I wandered aimless as a cloud,
Toes skimming through the rising tide.
A thousand miles from any crowd;
Mind filled with thoughts of suicide.
Along the beach, beneath the sky,
I wandered on not knowing why.
When all at once, across the bay
A figure kneeling in the sand.
Her head bowed low, as if to pray.
And hand encased in moonlight hand.
What meant she by this midnight act?
With what pains could a girl be racked?
At last stirred from my reverie,
I plodded on along the beach. All the things I can make her see,
All my secrets to her I’ll teach.
And me and her and her and me,
and oh how wondrous it will be!
So close now I can feel her breath;
Rise and fall of her little chest.
Those tiny toes curled in the sand,
The pretty hair, those trembling hands.
I smile to myself, no longer sad;
Looming over, I am her Dad.
I draw the snubnose from my side;
It gleams and shines with certain pride.
The barrel aims straight for her head,
While angels wait to lift the dead.
Steel and child, and prayer and light;
and strange events in dark of night.
A moment and the deed is done,
And soon will come the rising sun.
But not before the morning tide,
Covers the beach before it’s eyed.
Virtue and vice all washed away,
And there will be no hell to pay.
Along the beach, beneath the sky,
Two bodies float, don’t ask my why.
very creepy. i didn’t see that coming…except for the title should of warned me. you have an interesting way of combining old and new styles. perhaps you wanted to remain in the old, but a couple of things gave you away.
for example:
and
but, i don’t think you mind combining the two. now i’m just arbitrarily debating your intentions with myself. and i’ll stop now.
I suppose it’s refreshing to see some darker themed works in CW… I’m certainly too much of a stonehenge to get to this level of cruel.
I have a couple of questions though…
Why does the character simply shoot the girl? I feel like if the teacher is to show the girl the wisdom of the dark half of the world, of pain and suffering, then
a) He’d rape her, hurt her, possibly leave a scar or something
-then-
b)
Either leave, thus sustaining the act of his teaching
or kill her, to signify how one might wish to simply wish to die knowing that the girl would probably end up killing one day as well or something.
then
c) Kill himself, breaking the cycle, or ‘escape’ from the asylum.
So yah… to sum it up I’m a sick fuck who’s disapointed cause the ‘teacher’ doesn’t rape her.
Alexistentialism- thanks for the comments, I was actually just reading a bunch of wordsworth prior to writing this-kind of had ‘I wandered lonely as a cloud in my mind’ as you probably noticed from the first line. i don’t see exactly how the line “With what pains could a girl be racked?” can be seen as modern…any insights?
Old Gobbo, you’re just a sick, sick, man. No, I’m kidding…I’m not sure why I had it end the way it did…I wanted to make it sort of senseless and incomprehensible, just some brute tragedy in the night. Also it might have been hard to convey a rape seen; could’ve used inuendos I guess
I don’t know if it was the Ben Webster that did it to me while I read, or the poem itself, but I want to cry, not knowing why, yes, I want to cry.
I didn’t…sorry…but wanted to.
