see below
OK, so I’ve assembled a list of great names (which is by no means complete) just for the sake of spreading some light on a number of spiritual questions that would no doubt have intrigued Nietzsche.
The Buddha: The most boring of these guys.
Hermann Hesse: Owner of the world’s biggest closet.
The Hand of Koran: Could you have a bigger chip on your shoulder?
The Evil Sorcerer: He did have a bigger chip on his shoulder.
Friedrich Nietzsche: The guy who knew everything.
Gilles Deleuze: The guy who knew more than Nietzsche.
Stephen Metcalf: Nietzsche on crack.
Jesus: The best that could be (although he died too young- he could have become better).
Eli’jah: The Jewish spirit become man in an impossible fashion.
H.P. Baxxter: The best in Europe now.
The list explained:
Hermann Hesse: Author of the book Steppenwolf (amongst others). He displayed a great knowledge of the Self in his writings, although one might ask why he never wrote a bona fide philosophy book. A clear example of what Felix Guattari calls a ‘(closet) homosexual genius’ (Three Billion Perverts on the Stand, The Guattari Reader, Blackwell Publishers Limited, 1996, p185).
The Hand of Koran: Or what believers like to call, the Hands of Koran- but in my mind only a well-enlightened individual could write such an exquisite text. It seems to me that he must have had a big gripe with Christianity- but I may be wrong.
Friedrich Nietzsche: Author of a number of books including the best two in the history of mankind: the spiritual opus Thus Spoke Zarathustra (‘the greatest gift mankind has ever been given it’) and The Anti-Christian, in which he thoroughly exposes the subterranean ways of the priest. These two books alone place Nietzsche far above all other widely known authors.
Gilles Deleuze: Although largely long-winded and tedious, errors are almost impossible to find in Deleuze’s work. No doubt his greatest academic achievement was to completely dismember psychoanalysis with the aid of Felix Guattari. Regarding Deleuze’s massive influence upon his contemporaries, fellow French philosopher Michel Foucault once publicly stated: ‘Perhaps one day the 20th century will be known as Deleuzian’.
Stephen Metcalf: Co-author, translator and editor of Hammer of the Gods, Stephen’s style has a hard edge that Nietzsche’s work always lacked. With an avid tendency to deploy the air of the heights with concepts not even found in Nietzsche’s own writings, Stephen is beyond doubt eons ahead of your average Nietzsche-believer.
Eli’jah: The most powerful prophet in the Old Testament and found at the beginning of The Second Book of Kings, Eli’jah brought death upon three seperate groups of un-chosen Jews over the course of a few hours by way of awesome spectacles (in the form of holy fire from the heavens). However, the impossibility of several of the events described means that, without any doubt, his story is to a significant extent fabricated.
H.P. Baxxter: The self-proclaimed “quarterback of the (rave) scene”, Baxxter employs his genius in producing thoroughly Dionysian pop-hardcore techno music as part of the European group Scooter. Although his academic credentials may be dubious, the magnitude of his spiritual knowledge is undeniably gargantuan.
To be continued… (perhaps)
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Talking to yourself now, chief?