I feel like telling a story , hmm… which one ??? where to begin ?? at the beginning ?? in the middle ??? I dont know the notion and concept of death has been permeating the atmosphere of my mind for many months now the subject of life after death , death afterlife has been cropping up all over the place wakes hospitals heart attacks and funerals . it gets the mind going . the wheels are turning to the tune of what happens when our turn of wheel is up ??? if there is no afterlife then whats the point of this one ?? are we all just blind lemmings with no real purpose and no known destination or are we cogs in some great machine who cant see past there own part to know the whole ??? I doubt if I can ever answer these questions . I doubt if I even know what questions to ask , maybe that in itself is the point .
there is no explanation for any of it imp beginning to believe . where we look for meaning and see signs I see the laws of chance and chaos in effect. every coincidence that can happen will happen at one point or another. I kind of think that we should not be looking to these so called meaningful coincidences for meaning ,rather , we should look at the connections we make with people . if we look beneath the surface of such connections then thats were we are going to find … what I dont know ?
there is no higher purpose to which I have pursued or could have even strived for . in effect I am without purpose , no rhyme or reason for the things that happen can I see so then I ask again what is the point ???
then just when we ( now let me tell you we is me and I is us ) have gotten a hold of what we think is the limit of mental illness and mans depression new phobias new problems arise in the makeup of man . the problem my friends is one of apathy . too many people cannot find a reason for living for surviving for doing the things they have come to know as ordinary . there is no ordinary . there is only individual when enough individuals get together who have similar opinions you get a group . the problem arises because majority is not the absolute. the few who are minority will raise doubt will bring question to the fore ,thats the ticket , question . ask and ye shall receive . ive been asking for awhile and I have received nothing .is it lost is the cause hopeless?? I think not , so I will ask again , WHY ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!