contrary, the sheer number of gun owners would suggest that there should be a lot of people dying due to accidental gunshots.

Or just increase the number of doctors and see the population shrink, getting rid of (for the most part) those pesky poor people everyone in America is always going on about. No-one seems to have a good word to say for them. Either they are weak and pathetic and don’t deserve any help, or they are weak and pathetic and deserve lots of help.

:unamused: :unamused:

Too late for us, Someone.

Either we are good at not getting the joke, or we like to go off-topic.

And since philosophy is mostly in the business of beating around the bush, sarcasm, and again, not getting the joke, isn’t any wonder we found each other here?


  1. Millions of people vote Republican
  2. People who vote Republican will eventually die.
  3. The percentage of Republican voters that will eventually die is 100%

Voting Republican is more lethal than visiting a gun toting doctor!

It’s not a logical argument unless there’s an inferential relationship between the premises and conclusion. For example, doctors treat human beings… human beings are mortal, thus the percentage of people who die proceeding a visit to a doctor/physician is 100%.

Republicans vote for agents to enact legislation that will impact the voters’ very own lives. Lives that will all eventually end in DEATH! MUHAHAHA

Thank you and good night.

Just food for thought. How many of those “accidental deaths” caused by physicians were originally there for bullet wounds?