The premise of my question is based on the observation that majority of people have the wrong perception of love.
- I noticed that “love” in the sense of loving other people does not exist in reality.
Why not? Please explain this further.
Love comes from within and is projected outwards. That’s how we can love someone that dislikes us.
Love exists because we say that it does. That’s why there is a word for it.
Just because we say something exists may not mean it exists. We could make a story out imagination and it will not exist anywhere else. A more appropriate thought could be, “what brings it into existence?”
No, the word “love” is not the same as creating a story. However, even a story exists in whatever state a story exists in. It is not the case that Star Wars does not exists. It may not exist as a set of real events, but the story (as a story) exists as a set of real events.
The word “love†(think Heidegger now) was invented by someone to express a feeling that they were having that there was no word for. Some caveman felt a sensation welling up in his chest and said, “me…ahhhh…me…love you!" and the rest was history.
The word describes a state and was invented to do so. Love exists.
Humans have not invented the word “12rtysting” to name a state of being because there is no such state. No one could relate to it or even think it up because it is beyond us to feel 12rtysting. If we can make it up, then it means something.
at least half of everything that we see/feel/think is perception anyways–so we may never know whether something is real or not…
but have you ever felt that you would sacrifice anything for someone?
or admired someone without telling them?
or been in love with someone without telling them?
sure, maybe romantic love doesnt exist, but there is such a thing as selfless love for someone. for how else would you explain these things?
love is a feeling, and the word “love” is simply an easy and vague name for it. but seriously, i always complain about how there arent enought words in the english language-or any language for that matter, everything is too general–especially when describing feelings.
in fact, no one feeling is the same for any two people in the world–so your feeling of the word “love” can easily be different than mine.
How do you know no one feeling is the same for any two people?
What if you"re feeling really sympatico with someone?
How exactly did you notice this?
Yes it does, asswipe. I’m a living proof.
Perhaps I should have reframed the question. What we should probably be looking at is “what is love?”
Please post one or two sentences stating what you think that love is. I find the way that you write to be confusing.
It seems like you are saying that love should not contain responsibility or something. I’m confused.
Also, what does “finding love outside†mean? Each individual, in my view, is generating their own love feelings and such feelings can’t be “found†anywhere. They are within people and then expressed by people.
Love is so profound when explaining and yet so simple when found that it is not possible to explain it a couple of sentences. I would rather want to hear what you have to say about “what is love”. Try a couple of paragraphs. What feelings, attitudes, thoughts and actions do you attribute to love? Why do you want to love? What kind of a person do you think is worthy of your love? What would make you more worthy of someone else’s love? Can you go on without love? Why do so many people struggle through many relationships and still keep going? As you look at these issues in detail you realize that they have no short-form answers. How would you answer these questions?
Why don’t you answer (to clarify) my questions. I think that it is wrong to pose questions and then not clarify.
However, I will work on some answers to your last post.
you can never really “know” anything, but im pretty sure, since even the persons attitude reflects on their feeling of “love” and every other aspect of a personality is tied in with it.
also, now that i think of it, i really dont think that sex ties into love. it is, after all, a flesh act; just something programmed into us.
I did not notice your post until I had sent my reply. I look forward to your reply.
To answer your question. By within and outside I am referring to ourselves in “I” form where “I” is the soul. Many of us make the mistake of expecting that another soul can satisfy our needs but in reality each soul exists only for the goal of becoming one with the universe. To achieve that it goes through a process of self-discovery and self-development over time sometimes over lifetimes (reincarnation).
When a soul begins to find itself it becomes love, because love (or the universe in totality) begins to breathe through it. When that happens the soul no more needs to search for love in others. Rather it attracts others to love it, which is why I was saying initially that our normal conception of love may not be correct.
What’s with the influx of love threads? It would have been more convenient for me to enter into these conversations during the time while I was more comfortable believing in the positive aspects of it. I am so despondent from confusion and hurt that I too question it’s existence or purpose, at least in the romantic sense.
Right, I’m out, just so you know… 
I like the love threads. As a psychotherapist I am surrounded all the time by what makes people unhappy. It’s old hat to me by this time and can predict what people are going to say next. However, love is something that is not as predictable in my opinion. I needs to be explored.
Also, sex and love go together in my opinion. I have no sexual attraction to women that I don’t have feelings for.
Why should you be out and have given up on the most basic thing that drives mankind? Is it something related to difficult childhood or teenage or a desire for an explanation of how the world works which most of our theories cannot even partially address? What do you want from love?
TheAdlerian, it is predictable- for the artist it is a foolish muse… it is to put all of your emotions into the hands of another to decide. It is a fountain of energy that leaves you dry and a clear starry night that reigns all over you.