what are ya’ll folk doin to ring in the next new year?
bumpin ass parties?
…getting laid. 
nice. good work. did you read the manual?
getting laid…
be one with the mortar…
-Imp
I am the manual…
Mrs. Chastity Whimpett’s Helpful and Concise Guide to Carnal Knowledge, Fornication and Other Assorted Naughtiness is always a favorite.
While some prefer The Big Book of Banging, Balling and Boffing By Belinda Bollenstein
For those who have a religious background there is always The Catholic Girl’s Guide to Sex by MELINDA ANDERSON
Or
Real Questions, Real Answers About Sex: The Complete Guide To Intimacy As God Intended by Louis, Dr. McBurney
Or
Single Jewish Female: A Modern Guide to Sex and Dating by Leah Furman
Our old friend Hermes was fond of The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women by Tristan Taormino
For those who enjoy the classics there is:
Love, Sex and Marriage in Ancient Greece: A Guide to the Private Life of the Ancient Greeks by Nikolaos A. Vrissimtzis
or
Classic Nasty: More Naughty Bits : A Rollicking Guide to Hot Sex in Great Books, from the Iliad to the Corrections by Jack Murnighan
Those younger members might enjoy The Horny Teenagers Guide to Sex by P. Bragg
For the Oedipally inclined there is: The Dead Father’s Guide to Sex and Marrieage by John Scott Shepard
For those with a lawyerly bent, or those who might be concerned about what they are doing: A Guide to America’s Sex Laws by Richard A. Posner, Katharine B. Silbaugh
For the ambitious there is always: Kung Fu Love: the Superior man’s guide to High Performence Sex by Robert Dreeben
For the old fashioned there is: A Farm Boy’s Guide to Love and Sex by Kal Rissman
One of my favorites is The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus: How to Go Down on a Woman and Give Her Exquisite Pleasure by Violet Blue
What about Sex Education: An Islamic Perspective by Shahid Athar?
That Catholic Girl’s Guide to Sex is disturbing…the back cover shows a pic of the two women Melinda Anderson and Kathleen Murray…they look like they’ve been fucked in the ass by Jesus too much. I noticed something really odd though in that book. There’s small quiz-questionaires that act like tidbits of Catholic Television Programming inside a book. One segment called WordPlay asked to define Agnostic, giving two choices. The second choice is rediculously stupid, giving youngling Catholics the closest logical choice of the only available answer. This book proclaims agnostics as “people who doubt the existence of God.”
During and since my time as an agnostic, I was and still am very resolute about keeping the fine line clear between the definition of an aethiest and an agnostic.
It’s crap literature like this that makes me wish there was a commandment that said “thou shalt not lie, no matter how harmful the truth may be.”
Forgive my oversight, all you Islamic lovers out there.
Isn’t there already a commandment about deception?
are these real books?
Yes indeed 86% of them are real fucking (in every sense of the word) books.
… 
…back on topic…
…I’ll end up spending the daylight hours of New-Year’s Eve removing the Christmas decorations from my Elderly grandma’s house.
After that, she (my grandma) has made reservations at her country/golf club for us to have dinner.
…at least this is the plans as I’ve been informed. 
I think it would make more sense if the year began in Spring, not the dead of Winter. Therefore, I’m not celebrating, which has nothing (fingers crossed) to do with the fact that I have to work.
I am also at work today.
Shit, finally someone realizes and appreciates how things should be!! It would make so much sense to have a year built around the 12 Signs of the Zodiac. The year would end on the first day of spring, March 20th, which is the last day of the Piscean Month. (It’s interesting how that works out, the first day of winter, December 21st, was the day before the Capricorn Month.) So keep your fingers crossed She till March 21st when the astrological calender reverts to the begining with the Arian Month, day one!
The Four Seasons
Spring = Season of Water = Aries, Taurus, Gemini
Summer = Season of Fire = Cancer, Leo, Virgo
Fall = Season of Earth = Libra, Scorpio, Saggitarius
Winter = Season of Air = Capricorn, Aquarius, Pisces
The Astrological Calendar
Arian Month, 31 Days = March 21 - April 20
Taurian Month, 30 Days = April 21 - May 20
Geminian Month, 31 Days = May 21 - June 20
Cancerian Month, 31 Days = June 21 - July 21
Leoan Month, 32 Days = July 22 - August 22
Virgian Month, 32 Days = August 23 - September 23
Libran Month, 29 Days = September 24 - October 22
Scorpion Month, 30 Days = October 23 - November 22
Saggitarian Month, 29 Days = November 23 - December 21
Capricorn Month, 29 Days = December 22 - January 19
Aquarian Month, 30 Days = January 20 - February 18
Piscean Month, 30 Days = February 19 - March 20
Sagesound
Why not base the end of the year at the Winter Solstice? That is when the Light stops dying. We could also celebrate Sow and Reap at the Equinoxes. Or have we gotten to far from our agricultural roots?
Whatever floats your boat man, I came up with that system for a number of reasons, most of them being inspirational from my lovely witch, who happens to be an Aries…
i pity you fous that have to work.
tonight is the eve of battle. and also new years.
Sage:
You know I hear there used to be a thirteenth month before the calendar system was rearranged, which sorta throws the balance of the zodiac all outta’ wack.
I’m a Capricron/Tiger with six planets in Aquarius. Gemini is my rising. Wood is my element.
I like Cancers, Virgos, and if I can convince an Aries that they can never out do me, I like them too.
we need to use the Mayan calendar…
the planet has seven years at best…
-Imp
Actually it’s interesting you mention that because there’s a 13th Zodiac Sign that is not recognized nor is it really observed. Ophiuchus, which stretches across Scorpio’s and Saggitarius’ area, has no real definable attributes and is shrouded in rumors. There have been times in the past where there were 36 or 18 or even 6 signs recognized and observed at a given time. The 12-Sign Zodiac system, or Greeco-Roman System is much more simplified than that of old confusing Babylonian or Hindu systems.
The 12-month system is the most practical usually from its applications applied to the Lunar System as seen in the Muslim Calendar, and seasonal occurances we expirience…three months per season times four seasons equals 12 months of orderly predictable weather. The Gregorian Calendar, which I despised, is a rip-off of the Julian Calendar with a few changes. I find it funny how the Roman-inspired months were never changed to a more Xtian-religious orientation.
I’m not too fond of the Chinese Zodiac because of its conflicting attributes with western astrological thought. For example, two people of the same sign having completely different Chinese animals attributed to them. To elaborate, you’re a Capricorn/Tiger, but I’m a Capricorn/Rooster. It doesn’t really work out. One thing we do have in common as Capricorns is we both tend to be specific with details, and along with that, it makes me happy to know that I’m not the only Cappy around here.