MVP & awards of honor

I think we should give out awards of honor to ilp posters. here are my votes:

MVP of ILP: Pinnacle of Reason
Why: quotes like these…

this is a small sampling, but hats off to you PoR… we’ve had our differences but you are a class act and a promising young man. i see in your posts the arrogance and poise necessary to break down walls in philosophy.

Most Lyrically Inclined: Concordant
Why: magnificent flourishes of rhetoric like this:

honorable mention: Gamer. sorry man, maintain the effort though.

Best Avatar: Sagesound
this one was easy.

Smartest AllRound: arendt
another easy one.

these next ones aren’t really awards, just honorable recognitions.

Longest Posts: Frederick
its a good thing when you have nothing to do you can read your long challenging posts and extensive use of quotes, and really long quotes in some cases. heres a quote by Schopenhauer for you,

“…poverty of mind, confusion and perversity of thought will clothe themselves in the most far-fetched expressions and obscure forms of speech, in order to cloak in difficult and pompous phrases small, trifling, insipid, or commonplace ideas.” - The World as Will and Representation BK3 Paragraph 47

Most Improved:Gamer
i thought i’d throw this one in there. you know. you try hard. i appreciate it.

these are just my votes… feel free to chime in

Okay, so far so good.

I’d like to add another award if I may: Most Misunderstood Poster (MMP):

Future Man.

Why? Here’s some:

  1. Capism
  2. omnisoul
  3. crapitalists

Is he a Nihilist, a Skeptic, or a Pragmatist award goes to: Impenitent.

His acceptance speech.
“Hello and thank you. I admit that I don’t know why I am here, or even, if I am really here. But since I seem to be here let me thank you all again for this award,” waves the award in the air," Not that this means a god damn thing. It means nothing. We are all gonna die, Long live Multi National Corporations!"
Telecast hurriedly switches to commercial for a feminine hygiene product.

We return to see the next presenter list the nominees for,
The most likely to post in the Religion Forum Award:
And the winner is Bob!
His speech.
“Thank you and God Bless. Get it, God Bless! Ha!”
Suddenly a nude Dr. Satanical streaks behind Bob. Time for another commercial break.

We return to learn that The Earth Game Scenario is the least respected forum on the ILP site, as it has garnered that particular award.

Next is the much anticipated Female Poster of the year award.
The nominees are: Arendt, Beenajain, Lenore, She™ and Trix.
Split screen camera shot of all the lovely ladies, each adorned in a beautiful designer gown.
“And the winner is, Trix!”
A look of shock makes its way across the other four faces as Trix launches herself out of her seat and runs for the stage.
A Breathless Trix looks out at the televised audience, her glee apparent. The world prepares for yet another long, rambling, imprecise, and inane diatribe. She begins:
“Was there ever any doubt…”
Suddenly the four other females leap upon Trix, and a catfight ensues. At first, Trix manages to hold them off, as her knowledge of discredited French Philosophers of the Mid 14th Century is indeed quite impressive. However eventually the other girls prove to be too much, and Trix is beaten down and, to the gasps of the audience, her gown is ripped off, revealing what many of us knew all along, Trix does, in fact, have a penis!

Time for yet another commercial break.

that must be someone impersonating me… pretending to be delighted that I made it in the list of ‘female’ nominees…

…and Trix doesn’t even show up for the awards ceremony… instead she delivers her acceptance speech live via satellite…

but, since I don’t know her, I haven’t exactly earned the right to put words in her mouth…

yawn I know, but I must stop there.

You like your satire tinged with constricting realism. I am feeling ya.

Though it be said that I may be too humble to accept such an honor, I must still admit my artistic tastes have at least enhanced the aesthetics of this forum at some degree or another. So does the I who is me accept an honor given to the name that belongs to him who is I?

You bet your ass I do.

In accordance with everyone else’s posts, I’d like to give a couple awards…to the last bitter drop…

Most Incoherent: golden arm (assuming he still exists here…)

Most Paranoid: geral sosbee (even if he no longer exists on these forums)

it was well deserved Sage, as far as i am the judge of such things

so being this posted in early january i assume these are the 2004 ILP Awards, brought to you by MTV (just like every other damn awards show in the last 50 years) and Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure (for philosophizing with So-crates via lyrics)

Loving this thread!

The Most Readable Poster (MRP):

award goes to…

DUNAMIS.

I thank the academy, that is ILP, for bringing out the best in me…

Thank god I shaved everything that night, 'cuz I wasn’t wearing anything under that beautiful gown. :blush: :stuck_out_tongue: :wink:

HUBBA HUBBA!
Not even the black silk thong? :stuck_out_tongue:

No. So I grabbed the statuette and tried to cover myself with it–down or up, don’t know.

Umm you weren’t stripped, Trix was… uggg lol.

You’ve got to re-write the script then. haha. Btw, Trix was wearing a bustier, and a support. :blush:

No can’t do that. The narrative requires a shemale to be stripped… that’s Trix. :stuck_out_tongue:

what kind of filth have you muddied this thread with!

for shame on both of you.

also, as i said in another post, i retract the honorable mention i gave to Gamer.

:laughing:

And the award for the most ambiguously sacrcastic poster goes to (the speaker pauses for dramatic effect as the silence within the hall seems to expand in anticipation) the artist Monooq. He earned the right to this award for posts such as these.

“and zenofeller, i shamed you so badly i’m surprised you still post here.”

“let me just say you will all feel the full fury of my rath, soon. especially you arendt, who’s total disrespect and lack of respect is… hmm.
you are all going down.”

“just to reiterate before i unleash on a number of you… i will put a number of you to shame, such shame as you will never post here again. ask not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee.”

Absolutely hilarious Monooq. I applaud you.

On to the other awards:
The award for the poster who has caused me to get out of my chair and walk away from the computer because I am laughing so hard, goes to none other than Gate Control Theory.

The award for most humble and profound, goes to Xanderman.

I now pass the podium to someone else.

Just wondering where I can find this exact quote to know what topic it was in reference to. It’s so funny, I’d love to know for what everyone was going to go down for.