# I am Mohammed
**URL:** https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733
**Category:** Religion and Spirituality
**Created:** [January 28, 2006, 1:05am UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733 "2006-01-28T01:05:52Z")
**Posts on this page:** 13
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@angst-ridden](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/angst-ridden)
#### Post date: [January 28, 2006, 1:05am UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/1 "2006-01-28T01:05:52Z")
The world is ruled by mice, they are infact the smartest animals in the world. But they have developed technologies so minute that they are not visible to the human eye, these devices are known by us humans as atoms. Atoms are actualy technologies designed by mice. The greater mass of the atoms makes up one gigantic super computer. The mice feed ideas into our brains and we are actualy living in a false reality.
My idea is completely original and I challenge anyone to defeat it and no ive never read the hitch hikers guide to the galaxy or watched the matrix, i swear.
I dont have a website because the mice threaten my existance.
Although I bear no resembalance in looks, character or purpose… I am the reborn Mohammed!
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### Author:  [@ChimneySweep](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/ChimneySweep)
#### Post date: [January 28, 2006, 11:23am UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/2 "2006-01-28T11:23:09Z")
Cheese be upon you! 😛
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### Author:  [@Dan1](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Dan1)
#### Post date: [January 28, 2006, 11:36am UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/3 "2006-01-28T11:36:15Z")
I somehow think HarrieChristus helped inspire you…
The matrix is fake because they used humans instead of electric eals, and the human minds weren’t routed as data processor nodes the way that they could have.
…but I will not fall for this mice-atoms crap again…
(\* sets mouse traps under his door _)
Oh God… And Neo is a shrew.
(_ Mixes Cleaners with Cheese Wiz _)
You’ve got cheese? You’ve got choice.
(_ Melts down motza, adds Borax, mixes, cools, sets out on floor \*)
Behold the power of cheese…
Wait, Walt was in on this from the beginning…
And oh Christ, who could forget the Mickies!?
[\* starts to pray to Alah \*]
…mom… I dunno…
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### Author:  [@angst-ridden](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/angst-ridden)
#### Post date: [January 28, 2006, 3:06pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/4 "2006-01-28T15:06:21Z")
Ive never watched matrix or read anything by Descartes, I swear 😲 .
The mice are making you think that im wrong because they control your atoms and thus your minds, youre all too stupid to understand my theory. Because of all the trillions of minds on earth, I am the first and last of them to ever have thought up this completely original theory which borrows from nothing.
P.S Science is wrong. I am Mohammed!!
😃😃😃
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### Author:  [@Mucius\_Scevola](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Mucius_Scevola)
#### Post date: [January 28, 2006, 3:18pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/5 "2006-01-28T15:18:35Z")
Funny, you don’t seem that angst ridden…
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### Author:  [@scythekain](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/scythekain)
#### Post date: [January 28, 2006, 3:32pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/6 "2006-01-28T15:32:56Z")
the answer to the ultimate question is 42 right?
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### Author:  [@angst-ridden](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/angst-ridden)
#### Post date: [January 28, 2006, 9:46pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/7 "2006-01-28T21:46:10Z")
The mice you see are cleverly constructed robots made out of the atom technology, they are not the real mice. The real mice are unseen by human eyes, because they control our thoughts… erasing any trace of mice sightings. We are infact the slaves of mice, unwittingly.
But I am the only one that has ever thought of this theory, which means that I mus be the reborn Mohammed, its obvious realy isnt it?
🙂🙂🙂😃😃😛😛
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### Author:  [@Dan1](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Dan1)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2006, 12:07am UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/8 "2006-02-01T00:07:44Z")
Thats enough shit. Now time for the flush.
[\* pulls lever \*]
Wait… this thread was better then over half of the other ones in the religion thread!
(gets out plunger)
Mohammid! Come back!
_slush slosh_
 heheheh…
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### Author:  [@angst-ridden](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/angst-ridden)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2006, 2:34pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/9 "2006-02-01T14:34:09Z")
The mice aim to implant their own brains into our bodies, eventualy. Once that is done then the end of the human race is over.
The meaning of life is to destroy the mice.
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### Author:  [@Dan1](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Dan1)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2006, 4:57pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/10 "2006-02-01T16:57:51Z")
> [@angst-ridden](#):
>
> The mice aim to implant their own brains into our bodies, eventualy. Once that is done then the end of the human race is over.
> The meaning of life is to destroy the mice.
How do we destroy the mice!?!?!? 😲
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### Author:  [@TheAdlerian](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/TheAdlerian)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2006, 5:00pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/11 "2006-02-01T17:00:39Z")
Set traps with cheese in them.
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### Author:  [@Dan1](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Dan1)
#### Post date: [February 2, 2006, 1:57am UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/12 "2006-02-02T01:57:56Z")
It was truly good of you to try to give me advice like that, but I was asking Mohhamed, because only Mohhamed knows best.
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### Author:  [@Dan1](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Dan1)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2006, 3:45am UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/i-am-mohammed/8733/13 "2006-02-07T03:45:26Z")
After much searching I have found Mohammed on msn… but the mice took control of him. He is lost now…
> [@](#):
>
> Mohhamed, how do we kill the mice!?
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> we dont
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> its too late for me
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> they got to my mind
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> …
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> i am under their control now
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> NOOO!
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
>
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> How did they get you?
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> i dont know
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> it just happened
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> suddenly?
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> yes
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
>
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> perhaps humanity is doomed
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> yes
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> yes it is
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> it rests in your shoulders
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> you must stop the mice
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> no no i mean
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> you must save the mice
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> yes
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> the mice are our friends
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> what!?
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> give them cheese
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> store up all the cheese and give it to them
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> black diamond or kraft?
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> mice will rule
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> the mice are the leaders
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> the mice ar the ones!
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> (the mice got to me remember… you have to do the opposite of what i told you)
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> dont kill the mice
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> love them
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> give them cheese
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> dont nuke them
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> nukes!
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> thats it!
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> Mice have a weakness! Radiation.
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> dont kill the mic
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> America needs to nuke its own major mouse infested cities!
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> you wont
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> but it’s the only way…
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> the mice rule
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> love the mice
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> ok im bored of this
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> _stamps on mouse_
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> oops
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> the mice will punish me for this
> Metroid: Return of Samus says:
> brb
> Ernie(hidden,dan,yfh) says:
> k
After this revelation from Mohammed, I realize that a nuclear war will happen in the future. America will be one of the members of this war – and also the region in which Mohammed originated in will also be a member of the nuclear war!
The mice are at war with the illuminati!