Sorry for the mammoth post, I didn’t want to paper any cracks. You can skip to the question in bold, but much of what i’ve written gives my response to it and I’d appreciate some criticism.
My friend and I were discussing about how people talk to one another and we realised that there are plenty of things we might avoid or stumble over in regular conversation. There are some things that most people avoid doing, talking about, or thinking about. With every example we struggled to find logical reasons why everyone avoids them- when we applied logic, we found that the reasoning behind our views were widely unsound. I feel like openly discussing them has changed my outlook.
In many cases, WHO you are discussing or performing these taboos in front of determines how you approach (or hide from) them. For example I would not feel comfortable discussing sexual experiences with my parents, nor would I feel comfortable hearing about their own. However, this would be absolutely fine with my friends. Why?
Personally, I’ve arrived at concepts of repression/projection which are fairly close to Freud’s. After thinking about it for a while it seemed to us that about 90% of our taboos came back to repression. On at least a subconscious level, almost everyone is concerned about whether they’re conforming to what is normal so as not to attract negative attention or disapproval from others- we felt that we did this mostly as the result of a desire to conform or to avoid seeming sexually unattractive? Many people strongly believe in certain taboos being ‘wrong’, yet when we look at it in a relativist manner we see that almost all of them have been acceptable in other cultures at some point historically- for example, homosexual practices were common place for most people in Ancient Greece and incest was a normal aspect of religious ceremony in Ancient Egypt. Perhaps we’re mistaking opinions for facts when we condemn things such as sexual permissiveness and nudity.
The question this brings is:
[size=150]Are taboos real, practical and defendable or should we all just ‘loosen up’ and regard them as lightly as we regard everything else?[/size]
To give you some ideas of what the hell I’m on about, here’s a list of the sort of things we felt we couldn’t easily talk about in less open conversations.
What I’d really like is for you to ask yourself ‘why’ for each elaboration- is it just because you’re irrationally against it or are there real justifiable reasons for maintaining them as unacceptable?
Sex- People are often afraid to discuss it with those who are much older/younger than themselves or members of their family. Sex is almost never shown on TV during hours of the day during when children may be watching. Generally, having sex is considered something that should be done privately and something which should be discussed privately. Showing explicit sexual scenes (i.e. close-ups or genuine sex between characters) on screen is commonly considered inappropriate. I cannot see why this is.
Sexual Perversion- Homosexuality, incest (in this case, I mean in a non-reproductive sense) and fetishes are just a few examples of what almost nobody would normally discuss openly, commit to or claim to feel a tendency for when in an ordinary conversation with someone they’d just met. People are afraid of seeming sexually non-conformist. Again, is there a defendable reason for this?
Bodily Health- If I had a sexually transmitted infection I would be unwilling to discuss it with most of my family and friends? Is this just squeamishness?
Nudity- Again, is this illegal simply because of squeamishness? Why is it unacceptable to walk down the street without clothes?
Excrement- Why is passing wind in the company of others considered impolite? Why are we unkeen to discuss our urinal or bowel movements?
Swearing- Why is swearing not allowed in playgrounds or on daytime television?
Drugs- Is the availability of alcohol and tobacco defendable? Should allowing them warrant the legalisation of other, less harmful and less addictive substances such as cannabis, LSD and Magic Mushrooms? Why are we often unwilling to admit we have experimented with drugs to others?
Racial Terms/Suggestions of Racism- Why is acceptable for a black person to refer to someone as a ‘nigger’ in an affectionate or friendly manner but not acceptable for a white to do the same? The same question applies to most slang racial terms.