Dog Food for Thought

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.

  • Anonymous

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.

  • Will Rogers

Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.

  • Ann Landers

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.

  • Ben Williams

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than they love themselves.

  • Josh Billings

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

  • Andy Rooney

We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It’s the best deal man has ever made.

  • M. Acklam

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

  • Rita Rudner

Anybody who doesn’t know what soap tastes like never bathed a dog.

  • Franklin P.

If your dog is fat, YOU aren’t getting enough exercise.

  • Unknown

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can.
That’s almost $21.00 in dog money.

  • Joe Weinstein

Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? We come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we’re the greatest hunters on earth!

  • Anne Tyler

You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, “My God, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!”

  • Dave Barry

Dogs are not our whole life, but they do make our lives whole.

  • Roger Caras

If you think dogs can’t count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them.

  • Phil Pastoret

My goal in life is to be as good of a person as my dog already thinks I am.

  • Unknown

“If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.”

-Mark Twain

This reminds me of a closing argument I had to read from an actual civil case where an attorney gave a speech (paraphrasing quite badly here) that was said to have brought jurors to tears. It went something along the lines of

Your wife can leave you
your children can hate you, your friends can betray you, your parents can curse the day you were born, your neighbors can despise you, you can lose your job and all your wordly possessions, you can contract an infectous disease, you can be horribly disfigured, all of mankind can revile you, and only one friend will continue to stand by you after all that, your dog.