the thought of killing someone is not the same as killing that person. i think we get too frightened when these thoughts come to mind. there is the old saying----you cant go to jail for what you are thinking. i dont think these thoughts are that dangerous.
Thoughts are not dangerous, obsessions with the thoughts are. Hate is a passionate emotion it can easily lead to obsession , not always , not even most of the time. What it does do so very well is eat away at your life. Would you rather think about killing someone you hate or would you rather think of ways to make money to go on that fantastic vacation you dream about? Do you want to think about hate on that vacation? do you want to think about hate when you are with people you love? How about when you are on your honeymoon with the right person? How about when you are driving and you are already so very tired. Hate pops up when you least want it. Some tiny thing can trigger it. A spoon , a drink , a laugh , anything. and that time you are enjoying has been tainted with hate. You suddenly are in a bad mood… girl, it ain’t cool. Let it go.
you are right. maybe getting laid is better.
How about getting better laid??? 
maybe you could be my mother.
Seems to me at the top of this thread you had one and you love her, Why would you ever want another one? i am very flattered though, I do not have a daughter. You would be a fine one.
Depending on the situation you might suffer from Oedipus Complex, else you should describe your relation further, else we only end up in silly guesswork.
Freud was a huge pioneer within psycology, but as pioneer they can’t get everything right, it takes an evolution of trial and error to figure things out. Imo Freud was mostly an idiot, producing elaborate nonsens en masse.