Are human beings the only creatures that expirience sexual frustration or the lack of mating?
It seems all other creatures may expirience the loss of a encounter but usually such things don’t last too long for a animal because where there is a loss another opportunity presents itself for a animal quite quickly.
Human beings however not only expirience the loss of a encounter but can expirience never mating at all or years upon years of waiting.
I don’t think animals deal with sexual frustration because they don’t see as much of it on tv.
When I’m up late at night and five different stations are playing previews of girls gone wild, I have to admit that bouncing tits and drunken whores increase my uh…desire to…uh…you get it.
Even if dogs had “bitches gone wild”, and felt the same sensation that I feel upon viewing girls gone wild, I could overcome my frustration, where they may not be able to, because of my opposable thumbs.
My personal feeling is that anytime one is not fucking, one is caught in the deepest dread and panic; it is only by an act of extreme repression that one is able to go on without buckling over and writhing in horror.
TREATMENT OPTIONS:
There is of course a well known and time tested treatment option to the problem of sexual frustration, it is free and gives about fifteen minutes of relief. Coitus may provide relief of a slightly longer duration --though not by much. Some claim more lasting relief from Anxiolytic medications. A more lasting solution would be to simply cut out the offending growth with a sterilized cutting instrument, or to contract a surgeon to perform this operation --properly removed by a qualified surgeon, there is little risk that the protuberance will grow back.
Its our chemical makeup, desiring what we cant have. If you could have sex all the time, it wouldnt be a big deal. Since women make it so difficult its something we strive to acheive, and Makes us happy when we accomplish it. Sex works just like drugs do, activates Endorphins.
Another reason could be the fact it just FEELS good. Alot of the time the person isnt physically addicted, but mentally. This happens alot with pot. Your get addicted to the feeling more than the drug. You just want to feel good more often.
Frued had mentioned that social advancement was based on sex, the translation of this was very crude because if you read on further he goes to explain that by directing or binding our sexual energies, ie sexual frustrations, to constructive work we are able to create things for the benafit of socioty as a whole rather than personal survival.
wether or not their is ant practical evidance to support this I am unsure, but statistically the most prude cultures seem to be the ones with the greatest speed of advancement, while those with open sexuality often do not advance unless out of need.
under this argument we experiance sexual frustration for the good of social growth, and to this my oppion is screw socioty, no pun intended.
what does the word “advancing” means to those cultures? Advancing in technology, advancing in longer life spans, advancing in overusing our resourses and slowly killing our planet?
I think freud is also again making a mistake trying to prove causation by correlation.
advancment as in the relative concept, and frued did not look too kindly on this, he beleived that by doing so we created our own inner turmoil and so he was none too fond of the concept. Since direct experiments on humans is impossible one must simply follow statistics so you have little choice but to “try to prove causation by correlation”
As for frued, neither you nor I have the right to critasize him since a number of his more contrivercial concepts have become common knowledge since his passing, including the presance of the unconsious mind, which in the early 1900’s was completly unherd of.
frueds introduction to psychoanalysis is a good way to look back and see the type of diffrinces he had to face in his time, I’d class it as book that you must read the first chapter at the very least.
As for the concepts of advancement, I share your sinacism for what is commonly accepted, however plain sinacism will do no justice to changing the world into something more stable. Ghandi - “be the change you wish to see in the world.”
so do you wish to see a world of people who are scinical or one of people who seek resolution.
We should be talking mainly about frustration,
As a general principal.
Frustration.
What’s that like?
When desire and situation are sharply out of contrast.
No desire? No frustration.
Sexual frustration is situational.
Only certian kinds of situations produce a frustrating disharmony between desires and actualities.
Organic individuals continually alter the natural & original state of their surroundings, and are not content with things un-altered by their own desires/hungers.
All beings on earth experience frustration of some sort or another, when they are separated in any degree from the conditions which they strive towards, and then, the inner friction leads to conscious chain reactions, eventually resulting in hard physical effort.
Without “sexual frustration”, there would be no selectiveness, no sexual agression… No sexual quality or quantity.
If only a few people get to mate, and those people are of higher quality, that’d lead to progressive evolution [instead of degeneration], and that would qualify as eugenic (yaay).
“The great object is sensation—to feel that we exist. It is the craving void which drives us to travel to intemperate but keenly felt pursuits of every description whose principal attraction is the agitation inseparable from their accomplishment.” ~ George Gordon, Lord Byron
Yes, good points. Much of society nowadays suffers from sensation addiction.
