Sunday Times

Creative Forums Creative Writing
1

Have the Sunday Times
Stupidly expensive coffee
Clean sheets
Brushing crumbs off absentmindedly

Quiet Coltrane
And the wind in the trees
Smell of frizzled muffins
Flannel

She reads, her hair wet from the bath
The rain blows around the yard
We drink our coffee
I never let on

Noon passes
We share the puzzle
We puzzle over the sharing
No - I do

We don’t make love
Except we do
We do nothing
But it’s everything I ever wanted

She reads ads to me
And smiles
Because I listen
She knows

She falls asleep on my shoulder
And I am left to wonder

2

Wow, I like this. I like this a lot.

3

Shit, rainey. Coming from you, that’s high praise indeed. Glad you enjoyed it. That’s why I posted it.

4

edit

5

Home Run.

No, grand slam.

6

It seems to me I remember something said about a soft underbelly. This sinks you boat faust. I hope at some time down the road you can think about changing the last line to, “I am left in wonder.”, not to make the poem better; just due to different circumstances.

7

Great…you convey the setting and mood perfectly…an early morning start…and all these little thoughts and emotions are lurking about this poem so clearly…

loved this line: I never let on

gald you posted faust!
:wink:

8

Thanks, Gobbo. It’s my first time at bat for a “serious” poem.

DEB - I almost did write it that way. But it can be read that way, now, I think - both ways at once. But I’ve said too much already.

Colin - you’ve managed to identify the alternate title.

9

Faust, this is one of the best poems I have read by any ILP member since I joined a month ago now - congradulations on a great poem.

lhw - AKA: The Straight-faced Clown AKA: M.C. Tape-Hiss

10

It is kaleidoscopic faust. As I ‘turn’ the poem I hesitate a little longer at:

We don’t make love
Except we do
We do nothing
But it’s everything I ever wanted

11

lhw - I humbly thank thee.

DEB - yes. Feel free to read any or all of this more than one way - that’s how it was written. A young perspectivist in love. I am glad that you are enjoying it.

12

Rarely do we find poetry in just living. This is one of them. A quiet mundane every day living full of real meaning. Living presented as itself, not poetry of living as.

Thanks faust.

13

Thank you, tent. That’s where I find most of the poetry I find.

14

I didn’t like it at all. I absolutely loved it.

15

Tks, sweetie. Thought you might dig it, if anyone did.

16

You got that right. I even saved it on my computer.

17

faust-- you captured a sweet moment, that though simple in action, is so full of life. some of my more pleasant moments with my love were spent lying in bed reading to each other.

this is really beautiful and i’m glad that you posted it :slight_smile:

18

This poem reminded me of a scene from Stardust Memories, where Woody Allen is looking at his lover (forget her name) on a Sunday morning, and she is reading a magazine while he is doing a crossword puzzle in the New York Times: she looks up at him and smiles, and he, smiling back, says in a voiceover that that, is as perfect as any moment can get. That was happiness, claims Allen.

Your poem, conveys much of the same. As I had already been deeply moved by that scene from Stardust Memories, I could not help but be taken back there in your poem - making it really a, if you will, tangible experience. I loved your title - it is very strong, and the word play in it is magnificent. You’re a very talented writer Faust, that is quite apparent. Now, how deep will you go? You got the talent, now show us your depths - if you dare.

19

Thank you, btrfly and UM. Your kind words are appreciated, as are all those so far expressed. I haven’t seen that movie, UM. Perhaps I shall, now. As for another poem, I have no idea if I have another in me. I just got home last night and dashed it off. We’ll see.

20

The sign of a great poem is one that you can’t stop reading and one that the reader keeps finding new subtleties thru additional readings - this is one of those poems for me. Great job faust - got anything new cookin ‘cuz I’m jonzin’?

lhw - AKA: The Stright-faced Clown AKA: M.C. Tape-Hiss