Does Love Even Exist?

Hi, I’m Yan
I feel sorry for you beau that something in your past has caused you to adopt such a sinical view on things especially on love. actually I’m one year younger than you are (and I am not in love with any girl at the moment either, there is a girl that I think I love but that’s about it)…

I don’t think that love is a universal thing that one can define it with one definition. the reason is that we humans are very different, we have very different personalities, characteristics hence we LIKE different things. so the ideal girl to you will very likely to be different from the ideal girl to me. now I think that if you analyse what does it mean when someone says he is in love, you will come to a point where you realise that what he means is that he has found a girl, who has a possession of characteristics, personalities and perhaps material features and objects … that he is really really fond of. in another word, when he says he loves a girl, he means he loves the things that the girl possesses (as it is not possible to love and be with a personality, characteristics without the girl). I then conclude that love is a result or product of this fondness of the things.

if we now go back to reality where this world is turning into more and more materialistic in the sense that people like to have good money, and all that, it can be easily seen why people nowadays often divorced because of financial problem. love, nowadays, to most people, being the product of fondness of materials, will therefore of course make relationship fragile because material things do not last with a person. when you get old you tend to loos money or your physical features are not as attractive as they used to be.
so don’t be put off by the many cases of divorce and fragile relationship around you. I’m sure that if the kind of things you are very fond of (hence producing love) is not entirely based on materialistic stuff then you’ll be able to find a girl that you will have a good relationship with.
I would love to have a girlfriend who are very intelligent, speak her mind, and it would be great if she can play chess and other board games because I’m very fond of them, I haven’t met a girl who is exactly like that yet but I believe that I will. some people may not like girls of that kind and they might prefer caring girls so their sort of love is different from mine.

I like the philosophy of the writer who said that love is what a couple married 40 years feels and love is the emotion that drives a single mom to work 60 uncomplaining back breaking mimimum wage hours to take care of her kids. Whoever wrote about that understands a great deal about love.
I would like to hear more of his thoughts


Yes it exist we created love (we created love because love is a description). Love isn’t really a physical thing one can own, it is a description of feelings for one person. If any of you fall in love you will love the feeling and will be certain it exist.

Hello Beau (and everyone else), I’m Vitali and new here as well.

Your question is a good one, and I will give my opinion (my apologies if anyone else has presented this, but I don’t have time to read all the replies to this intriguing topic :slight_smile:)

Now love, IMO, does exist. It’s based on a strong attachment to someone, and as an early poster pointed, there are different types of love. Now let’s discuss romantic love.

Romantic love, is hard to define (as anything else internal). I believe this is due to the fact that everyone experiences love differently, everyone has a unique type of ‘love’ (most even lead to different ways of expressing this love).

Let’s assume we have boy X and girl Y, they claim to love each other. Boy X says it’s pure love, girl Y agrees but in reality it’s not true (she’s lying!). What could explain this? Not only do their types of love differ, but also I believe ‘pure’ love is just the highest form of love you’ve ever experienced. Think of the first time you had a crush (yes, now you consider it a crush :wink:) on a girl, you were head-over heels (this might of happened a looong time ago). That was your highest (and only) type of love you had experienced, thus that was pure love for you (which it really wasn’t by individual or societal definition).

So now one explanation for boy X and girl Y’s situation is that girl Y has loved more than what she has with boy X, or simply that she had a high point of love with boy X but that never evolved or it declined, thus leaving girl Y to want something else.

So what is pure love? The highest form of love you’ve experienced, that’s why when we find ourselves head-over-heels for someone at an older age, we’re consumed into the emotion. Unforunately this deteriorates quite quickly, either because we don’t get the response we want, or because it was just another fantasy of what could have been that, in reality, is something totally different.

Love does exist, but if we set our mood to be pessimistic or our expectations for what love should be, we’ll never achieve love (except in my case, I was sceptic but managed to be ‘cured’ :slight_smile:).

In order for love to work, both have to be open to each other, that means vulnerability. You can’t have pure love without showing your inner self to whom you want to love.

Hello Beau

You are right that most humans don’t know what love really is, and a lot of the posts here proves that.

Love IS real, and if you want a purpose for your life / existence… then make it your goal to find, know & understand the meaning of true love. Never give up, hold hope in your heart that one day you will find it.

Here is a story, that to me, demonstrates love in a simple & sweet way:

A mother has a baby that another woman takes from her.
They are arguing over who the baby belongs to.
The local king hears of the argument and says “Ok, if you both claim that you are the mother of this baby then I shall devide the baby up into two pieces so that you can both have him”
The real mother screams “no, don’t do that, I would rather this imposter have the baby than for any harm to come to him”
and from this act of LOVE the king knows which of the women is the real mother, and gives the baby back to her.

Love isn’t about owning, or possessing - and that is where 99% of humans get it wrong. Love has no conditions.

Love is the polar opposite of fear (not hate) and just as real.


PS. You’ve got to start by loving yourself :wink:

Actually, love does exist for earthlings…

As for the rest of the universe?

Well, at least we don’t have it here in heaven

Hello. First time poster but a big fan of the site.
If we can occasionally feel ‘love,’ then it exists. Whether it is a moments passio or a lifelong commitment, it happens. Happiness doesn’t last for ever, nor excitement, nor any emotion. I don’t think we need to qualify an emotion by it’s longevity.

Love certainly does exist. Everyone can sit here and try to define it within the construct of the English language but I find that impossible. One can give countless examples pertaining to subjective experiences of love. The key word there is subjective. If love was objecive it would be considerably easier to understand and there would be no need for this thread. Everyone’s experiences with love and perceptions of those experiences are different, making language not worthy of describing something so powerful. Attempting to describe something this strong with analogous relationships does not deliver it the same way it is perceived.I think that love is a language of its own; of the soul/mind. It brings two people together because perhaps they come to agreement on what love means. And one’s subjective definition of love can change, which would in turn cause relationship problems. We think in language but feel in emotions, so there is no corallation there. Any kind of relationship there would revolutionize the way we live.

That’s it. That’s utterly and completely hitting the nail on the head.

Now if only I could find it…

Just adding my 2 cents

In the most simplistic way I can say about love is…Love is the extension of self in the direction of want.

Love is a state, not fragmented emotions based on the many different perceptions of what love should be.

Love is Love as a whole.

Cannot the whole being of you come together as a whole and see that love is just that? A whole But because we are fragmented based on our beliefs, love is fragmented and heavily based in attachment.

When we start to break down what love is, do we not move further away from what it is? The knowledge we have of love is based on what we were taught and through years and decades of disfunction on this planet, we have removed love from our beingn and therefore serch our whole lives looking for this thing called love.

My suggestion, look in the mirror and start there. :wink:

Well said. A loving response to a question about love. That, my friend, is love, I think.