DethStryke Lyrics

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1

This whole wedding singer thing has me thinking about my old band, DethStryke, so I thought I would post up some of our lyrics. I think I will post a song and then wait a few days to see if anyone wants to say anything about it and then post another one and so on. I’ve got five I really like, so I’m going to start with what I think is our funniest song:

Lyrics: “Death of a Fry Jockey” by DethStryke

It’s an hour before dawn after a bottle of Jack,
and much like usual I’m having a hunger attack.
I don’t need a salad or low Carbs, I need lots of grease,
For that sweet frying oil gives me an orgasmic release.

I walk in and on the menu I do not see,
A section proclaiming curly fries and gravy.
I look again wondering if I drank too much,
But, they aren’t there for breakfast, dinner, or lunch.

(Chorus)

Nowhere to go at four in the morning,
I’m in mourning.
Nowhere to fill my intoxicated gut,
Stuck in a rut.
Nowhere to get my curly fries,
So it’s no surprise;
That tonight is the night,
Everyone in Hardee’s dies.
(End chorus)

I mailed an anthrax complaint to the supervisor in charge,
I told her that I want a medium, hell, make it a large.
I voiced my opinion with an AK-47 in my hand,
I screamed, “CURLIES,” as I threw a grenade from the van.

The manager said no, I told her she was mean,
Then, I covered the whole fucking place in gasoline,
I lit a fire and I danced through the night,
I was convinced that I was in the right.

(Chorus)

Nowhere to go at four in the morning,
I’m in mourning.
Nowhere to fill my intoxicated gut,
Stuck in a rut.
Nowhere to eat my curly fries,
So it’s no surprise;
That tonight is the night,
Everyone in that place dies.

(End chorus)

I got out after serving a no parole ten year,
I walked into Hardee’s knowing my curly fries were near.
I had heard that they brought them back three years ago,
Now the wait is over and off to Hardee’s I had to go.

I went into Hardee’s fearing being recognized on the sneak,
Then, I found out they got rid of the fries last week.
The clerk asked, “Would you like fries with that,” he was out of luck,
Because I pulled my forty-five and muttered, “You stupid motherfuck.”

(Chorus)

Nowhere to go at four in the morning,
I’m in mourning.
Nowhere to fill my inebriated gut.
I can’t get out of this rut.
Ten years, I still have no curly fries,
So, it’s no surprise.
That that night and this night,
(Hopefully everynight)
Everyone in that place dies.

Nowhere to eat my curly fries,
so it’s no surprise,
That tonight is the night,
Everyone in Hardee’s dies…

2

Man, what kind of tune fits that…? I wish I could have seen you play.

3

We were original to say the least. I’ll post new lyrics tomorrow.

Inebriated and Intoxicated have the same number of syllables, it was almost no different. In fact, sometimes I forgot to sing, “inebriated,” rather than, “intoxicated,” in the last refrain.

4

Didn’t the purist fans complain bitterly…?

5

My love for you is like a clock
berzerker!
would you like to make some fuck?
berzerker!

6

“When I Shave my Hairy Ass”

By: DethStryke

(Verse 1)
When the night is young,
and I am just going out;
I put my jeans on,
But, my girl starts to pout.
(She says)
“Your bitching I don’t mind,
it’s fine if your behavior is crass;
But, you really fucking need to,
Shave your fucking ass.”

(Chorus)
When I shave my hairy ass,
My woman starts to sway;
When I shave my hairy ass,
She licks it right away.

Because the razor burns,
Burn like a candle’s wick;
And that is why,
I refuse to shave my hairy dick.

(Verse 2)

So, we are driving and,
we finally reach the club;
She gives my ass,
A friendly little rub.

It feels good for a minute,
But just then;
I realize my allergies to shaving cream,
Are doing their dirty work again.

(Chorus)

When I shave my hairy ass,
I plan to be in luck,
Even if it burns,
I will still get a fuck.

Even if it is red and purple,
and whatever other colors they say;
I still have a nice bald ass,
So I am going to get some today.

(Verse 3)

So I get on the floor,
And then I start to dance;
I bust a hard move,
That rips a hole in my leather pants.

The underside tore,
And it took my skin too,
Now I can’t even sit down,
Oh what will I do?

(Chorus)

When I shave my hairy ass,
Yes I do say;
That I will sleep standing up,
Because I cannot sit or lay.

I’m not getting a piece,
Not any time soon,
Because those freaking pants,
and the allergy
and the razor burn
and the rash
and the pre-existing scar tissue
and the rugburn
and the time that I was in prison and…never mind

Either way, when I shave my hairy ass,
It just isn’t right,
I might think I’m getting some,
But it just makes for a bad night.

7

I almost forgot completely about this thread. I only have one more of our songs I really want to post the lyrics to. This one is kind of a slower song and is very close to just being a spoken word song except for the refrain.

“I Just Want to Live”

I suppose in the past there was no empathy,
It stands to reason in the present there is only hate or apathy;
I suppose in the past the weapons were just smaller,
It stands to be more exciting since the buildings are so much taller.

I suppose that lack of concern is the general consensus,
It stands to reason that the best neighbors are those with the best fences;
I suppose people think that there is nothing to lose,
It stands to reason that it only happens on the news.

I don’t want to watch the news.

Let the politicians do the politicking,
Let the warmongers wage their battles;
The terrorists may terrorize,
I just want to live.

The Blitzkrieg shocked fewer than it should,
But even fewer are concerned with the common good;
The people back then were reaching for their arms,
But now it just takes a button to unleash many harms.

I suppose on D-Day nobody was taken by surprise,
Except for those that felt their brains leaking out of their eyes;
I suppose when 1 in 5 are below poverty nobody really cares,
Except for the 20 percent who are caught unawares.

The news fills me with scares.

Let the politicians do the politicking,
Let the warmongers wage their battles,
the terrorists may terrorize,
I just want to live.

Why can’t we all just want to live?