…and I’m seducing a very young foreign exchange student at my college, because she’s easy prey.
I don’t even know what’s wrong with me, but lately when I try to go to sleep, I have these immense flashes in my head before I’m about to fall unconscious. I can’t really tell if I’m going to have a stroke or if it’s like a warning sign for it or something. Or, maybe I have a tumor. I don’t know; I doubt those things. But I do know that I am going mentally insane. I suppose people can discount what I’m saying around here pretty easily then, now. I don’t really know what to do about this. I imagine that it has to do with me not eating very much and doing no exercise for weeks, since I can’t really afford food right now. It’ll be at least a couple weeks before I can.
Just rambling, if anybody has some advice for my situation, then I’d appreciate it. And NO I am not going to medicate myself, except maybe with alcohol wherever I can get my hands on it. In due time…
And once I can afford my alcoholism, then rest assured, you will see the end of me around here. So pay me so I can leave!
P.S. I’m making wine, so that’s a good start I guess.
RU, you need to eat, supplement your diet with going to churches or such that feed the hungry. Some have pantries that will give you food to cook and other serve meals. Do not let pride make you ill. You are under pressure and stress. This affects our physical body. You need to keep it fed during such times. Hang in there, we all lose control from time to time.
RealUnoriginal being insane would explain much. That is, with this additional information, previous events follow more logically, are more easily understood.
Me too. For about the last twelve years. It is called “night terror,” or is atleast a closely related disorder. I believe it has to do with the ego losing control as the mind gives up consciousness and the dread which lies just below the surface (for philosophers especially) comes welling up. I sit up in bed, gasp, the terror disipates; the horror may or may not be accompanied by a vision. You can read up here,
It can be treated with minor-tranquilizers, but inlight of the philosophical value of the visions that often accompany the terror, I would suggest not taking pharmacuticals to stop it.
)
Yea your pride can do that to people not just you. :-" :-" :-" 
Ok that was part of what I am returning in gratitude 
