In the post today was a letter accusing me of failure to own a TV licence. My non-ownership is to be formally investigated.
The story…
…………a letter arrived from TV Licencing. It was addressed to The Occupier (i.e. not to me personally). It informed me that my household is one of only 5% in the UK that does not own a TV licence. They therefore feel compelled to write to me to inform me of this and to enquire whether or not their information is correct and if it is, why I do not possess said licence. Further, they informed me that this compulsion to write with these requests is an obsession for which the only cure is a communication from myself assuring them that their suspicions are groundless. In other words, it seems that unless I perform certain actions as prescribed by them, I can expect to continue to receive letters. This situation is reminiscent of Harry Potter: when the Dursleys refused to allow Harry to read his letter from Hogwarts, further letters were delivered, and the more the Dursleys refused to respond, the greater the number of letters that poured through their letter box, down their chimney etc. So it appears I can expect something similar from the TV Licencing people. Fortunately, having seen Harry Potter, I have been shown the method by which such invasive tactics should be dealt: I will relocate to a remote rock somewhere off the coast of the UK. (I am assuming, of course, that the TV licencing people do not have access to flying motorbikes or other magical transportation that would allow them to foil my attempted evasion.)
As a matter of interest, the reason I do not possess a TV licence is because my digital TV packed in and I was not sufficiently inspired by what was on offer from the TV broadcasting companies to feel that I wished to buy a new TV. I did write to the TV licencing people explaining the situation and informing them that I would no longer require a TV licence. This occurred several years ago and seems to have no bearing, in the minds of the TV licencing people, on the current situation.
The serious side of this is that I am currently being hounded for the crime of failing to possess a TV licence for no better reason than that I do not possess a TV licence……………guilty until proven innocent.
The bizarre side of this is that it is getting very close to the kind of handling of the law as is portrayed in Kafka’s The Trial.