o u t o f c o n t ro l

why does my life feel so out of control?

i am 16, in year 11 at high school but recently dropped out due to severe anxiety and depression. i am intelligent (i am starting to doubt this, but was in the advanced classes/did well and such).

i am about to undertake a TAFE course in accounting and a trying to find a job in that area.

i have not met anyone who can relate to or sincerely understands my problem. i also believe i have binge eating disorder. the constant binge-eating has been steadily worsening since i was 14.

i don’t think i had any major problems to start with; all my problems appear on the surface to be self-inflicted.

what i want to know is: how did these problems develop seemingly out of nothing (is it something to do with the subconscious?), how come others do not seem to have the same thing and why does it all feel so uncontrollable?


You need to see some help. Phyciatric evaluation maybe.

Don’t feel bad. I went to rehab when I ws 14 and again when I was 16 and on probation. Then I got kicked out of school and took an equivalency test for my diploma. Then for about 4 years I roamed the US and took off to a few places in Europe on money that I made doing questionable things. Then I sued a lady for two years who hit me with a truck almost killing me and got enough money to go to college. Now I work in a research facility coming up with new ways to make researchers more ethical. You can be 16 and do whatever the hell you want. Just don’t die or get pregnant. Life will go on, things will get better, and as long as you never settle you’ll always eventually get to have things your way.

It’s the fricking hormones. I’d recommend watching the classic Star Trek episode “Amok Time”, as it’s cool and deals with this.