I do not trust the God of christ, or christ itself.
Despite this, I have been having some dreams about the christian divinities.
There is a certain experience which is associated with the christian divinites.
Viparinama-dukkhata is the best word I have to describe this, and it is a buddhist concept.
The contrast between ourselves and the divine is so great, that we feel an overwhelming negativity that we have become accustomed to, during the state of being exposed to the divine. The pain that we have been feeling unconsciously becomes conscious during exposure to these divinities, leading to overwhelming blindness and pain as we are at the edges of the holy spirit’s true nature. We have been living with this pain and blindness for so long that it is normal for us and we grow to be accustomed to it, unconsciously accepting it and all of its consequences. At the edges of heaven is a place where extreme badness can be seen due to contrast, whereas it is invisible in other places, due to lack of contrast.
Meanwhile I would conclude that a true God could bipass the duality of things in order to lead us to enlightenment more quickly without the pains of awakening to a strong deficite that we had been living with for so long.
I have been and will be critical of divinities the same way i am critical of the rich people during poverty. Divinities have so much and we have so little. This simply can’t be fair or excusable.
I think that such views are derivative of man. We have created the narrations that make God a king and thus it is our own conceptualizations that we have come to despise. But shouldn’t the absurdity of the conclusion makes us question the premises we have so far accepted to created?
Here is a question that one ought to ask himself before attempting a conceptualization of God:
“Is human life special? Is it inherently valued?”
I mean here that there might be a God that exist, but that does not mean that he/she or it, is a steward to man.
You might be interested in Buddhist deity practice - its philosophical grounding is very interesting. Though from a Buddhist point of view, vajrayana practices can be confusing and even dangerous to those who don’t already have a solid meditation practice. They aren’t practices to be engaged in by dabblers, or without strict instruction and guidance by a qualified teacher.
Have you considered that what is unpleasant and even destructive to the body, or the mind, may yet be beneficial and absolutely necessary for the soul to advance itself toward its ultimate destiny? That is the unstated position of many of the rich, during poverty. Unstated, because the wise make no apologies to the fools for their wisdom. But knowing about this, you may begin to re-evaluate your worldview until a great many things that were formerly confusing, now begin to make perfect sense to you.
“It might even be possible that what constitutes the value of these good and revered things is precisely that they are insidiously related, tied to, and involved with these wicked, seemingly opposite things–maybe even one with them in essence. Maybe!”
For someone who has resently been saved I can relate because God has been speaking to me about actively seeking the Kingdom. This is important from the perspective of my free will and self awareness. This call to activity is not from a physical cause but from self-awarness as motivation for movement: free will. Inner space or spirit is the scene of my freedom. God is telling me to stop acting mechanically and make use my power of self-awareness, only then can I attain the level of a person. It is exciting and very liberating to experience this freedom of living instead of being lived. After you believe then, it is your aim to be free as you can. Athough, absolute freedom to its fullest degree I dont think is attainable in this life. The classic expression of this experience is found in Saint Pauls letter to the Romans: My own behaviour baffles me. For I find myself not doing what I really want to do but doing what I really loathe. Yet surely if I do things that I relly don’t want to do, it cannot be said that “I” am doing them at all,-it must be sin that has made its home in my nature.
peace,