I know this is going to sound real stupid but why do i not have any patience, even now as each year passes my ability to be patient is the same. Any ideas?
I found patiance when I no longer cared about the result, generally patiance is people thinking of other things rather than actually waiting, in this sense patiance as a skill does not exsist, but then I could be mistaken.
perhaps rather than learning to wait, you could learn how to think of other things, all else fails it isn’t any worse. Note: you may wish to use a reminder if you don’t want to forget anything.
On thinking about it, it usually happens when I have made a decision and I am then waiting for the results, this is when it is more prominent.
During various laboritory-tests, they found that pain-tolerance mostly had to do with the DNA and the fine-tuning of the material-brain. It was not a case of who is a “wimp” and who is “strong”. On the contrary, it is mostly genetic. A perfect example of this would be, some mothers need to take many pain-killers after giving birth, or whatever, whilst others are completely fine with the process and don’t need painkillers. But in the lab-tests I read about, they monitored the literal brain activity in various hemespheres, etc.
I am going to guess, that your “not having any patience” is very genetic, or atleast a characteristic which had developed when you were really young perhaps?
Rarely any would dare touch gene-centric psychology, as a study or a potential truth… this is because gene-centric psychology inadvertently appears to slap “free-will” and “self-control” concepts in the face. The secular psychologists and moralists would prefer to minimize the genetic roll of human-mental-emotional-behavior, whilst maximizing the belief in the existence of what others would call “self-determination”…
Perhaps this “self-determination” is yet anther mind-controlling idealistic doublethink?
also:
“I know this is going to sound real stupid but…”
(then lynda goes on to say)
“Why?”
I think that [the] word [“why”] is the opposite of stupid. 
Questions all sound smart to me.
hugs
Impatience is a form of self torture brought on by the fear that you have not done enough to bring the situation to fruition.
One way to get over this is to convince yourself that you have done all you can and getting all wrought up about what other people are doing is a total waste of your enormously productive and useful self.
Not everyone is like you and they will do things in their own way and in their own time. Since you cannot control this, being impatient is a useless and foolish activity and you are a better person than to get caught up in that.
Always remember, act with grace and humor in all situations.
I suppose your right about the impatience coming from the lack of control over other people, i do tend to get frustrated with others at times, thanks for the insight.
I would moreso suggest, that “impatience” happens when a task and a motivation do not move at the same rate or duration of change and existence.
This is not to say your post is untrue in any way, but instead, I would say, your statement is not always or absolutely the case.
In the wider sense of the word, “self-torture” and the sense of need, are one and the same. If any being should so happen to be in a state of extreme need [desire], they will not feel very comfortable or patient with the non-action of waiting.
If someone was severely injured and in need [desire] of medical attension, they would not want to passively sit around and wait for about 10 days before they actually go and get their severed arteries patched up. By then they would be dead… Also, if they only wanted medical attension for a few seconds, and then did not want it anymore, even thought they still would die without it, then that is another case of desire and function not matching in duration.
Step for step, part for part, that sense of desire, need and instinct, is genetic, and is not merely “learned” or “unlearned”, par se. It may be modulated somewhat, and that is all.
“Impatience” may be both a virtue or a demerit, depending on the case, for the impatient may become more refined, more aggressive, more intolerant, more pure and more efficient, whilst the overly-patient may become stagnant, passive, slow and partially-mindless.
The “impatience” of lynda-anne may even go so far as to being one of the main sources of her refined tastes and her finer personality.
As always I suppose its not what you got but how you use it.
Its not pleasant having to wait around for other people while you can go a million miles a minute.
Lightspeed baby. 
Dan~;
I agree that impatience as a bad thing is not always the case. There are execptions to everything, especially in extremis.
But that did not seem to be what the OP was about and that was how I approached it.
I know about going at light speed and patience. I was scattered and impatient but not crazy with it. I had a roomate who was a true scatterbrain, all over the place all the time. Busy as I was, I couldn’t keep up with that.
Meditation brought things into focus but did not slow me down. It took a long time for me to slow down and abandon my impatience or was it just a matter of fitting my hyperactive self into the flow of things.
