Each person is allowed one sentence, no runons. It must appear like a biblical text. Ready? Here we go.
And there, upon thy altar, the goat did seat with child.
And in all his prowess; all his earthly delights, the rich man remained unsatisfied; propped in the bussom delusion.
And he came upon the city of angels, and thereabouts distributed spam, and there was much rejoicing and exaltation of spam’s glorious flavor and texture.
And then the lord said to him: “he who blames is not blameless, yet blame, shall by nature remain; with me”
Hither came thy wench, with large grains of sand across her brow, and a turnip held abreast.
covet your own turnips you godless communist!
-Imp
Then thy man saideth to the other man; “If one man toucheth one man, and the other touch him back, then god the father will call it even.”
But verily: if they shalt do so whilst naked; the divine father shalt SMITE them most mightily …
And upon the event of such a smiting, there shall be no consumption of sausage or large carrots for 3 days, and each who hath seen the smite shall have the herecy burned from their eyes thrice with molten mercury.
I’m gonna buy me a mercury and cruise it up and down the road…
-Imp