sometimes the problems are just in the way you look at them.
God grant me serenity to accept the things I can not change
courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference.
You see the cultural things you notice are above your influance except to make people aware of the problem.
The influance you want to exert can be done in subtule ways. When dealing with people that are annoying, I just brush off the ignorance and work with the good. I cultivate by the very attention and acceptance they desire. For you see people are very stuborn. Especially the ones who believe they are self empowered above God’s will. They are very pridefull and refuse to admit they are wrong. So I just use a form of brain washing by limiting perspective to the people in my every day life.
As for the outlets your imediate family won’t give you, I sugest you find a network of friends with simular interrests.
hey… you are right… there are some prideful and stubborn people… the problem is when you depend on those crazy people for your survival…
how do you brainwash ppl? tell me more about that, cause I’ve tryed everything,like cold polite reasoning to which they reply with loud nonsense, being pittied to which they reply with cruelty and a sick vicious grin, and I’ve also tryed self- assertion and defiance, and that’s actually what gets me into more trouble…
and I’m not complainging about…stupid teenage stuff, like , ‘my parents don’t let me go out and don’t give me money’ or ‘they don’t buy me a car when they could buy me 10 with the money they have’ ( that’s my case too, but I don’t care about that really…I’ll buy my own car).
my problem atm is waaay serious and you’d feel sorry seriously, you’d tell me to just run away…
but I don’t want to throw my life away like that, I want to try and fix things…
fix things they should be fixing…it’s pathetic when the victim wants to signt the ‘peace agreement’ and not the agresors that are sorry…
anyway… what would jesus do? (jk) lol… what should I do!?
I can’t do that…
I think I’m gonna kill mylsef, or die from a heart attack from all my suffering…
it’s not depresion, it’s a serious problem I have and I’m not supported by anyone.
I know… I just don’t wanna say it here… I’m too ashamed…and scared and all.
but I’m being strong. after all, it’s true that life doesn’t matter, and death doesn’t either, and since I’m living right now, I’d rather keep on doing it…kinda like W.C.'s argument.
but… also cause there are things in life that are worth it… feelings, music, people that teach you things… friends…waking up every morning and eventhough you may wake up with a racing heart and saying ‘damn not again’ like me lately…like a month or so ago…feeling there is still a chance to fix things and to make cruel people, (specifically parents in my case) regret it and maybe even feel bad for what they did…
my problem is kind of like… I’m really screwed up right now, imagine I have some sort of chronic and/or terminal illness…
and my parents don’t give a damn and eventhough they have a bunch of money, ( a bunch literally) won’t help me in any way…
F%$&% up , ain’t it?
ok I said it.
So, it’s a disease that can only be cured with a lot of money. And your parents have that kind of money, but won’t spend it on a cure.
This is not a suggestion, but would you inherit anything if your parents would die on you? If you would (and if you wouldn’t, then apparently they don’t even consider you their child), then can’t you ask them for it in advance?
An allusion to that picture of his. In the thread beginning with your essay, “The Feminization of Man”, which I find excellent, he also immediately reared his head, which gave me the impression that he was kind of your sidekick, like in a Disney movie.
I know I’m 20, but I still feel like a kid…I mean, I need my parents to pay for my college education like everyone here does, but my father always bitchs (sorry) about it…
as if I wasn’t his daughter, I mean c’mon,some foster kids have it better than me … and I know you’ll say I’m old and I’m not a kid at 20, but I’m weak…I feel shy and weak, and it’s all beacuse of the way the’ve always treated me.
I’m sick of this… what can I do? is there any institution like ‘make a wish’ that can help me through the tragedy I’m stuck in right now and after I’m strong get back at my parents?
cause If I don’t do anything, the only way I’ll get out of this big and beautiful house of hell is crazy or dead.
ps. saulwelios, I could use some occult help if you have any advice…I’m open to anything rele right now…
I may inherit stuff if they don’t write me off their will legally, like they might, just out of sadism cause ive never been mean to them or anything…
but I sure can’t ask them in advance, cause theyd just hate me more for ‘killing them’ , i mean, they’d put it that way… and be like ’ oh my GOD ( they are diehard catholics) she’s only interested in our money, and use that against me by exagerating stuff and playing the victims with the rest of my family…
I dunno… I just know I’m a victim of emotional abuse…and sometime ago it was physicall… not to the point of extreme cases, like the ones you see in alcoholic families, but still it happened…
and… the worst thing is I can’t blame it on alcohol, only on their inherent cruelty…
and it’s not really a terminal illnes… it’s more of a chronic illness, one that can really screw up my life and I want this life to make a point and get even…
I know this aren’t ‘angel-like’ intentions…but…I mean, I’m human…
and like the good charlote song says, I just wanna live…lol.
If this is the definitive reason you choose to live, you will not live for long I think. Some things cannot be “fixed”. Cruel people cannot be “made” to do anything. The only thing that can consistently be done is that you can handle your own baggage and live your life making the decisions that you feel are best. If you live life under the idea of “fixing” or “making” other people, then you are trying to force your will on someone where it potentially never will occur.
I suppose the bottom line is that YOU want your parents to feel bad. Obviously, they’re fine with their decision. You can choose to call them dickheads if that’s what you want to do, but don’t count on them feeling badly.
you know what… you are right, I can’t make someone feel something I want them to feel.
I’ll just try to do my own thing and they’ll realize I’m strong… they may feel bad and sorry, or they may not, but they’ll see I’m strong without a doubt…
