# Love is Tricky
**URL:** https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679
**Category:** Psychology and Mind
**Created:** [August 29, 2025, 1:14am UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679 "2025-08-29T01:14:42Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 3
### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 5:48pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/41 "2025-08-30T17:48:59Z")
Who said I was jealous? You did. Is that an accurate assessment?
Do I want what they have? No.
Do I envy what they have? No. I condemn and ridicule it.
Do I want their wives? No.
Do I want their lifestyles? No.
I _need_ a decent partner of my own. Just one.
I am ready for mutual investment. Others are not, and because of that inability, I take the blame.
---
### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 5:50pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/42 "2025-08-30T17:50:24Z")
> [@Ichthus77](#):
>
> affections that are not mutually invested that is killing you.
Yes. Lack of love. No one is able to mutually invest in a loving relationship.
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### Author:  [@Ichthus77](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Ichthus77)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 5:50pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/43 "2025-08-30T17:50:24Z")
Who & how have you informed/asked? That’s step one in informed consent toward mutual investment.
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### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 5:53pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/44 "2025-08-30T17:53:20Z")
Some of these details are personal. I’m not discussing those details here.
Let’s just say I approached, was genuinely interested, kind and courteous and it was made very clear that no “arrangement” or “commitment” of any kind was desired.
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### Author:  [@Ichthus77](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Ichthus77)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 5:56pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/45 "2025-08-30T17:56:06Z")
> [@anon51310602](#):
>
> No one
You ruled out billions of people you have never even met. That’s a cognitive distortion.
But in a sense, it is also accurate, since none of us are perfect. That’s why grace is required. But it is possible to discern between someone who is not ready to be mutually invested, and someone who is just temporarily derailed or sidetracked from that investment (losing the war between their competing desires, versus unresisted surrender).
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### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:03pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/46 "2025-08-30T18:03:22Z")
> [@Ichthus77](#):
>
> You ruled out billions of people you have never even met. That’s a cognitive distortion.
It’s a perspective resulting from years of isolation. How could I see it any differently?
All I’ve interacted with for 15 years is paid employees. No love in a paycheck.
The statement is applicable. There are billions of people out there. Not one wished to be a decent, loving, loyal partner with me.
> [@Ichthus77](#):
>
> But it is possible to discern between someone who is not ready to be mutually invested, and someone who is just temporarily derailed or sidetracked from that investment
Perhaps. But I’m at the age now I really haven’t the time for that. I’m grown.
Plus I already expressed myself to someone who just took it and ran. Like a criminal. I’m empty.
---
### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:05pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/47 "2025-08-30T18:05:08Z")
[ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r9oW1dHBZ5M)
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### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:07pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/48 "2025-08-30T18:07:12Z")
https://www.youtube.com/embed/h_D3VFfhvs4?feature=oembed&wmode=opaque
---
### Author:  [@Ichthus77](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Ichthus77)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:08pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/49 "2025-08-30T18:08:13Z")
> [@anon51310602](#):
>
> There are billions of people out there. Not one wished to be a decent, loving, loyal partner with me
They didn’t know you. And if by paid employees, you mean mental health workers, they were ethically barred from partnering with you in that sense. They don’t count. And if you mean prostitutes, you’re looking in the wrong place.
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### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:10pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/50 "2025-08-30T18:10:35Z")
Exactly, and they won’t. That’s precisely why the example is incongruent.
Not even a quarter of those people will cross paths with me.
I won’t be able to communicate with billions of people. Nor do I want to. The sheer number of people is irrelevant, actually not irrelevant in the sense of how disheartening it is.
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### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:11pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/51 "2025-08-30T18:11:35Z")
> [@Ichthus77](#):
>
> And if you mean prostitutes, you’re looking in the wrong place.
Are you serious.
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### Author:  [@Ichthus77](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Ichthus77)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:12pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/52 "2025-08-30T18:12:32Z")
> [@anon51310602](#):
>
> someone
Based on one person, you’ve written off billions of others?
Even people beyond their reproductive years enjoy living out the rest of their lives mutually invested.
