Alien etiquette
Here begins your lessons in dealing with interplanetary species.
Firstly, if beings have come from the other side of the galaxy/universe it is not a good idea to point guns at them ~ they have way superior technology to you! If they want to take you over, then you are fucked, just accept that as more advanced beings they probably wont even want to.
When you visit the homes of your alien hosts, there are a few things you should know.
General daytime rules;
When you stay at an alien b & b do not ask for eggs for breakfast ~ you never know if they are reptilians who lay eggs.
Also don’t think that asking for a vegetarian meal will get you off the hook, some aliens are in fact intelligent vegetables.
General night time rules;
When it comes to sexual encounters there are a few things you should know…
Firstly, the general rule being that aliens come in all shapes and sizes, and have any manner of appendages, is;
When you encounter an amorous alien before you on a bed, smell the orifices, if one doesn’t smell of shit, it generally means you can stick your dick into it [unless you are gay]
Even then, you don’t want to be shagging the hell out of it, and giving it tongue only to find you got the whole thing upside down, and you are in fact performing 69 while licking its arsehole out.
What’s worse, you don’t then want a more humanoid alien to burst into the room shouting ’what the hell are you doing with my dog!
These things are not the correct way to behave with interplanetary species.
perhaps you have some ideas as to alien ethics?
ok so i am drunk and insane. 