I first learned about the topic of sensation addiction through my Buddhist practice.
My Buddhist practice reminds me to be mindful of the present moment and not escape from it by abusing the senses.
What is the hallmark of an addict?
One who refuses to accept what is by abusing the senses to escape from the present moment.
All our addictions have pleasure aspects within them and we get rewards for participating in them in the form of euphoric experiences. Euphoric experience can be related to the spiritual as well.
The definition of a religious mystic is one that partakes in an altered state of conciseness with God / god or the spiritual realm. Our addictions also give us this altered state of consciousness and feeling of euphoria.
So, we can say that our drugs are our gods and our addiction is our religion.
There is a reason to our madness - it is not just pure madness as most addicts think.
Some persons I run into feel guilty for having senses. They get super sensitized to anything that affects them. They do not look at the senses as a gift from a higher power, instead look at them as a curse.
Coming to peace with our senses and learning to enjoy them - but not abuse them is the answer. And for those looking for an excuse to continue addiction, do not look upon this post as an excuse to keep using your drug of choice. If you missed my previous post “The 7 Benefits Addictions Provide Us” and want a copy write me.
From: How to Want What You Have:
“People who dedicate their lives to the pursuit of sensual pleasure find that the more pleasure they get, the more they want. Small, ordinary pleasures soon lose their power to please and must be replaced with more intense or exotic ones. Heedless sensualists usually meet a bad end. They learn the hard way that their desires are relentless and insatiable.”
We are spiritual beings residing in a physical body and must balance this fact. The Buddha recognized this as he gave up being an ascetic himself in favor of the middle path, a path of moderation which rejected both sensory indulgence as well as extreme mortification.
If we want peace with this subject it all revolves around whether or not you are abusing your senses and does not revolve around the fact that you have senses that nature provided you with.
Try asking if the activity placing unreasonable demands on my time and energy, will it place me in legal jeopardy or endanger my mental, physical or spiritual health? You see, there never will be a shortage of ways that humans can find to abuse the mind or the body by living a life of extremes.
The important question is how to find a balance between the mind and the body to be at peace in the present. So, don’t feel guilty about having senses or desires, just work on not abusing them.
Once I started to practice mindfulness of the present moment, this practice opened up a new area of sense enjoyment by just being present. Drugs took me away from the present and I was anything but aware of my real senses. In fact, my senses were dulled from being drugged up. I liked the artificial sense of euphoria I received from various drugs, but this euphoria was not sustainable, natural or healthy. Sustainability and health aspects are both areas I now use to judge things that affect my senses.
If you look into your own addictive areas, you can see how your drug of choice affected your senses and how your were not necessarily addicted to the drug - you were addicted to the sensation the drug provided. This is where sensation addiction comes in. Without receiving these sensations our drug loses it luster. Sensation of the mouth, genitals, brain - addiction all revolves around sensations and how we respond to them.
“I drink to keep body and soul apart” ~ Oscar Wilde
While talking with a sex addict, he once asked me if I thought sex was a need?
Sex a need?
It all revolves around what the word ‘need’ means to you.
No sex, it is not a life and death need.
But yes, sex is a a basic, instinctual need in most people that can disturb one’s peace…even if gratified and as well as if not gratified in.
So it is hard to come to peace with sex, no matter how you slice it.
The best one can do is make sex somewhat less peace disrupting.
Sex is crazy business for sure.
I am always amazed each spring when I take walks around a local lake that has a large duck population. I see four male ducks surround a female to pin her down and take turns having sex with her all the while biting the feathers off her neck and head.
They all seem to be driven and squawking loudly all the while. If they were humans, the males would get 20 years in jail most likely for such behavior. In any case, it is natures way … with ducks at least.
Below is a snip on the subject of praying mantis sexual practice (condensed) Or, skip this paragraph and get to my post if not interested. But, this paragraph just illustrates that all species have to deal with the same issues as humans more or less when it comes to sex…craziness and peace disruption.
As the Taoist say…fleas come with the dog. so forget 100% peace if you are talking about participating in sex and forget 100% peace as well if you are thinking celibacy (unless you are dead to natures sex drive altogether.)
But celibates do have the ‘possibility’ of more peace than the sex addict that gratifies all their desires.
