Act one, scene one

Tears of empty loneliness….

Through the door with a dozen roses,

Vase, water, and placed on the dining room table.

“These are for you”

Then straight to the liquor cabinet, a pitcher of martinis,

And the chair in front of CNN…

Drops of water fall from crimson petals….

You’ve produced a complete mood with an economy of words.

I think I’d call that…poetry.

Well done.

Thanks Rainey, but it isn’t “poetry”. It isn’t even acceptable prose. I don’t know what it is, but for a few thoughts. I’ve tried to write poetry and just ended up sounding like someone trying to write poetry… Word expression is hard work and takes skill. I’m lazy, and have no skill.

skill schmill (<–poetry) :laughing:

Here’s a few haikus i wrote today (they’re so easy).

People expecting,
Things of which i know not.
But what do they know.

The future comes fast.
Easy to lose your footing.
Nobody will wait.

(basically my general mood of the day)

Haikus are an easy place to start. Once you get good at them other prose and poetry will come easier.

here’s a tip. Think of what you want to say with the poem, and let it flow from your brain… think, dont write.

Oh, I know this feeling well. I think what keeps me at it is that no matter the result, at least I know I created something new. That’s got to be worth something I think. If nothing else I amuse myself. :laughing:

But I was in earnest, JT. You painted a mood and it came across as sincere and not manufactured. It didn’t, in other words, “sound like someone trying to write poetry.” I think you should keep at it.

I agree, there was a few misplaced elements but it was a nice little read.

Wonderer,

I fooled around with Haiku, both in 5-7-5 and even 3-5-3, but everything I wrote seemed contrived. You mentioned misplaced elements. True. And that is why I can’t seem to write well. Disparate elements, but seeing patterns is how I think, and unfortunately, how I write.

Rainey,

You’re more than kind, and I’ll write a few lines now and then. But it won’t be poetry, just something I want to say in my convoluted way… Oddly, what triggers it rarely has anything to do with what I write. But just for old conversation sake,

Manila redolent with pine tar snakes throught the blocks,

  to confirm stiff sail cloth rising.

Double hitch at the dew covered chock and line coiled bristol,

  we make way in the early mist.

Nice. I can feel it.

You sound like a man who knows his knots. I’m ashamed to have to admit I have never taken the time to learn them. Isn’t that tragic? Just the trusty reef knot. Everything on the Faydelis was tied with a reef knot. (Sometimes a double reef if I felt especially serious about making sure of something not slipping through…)

Well, I had to know knots and bends. I was taught by an old Salt who sailed in the 20’s and 30’s. In his eyes, you had to know them all for the sake of safety. There is a proper use for almost every knot, and he drilled them into me. Along the way I caught the bug, and learned how to do all my own rigging as well. I can worm, tar, and parcel with the best of 'em. Hell, I even learned how to make baggy wrinkle. :laughing: But a lot of what I learned is for the old timey wooden boats. Today, everything is stainless and nylon or poly prop. I miss that old man… His favorite line: “They used to send men of steel to sea in wooden ships. Now the send wooden men in steel ships.”

This has nothing to do with poetry… :astonished:

And yet, strangely, in some sense I can’t seem to separate sailing from poetry.

Your sailing mentor sounds like he was a hell of a man. One belonging, I fear, to a different age.