Is it better for a woman to stay a virgin?

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21

Ahhh, Ice it is a tough spot you are in that is for sure. There is no loop hole. Lets look at it logically. The fact that you are looking for a loophole means that deep inside the choice for you to have sex with him is wrong. You are looking or justification to do this act. I would just at this point Ice remain friends with the man.

Curb your attraction and save it for the very lucky and special guy that will come along when the time is right. Sex is not just a physical act. It can be charged with emotions especially if it is just one way. If he can’t or won’t reciprocate your feelings, then sex with him will cause you emotional distress in the long run. I was not always middle age, I too ran through the Hormonal gauntlet with my peers. I know from sad experience that sex is not the way to do it.

Now the guys may say otherwse and there will be some other women that wil say otherwise. But, if you are searching for loopholes, justification and legitimacy on having sex, then you know deep inside it is wrong for you and you will feel lousy if you go against what you hold as right. Don’t do it.

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What makes sexual behaviour any different to other behaviour? Why not apply this principle to all interaction in which case all we can ever do is say ‘this is me’ over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and overand overand overand overand overand overand overand overand over…

Only that would be incredibly dull and a very limited view of the potential of human beings.

23

Still, I wonder if he’d be willing to put you through college . . .

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What’s boring is that society has 4-5 platitudes for any given topic, and the majority of advice one finds from people who should be mentors are these platitudes with slight variations. It also gives the illusion of opposing viewpoints, as in conservative v. liberal, but these are just as contrived as the platitudes taken alone. What is boring is that this person has become so confused by these platitudes that she comes to a philosophy forum to ask people that she doesn’t know, for the sole purpose of obtaining alternate understandings to the trash she finds in her RL surroundings, but then she still gets the same ol’ platitudes. You may find it boring to not call someone a tramp,uptight, or prude based on there sexual behavior, but what I find boring is hearing the same idiotic lines spewed by everyone around me in a boarderline cookie cutter fasion, especially on a topic as personal and varying as sexual behaviorm Where the wealth of knowledge and experience is limited only by the number of people you ask.

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Question: Is it better for a woman to stay a virgin?

Requested clarification: Better for what exact purpose?

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Yep. That is what I would have said.

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I suppose women don’t have the convenience of trivializing sex the way men do.

I must abhor human nature, deep down. I think we’ve spent piles of works in history to romanticize our existence when we’re just a pile of genetic animal drives . . . whom happened to get some good ideas.

28

As Xanderman rightly asked, what do you mean by better? Without specifying, any answer could be engineered:
If the purpose is getting pregnant, then I’d say with confidence that it’s better for a woman to have sex…
If the purpose is catching an STD, unprotected sex would be advised to both genders equally…
…though I can’t think of a scenario where it would be better for a man to have sex (i.e. a purpose exclusive to men).

I ask
a) What’s so special about virginity?
b) What’s the difference between sex for women and sex for men (bar the obvious facts and risks, taboos and prejudices)?

I answer
a) Nothing.
b) Sod all.

29

We do need to define “better”, but we also need to define “virgin”.

Is a lesbian who has never had any sexual relations with any male a virgin? Even if she’s an absolute slut when it comes to women? And the opposite for a gay man. Does it require intercourse? What about oral sex? Anal sex? Mutual masturbation?

Also, regardless of the hymen’s initial breaking and pain, one’s first sexual encounter often sets the tone for later sexual relations, and so if “some random dude” is not going to be satisfactory emotionally, this may set the scene for many unsatisfactory, and potentially unhealthy relationships in the future.

Men are in no way excluded from the above, save for the hymen consideration (obviously).

In regards to better: better for what? What end are we attempting to achieve? Is that end desirable? If so why, and in what way? Or, is it a statement that sex within marriage, and only within marriage, is somehow “inherently” better in some way?

We simply need a hell of a lot more information in regards to what you’re actually asking. Once we’re all on the same page, then we can begin a worthwhile discussion.

My response, prima facie, would be: no. Indeed, to my understanding there are three kinds of sexual relations. There’s fucking (which is purely carnal in nature), sex (which is not wholly carnal, but nor does it require a great degree of intimacy, though some seems to be required), and making love. Making love requires a great degree of intimacy, which should be obvious by the very terminology being used.

In regards to emotional satisfaction, it seems to go:
Making Love > Sex > Fucking.

However, sheer physical gratification can vary widely.

I haven’t the foggiest if this helped, but I did the best with what I had to work with.