Go with the flow baby…
You’ll still get there on time but you won’t step on so many toes.
I know how you feel about waiting. When my wife and I rent a movie, the second we walk in the door is the second I’m ready to watch the movie. And don’t get me started on my impatience with other drivers…
I don’t like mental games like “thinking of something else” to calm me down.
I’ve noticed this:
- sometimes people are stuck in the past.
- sometimes people are stuck in the future.
- I’ve been stuck both of these places at times, and when I’m stuck in the future is when I’m feeling impatient.
- when I actively just “be where I am” my impatience melts away.
I do that by very intentionally paying attention to my immediate environment. I look around at objects, one at a time, in my immediate space. After not too long I’m able to calm down and just be right where I am. It’s pretty neat.
When im all tense, frustrated, impatiatiant, usually after i get killed in a multiplayer game, and i cant wait that 10 seconds. Or After a test, maybe before work, anything. Whatever it is. If i just want to losen up and relax, the best remedy i have and it works wonderfully every fucking time. I smoke a nice bowl of Cannibus. Just one. I dont get blazed. Thats for other times. When i just want to ease my mind, put my body at rest, and relax, i smoke one bowl. Its nice…
Yo Desolate Thief,
Do you think Cannibus is the best solution, the only solution, the easiest solution given the circumstances…or some combination of those?
Do you think it’s possible there’s an alternative, BUT ACTUALLY REAL, solution?
Its sad. That you say that. Has the goverment warped your mind that bad? It is a real solution, What is wrong with an Herbal Remedy. You dont have to smoke it. There are pills, Reeses candy, snickers. Loaded with THC. Hell you can buy Cooking butter with THC in it. And it will only affect you body, not your mind. if you consume it through digestion its a body high. SMoking it gives you a mental high. Depending on the plant as well. Or if its Honey Oil, or Hash.
The reason it kills impatience is that you just relax and are content being “high”. they same way the other guy focuses on stuff around the room, you forget about what you waitng for. Weed makes things enjoyable, you get like a aura of happiness. I swear to god. Its a definite mood lifter. You also are high so you probably forget out it anyways. but its not like you forget out it forever, you just wont think on it so often. Weed makes me think but i cant think about mulitiple things. Only really focus on one or 2 things. but im off work, ill elaborate if you have anyquestions just PM me. or repost here. I would like to go in more depth.
Ah! I didn’t mean to say that Cannibus wasn’t a real solution. I totally see how it looked like that.
I was asking if you thought it was possible that there is an ACTUALLY REAL SOLUTION, outside of Cannibus, that might actually work. And while I’m at it, I’ll add, “that might actually work on a permenant basis”.
Obviously Cannibus is a solution because it creates the effect you’re looking for. That’s kind of the definition of a solution.
ok, ummm. Im sure theres anxiety and depression pills out there. I think one is called ZOLOFT. But Nature made bud, man made pills. who do you trust?
ugghh…Pot is FAR FAR FAR better an alternative than any psychiatric drug. That’s, perhaps, the one thing I am very biased against. If anyone reads this and is offended, that’s not my intention, and I don’t want to debate it.
Now, back onto the subject. 
I guess what I was asking is whether you think it’s possible for there to be an entirely drug free permenant solution.
Exercise, i have heard is a very physical test as we all know, but it has various mental affects on you as well. Most Dont know but You release endorphins when you work out. And can very much increase your mood. Take up a sport or activity if you dont like to work out, i work out around 2 times a week and surf around 4 times a week for like 3 hours at a time.
Exercise. That’s an excellent idea. I did know about the endorphins. I’ve worked out at different periods of my life and I do remember feeling better.
I usually recommend to people to just take a walk every day for a half hour, get their attention out of their heads. Also monitor diet, lots of protein, very low sugar. Take a full set of vitamins. And get good sleep.
I’ve had parents come to me thinking they need to put their kids on psychiatric drugs because of their behavior. I have them do the above, with a few other changes for them to make in how they interact with their kid, and the problem solves almost 100% of the time.
It doesn’t work when the parents can’t stick to it for at least a week. People today seem to expect lasting solutions to occur within a few seconds, so they pop a pill…too bad…