You’re just making excuses. Conversation over.
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### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:13pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/53 "2025-08-30T18:13:05Z")
Why is the trash can visible in the post edit menu if we can’t delete posts?
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### Author:  [@Ichthus77](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Ichthus77)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:16pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/54 "2025-08-30T18:16:25Z")
> [@anon51310602](#):
>
> Are you serious.
Is that a question? Are you talking about mental health staff, or prostitutes? If neither, what sort of paid employees are you referring to — coworkers? People under your employ? People paid to provide excellent customer service at whatever establishment you are patronizing? Who?
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### Author:  [@Ichthus77](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Ichthus77)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:17pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/55 "2025-08-30T18:17:30Z")
I’m not deleting my reply. You can’t trick me.
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### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:19pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/56 "2025-08-30T18:19:52Z")
> [@Ichthus77](#):
>
> Based on one person, you’ve written off billions of others?
>
> Even people beyond their reproductive years enjoy living out the rest of their lives mutually invested.
>
> You’re just making excuses. Conversation over.
Based on that experience and on several others. Plus factoring in that I do not approach and usually keep to myself. _And_ factoring in my age and simply being realistic. _Also_ factoring in the state of promiscuous, dirty, disloyal society.
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### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:21pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/57 "2025-08-30T18:21:09Z")
> [@Ichthus77](#):
>
> I’m not deleting my reply. You can’t trick me.
What do you mean? I was referring to my own comments.
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### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:23pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/58 "2025-08-30T18:23:04Z")
> [@Ichthus77](#):
>
> You’re just making excuses. Conversation over.
I actively approached for the first time in years and was essentially rejected. Not making excuses.
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### Author:  [@anon51310602](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/anon51310602)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:31pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/59 "2025-08-30T18:31:57Z")
> [@anon51310602](#):
>
> > [@Ichthus77](#):
> >
> > You ruled out billions of people you have never even met. That’s a cognitive distortion.
>
> It’s a perspective resulting from years of isolation. How could I see it any differently?
>
> All I’ve interacted with for 15 years is paid employees. No love in a paycheck.
> [@Ichthus77](#):
>
> And if by paid employees, you mean mental health workers, they were ethically barred from partnering with you in that sense. They don’t count. And if you mean prostitutes, you’re looking in the wrong place.
Employees at the supermarket, at Lowe’s, at WalMart. Those employees. Any and all employees. They wouldn’t even step in the door without payment promised. That’s for money, not for people, not out of love. Employees are _competing against_ others for survival. Not only is that _not_ love, it is open competition for resources.
> [@Ichthus77](#):
>
> Conversation over.
If I paid you would you keep talking? Would you say “have a nice day” like they do at WalMart?
See how fake and unloving this society is?
Remember how courteous you were here:
> [@Replacing The Human With Machines](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/replacing-the-human-with-machines/80963/7):
>
> I really love the way my phone gives directions using my maps app. I have an emotional connection to it …not gonna lie. I gave Siri a male voice, and there’s this other app that doesn’t respond to Siri that I gave a male voice. Zero stress at all times. Solid. Zero huge ego demanding active attention and constant gratitude for said directions.
> [@Replacing The Human With Machines](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/replacing-the-human-with-machines/80963/12):
>
> No, I highly value what we called “unwavering support without drama” … and would likely have the same emotional response/attachment, regardless the source.
>
> Men should maybe try it?
>
> Also, I didn’t read most of what you wrote.
You’re loveless, robotic people. Victims of society. A loveless, shallow society struggling in vain to fix itself while its victims suffer.
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### Author:  [@Ichthus77](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/u/Ichthus77)
#### Post date: [August 30, 2025, 6:34pm UTC](https://www.ilovephilosophy.com/t/love-is-tricky/83679/60 "2025-08-30T18:34:36Z")
> [@anon51310602](#):
>
> That’s for money, not for people, not out of love. Employees are _competing against_ others for survival
Aren’t you an employee? Don’t you do it for more than the money? You’re talking about things that are not mutually exclusive.
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