A magnet in my hands
Repelling thoughts
From extraction
A wild beast rages
Nararrating in
foreign planes
But sounds do not turn doorknobs.
I practice my stare
Running my hands through my hair.
It is not a question of what to write
But how to write for you
Great pic Gobbo.
So the poem sucks?
I posted first then read the poem.
No the poem doesn’t “suck†but it’s not one of your best mainly because it’s forced and doesn’t really say anything.
It seems you’ve just let you mind flop from one overly self-conscious thought to another without having an idea or direction beyond ‘thinking about thinking’.
This is fine when you’re young and stoned but it’s not much fun for the old sober reader on the outside.
oh… I wanted it to come off as sort of cheesy, like me thinking about what would become a finished, good poem.
Ummmmm… not terribly interesting for us though.
Imagine finding a poem that blew you away? What would it be about and how would it be written?
This is a technique that can help break the “I am writing a poem; what will I write about” mode.