my god, i finally did it, i DID IT! with so much help and support from all of you, and so much great sisterly/brotherly advice, especially from shyster who wasnt sick of me even when i PMd her with the same question for the 50th time, i am so glad that i finally did it! I really am!
I broke up with that guy!
but th thing is, now i feel kind of bad, because it was over the phone…i was going to write him an email with the help of shyster, because i am a winp, but he called me today, and asked me if i still wanted to be his girlfriend, and i was so sad to break it to him, but i told him that he would be much happier off without me, and any girl would be lucky to have him, but his voice got stuttery and weak at the end, and i can now just hear him sobbing in my head, it is the saddest thing, and i, being the one who caused these innocent tears to fall, that tension broken, the preganant silcence to cease, i cannot believe it! he was so good to me! he was so kind, he was there for me every minute of every day, abnd said that he will still be there for me and i said that too, but i felt so bad!
Well… at least you finally worked up the courage to do it. A burden has been lifted: try not to replace it with another one (i.e. the burden of conscience). I feel like it was a bad situation, with no clear win-win outcome possible. You have to make a choice though, and it’s never going to be perfect. He was always going to be hurt: but it’s over now, and perhaps you should seperate out your sense of sympathy, from your sense of culpability. It is two different things - to not feel bad about this, and to not feel anything at all in the way of compassion, etc. You shouldn’t have to avoid the latter, just because you want to avoid the former.
In any case, I would say: try not to feel to bad about it, ok?
I just want to say that when you do get involved with somebody new to rememeber this experience, remind yourself that we don’t really know people until we know them. Take time, get to know each other before agreeing to be his girlfriend. You will learn something about yourself. You have a good heart, preserve it.
Still, I’m glad that you did it, ET. What I now recommend is a 2 week long party that mainly consists of really childish practical jokes involving lots of water balloons and a few unused condoms (stretched over the toilet bowl is best but there are plenty of other tricks). On the other hand get addicted to pornography. That’s what I did the last time I split up with someone…
don’t feel bad now because it’s really not going to help, you just have to move on. But as everyone already mentioned, keep this relationship in mind as your litmus test to see if you really want to go out with future guys.
Oh and good job again, it takes a lot of courage to do what you did, and you were able to pull through, you should be proud of that, i know most of us are. =D>
The word “porking” used to be slang for “fucking,” so I was like “what the hell does he mean,” and then I figured you meant pathetically eating. It was a funny moment for me.