This possibility is so since sexual stimulation produces chemicals in the brain and body, so the sex addict is on a constant high, whereas the celibate is hopefully less drugged up.
But nature gives us some sex hype for free, so either way we can get drunk from our own efforts or from outside sources that are mostly beyond our control…the addict just helps nature with manufacturing more drugs internally around the clock.
From : How to Want What You Have:
“People who dedicate their lives to the pursuit of sensual pleasure find that the more pleasure they get, the more they want. Small, ordinary pleasures soon lose their power to please and must be replaced with more intense or exotic ones. Heedless sensualists usually meet a bad end. They learn the hard way that their desires are relentless and insatiable.”
Written by Patrick O’Brian on the subject of Sexual Practices of the Praying Mantis
Stephen watch the male mantis step cautiously towards the female mantis. In three strides he was upon her; his legs gripped her wing-covers; his antennae found hers and began to stroke them and copulation began.
After a few minutes the female moved her triangular head pivoting it from left to right, then I there was a blur of movements so rapid that for all his care and extreme attention he could not follow them, and the males head was off, clamped there, a detached lemon, under the crook of her green praying arms.
She bit into it, and the eye’s glow went out; on her back the headless male continued to copulate rather more strongly than before; all his inhibitions having been removed. Ten minutes later the female took off three pieces of her mate’s long thorax and ate them with every appearance of appetite, dropping a few crumbs in front of her.
The male copulated on, still firmly anchored by his back legs. Stephen thought to himself, “You do not need a head, nor even a heart, to be all a female can require.” (end)
Animals are interesting to study when the subject turns to sex. we sometimes think that we are the only ones crazed with such feelings. for more on this subject
Being hyped up is a byproduct of sex. One goes with the other, so no use beating yourself up over it.
The nature of the beast with sex is to get excited, so this is what makes it tougher addiction than food and spending, as we can eat or spend and still be devoid of most of the excitement from these areas if we wish. But in general, we cannot participate in sexual activity without getting excited.
In addition, it takes a day or two for some of us to go back to normal from sex, so this refractory period is another area to deal with whenever we get hyped up sexually. Is this refractory period bad? No, it is just how things are.
The problem with addicts, whether sexual addicts or otherwise, is they overdo things to a point of pain - that is what’s bad.
In reality, sex is never perfect and it always needs to be adjusted somewhat.
And just by being married is not a free pass to abusing sex stimuli all the times either, as I have tendency to do.
It is no different from thinking you can drink all the time cause you own a whisky factory or eat rich food all the time if you are a four star restaurant owner.
All our actions produce consequences and many of these actions will produce consequences that destroy our peace if we are not mindful of them.
“Just as a life of virtue yields its own reward, a life of vice yields its own punishment” - Plutarch
Perfection with sex?
This is where most addicts fail.
Where judgments have to be made, mistakes can and will happen.
Forget perfection - look for direction. There are 3 directions we can take in life - we can get better, get worse or stay the same.
Sexual Compulsives Anonymous gives us some guidelines: Is the activity placing unreasonable demands on my time and energy, will it place me in legal jeopardy or endanger my mental, physical or spiritual health?
Even Yahweh, the God of the Hebrews had sex on ‘his, her or it’s’ mind when God told the Hebrews.
“Now therefore kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him. But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves.” Numbers 31:17-18
Is sex overated? I ain’t never done no junk, but my friend said it could be. It is frustrating not knowing, but it ain’t all they cook it up to be right?
I heard on the radio shows that most women rarely or never orgasm during intercourse, so how can it be so great? I’m sure the mental high and the physical part for guys is not bad though.
Is there frustration because of a lack of it, or just the drive?
Are other people frustrated because they can’t be with their crush, or is that more of love or something? I’m so confused about this stuff. It’s the final frontier. Chicks are wierd, different. Passing by the clothing in a dept. store is like alien junk. They aren’t that different, yet they are. I don’t have any sisters, so I dunno what’s goin on. I can’t even tell body language, or read any clues, or even tell normal language. They’re pretty random and spuratic too.
forcing people is only done for folks who are detached from love. You seduce those you love, and they seduce you back, and then both partners want to please each other, instead of one being submissive and limp, and the other dominating.
I long for the time in the future, when the law get’s less strict about bonking men over the head who mistreat women. Nowadays, women can have guns, and hopefully they’ll bonk a bullet into the heads of men who don’t deserve their play stick.