Stay virgin unless you find a really nice person, then score carefully & learn it’s not about TV or bullshit, it’s about communication-skills, reality and emotions.
If you are intent on trading sex for commitment then being a virgin or not makes little difference, you are still aiming for a pretty shallow and ineffective relationship. Forget about sex, worry about love. Sex without love can be fun, sure, but eventually it will break down…
If the guy only wants sex with you then is is not the guy for you If you feel that you need him around for a while and …are you trying to get pregnant? I just recalled some of your other threads. Are all these threads pointing towards a decision you are trying to make? Are you trying to move out of a bad situation or get pregnant or both or what?
I may be wrong but, Your threads are tying together in my head. What’s up?
I have never understood how someone else’s sexual behavior could be something a third party had the right or appropriate knowledge of to comment on and judge. All anyone can do, is tell another what was right for themselves, and anyone that takes it further than this is a morally presumptuous ass.
Yep, you cannot make a judgment on something you don’t know, and if you hold something to be sacred you won’t either, but I have no idea what the relevence of these two constraints is to my assertion that telling others what there sexual behavior should or should not be is morally presumptuous and absurd.
Not only is one trying to force one’s personal preferences upon anothers behavior, that in no way effects him/her, but one is also falsely assuming that he/she knows enough about that person and the circumstances they are in to judge better than them what is right/not right for them.
The OP question was incomplete and less than coherent. It deserved to be ignored.
I like Kriswest’s approach. Hear it from another female, Ice. What’s the whole scope? You’re on a philosophy forum, but I think you’re worried for yourself- not (at the time being) curious toward the meaning of it all.
It doesn’t disclude you from being an asset here, of course, it’s really about what you want. And we can all learn from your personal experience. Still, we begin to desire the heart of the matter.
The obvious impression is that you’re a teenage girl that doesn’t want to relegate her life into some loser’s ego stroke. So you want sophistication behind your decisions. You want a guide with a little more credential than mom and a little less cost than a private therapist.
I think, in your current situation, you’re well-suited for religious values and practices. It doesn’t mean you should believe everything a crazy book says. But people seem to adopt religion for the sake of lifestyle structure. The sciences are afraid to actually tell you what to do with your life because they can’t find empirical justification. Still, it’s not fair to tell everyone they’d better handle all their decisions by themselves. From the way that you speak, I think you should stay in the frame of mind that marriage before sex is the proper thing. Then, when you’ve asked many questions and feel a need to break the petty rules- begin to question this doctrine.
If you’re dependant on guardians, and you feel confused . . . Stay in school, don’t have sex, don’t do drugs.
Once you’ve proven to yourself that no one has mastery over you- enjoy the fruits of life as you see fit!
Still . . . question my advice, as I shouldn’t profess wisdom for distraught girls, history has proven me that.
uh-nothing is up really, religiously I ought to stay a virgin but then there is someone that I am very attracted to who I know would never marry me so I was sondering if there was a loophole.
Most women say the process is extremely painful the first time. If you wish to break your faith, do it with someone that you are not attracted to first, then do it with the attractive guy that way nothing will be taken away from your experience with the attractive guy.
That’s my opinion, your initial disagreement would be that would really be going against your faith, but being a virgin twice removed before marriage is no different from the Christian standpoint than a virgin once removed.