I recently heard this assertion that all sexual fantasy ultimately boils down to playing with power. Games of submission and dominance, bondage and discipline, role-playing and the like are all really just different ways for two (or more) people to play with power.
Do you agree or disagree and why?
This implies that the root game is really submission and dominance. One player wants to be controllED and one want to be controllING.
I disagree. Sometimes I just see a magazine, and the Chick is hot, the image invokes a caveman like reaction, and I have a little fantasy in my head. ITs just in the genes.
No. That’s just ONE POSSIBLE dichotomy that all fantasies can be regressed into. On the other hand, I tell my students that my clinical and research work indicates that the vast majority of relationship problems DO boil down to “control.”
So, I’d say that one COULD conceptualize all sexual fantasies as relating to power, but that does not necessarily mean they all ARE motivated by such a factor. For example, ROMANCE is a motivator. Once again, someone could argue that, say, “being swept up” is “giving control over to the other.” However, the “interpersonal circumplex” of relationships (originally created in part by one of my idols, Timothy Leary…) has TWO dimenstions: Control/subordination and Like/Hate (or Affiliation/Distance or any similar notion). Thus, we could also frame all sexual fantasies as lying on some point of a “love/hate” dimension, just as the “all fantasies are about control” argument.
I have a feeling Tab is not giong to like my “I can see it from all perspectives” position… 
Sorry - wrapped up in latex at the moment, [size=150]Ouch ! [/size]- cut it out will you - I’m trying to type here. [size=150]Yee-owch ! [/size] Okay-okay Sorry Mistress can I have another…?
Gotta go to work, get back to ya.