The Heroic Model for Men

Do we continue to train our boys to be heroic
no matter what they might be fighting for?

I think this stinks when you consider what older guys can think up to fight about.

There is a place for the hero but not in some of the shit we have gotten into.

I guess the issue with heroic models for men is that men aren’t anymore behind the models. For instance, kids that play “guitar hero” don’t imitate men but their pc and at the end, they cannot play guitar in reality. If they had spent as much time on a real guitar, they would have been able to play music as real musicians.

IMO not many people train boys to be heroic. Heroism has become a trait of superhero’s and soldiers, and Average Joe doesn’t even know what it means anymore.

The average Joe was never a hero. That’s why heroes are such a big deal. If you’re talking about soldiers, that’s not so much heroism as it is testosterone poisoning.

You don’t believe in it, but heroism is in us. Have you ever observed little kids when they play? They play as if they were their heroes and indeed think they are. Adults resign themselves not to believe in their “super-egos” and project themselves in other substitutives “heroes”. Only the ones that haven’t cut themselves from their ancient belief, do succeed in life. And they are generally still kids.

:laughing: I agree with you about the soldiers thing.

The average Joe has the opportunity to be a hero at least once a week. One needn’t save a person from a burning building to be considered a hero.

Average Joe might, say, push his cart full of groceries aside and, with a friendly smile, let the girl behind him who only has one item budge ahead, and think nothing of it, but to the girl — well, maybe she was on her way to the hospital because her mom got into a car accident and had to have surgery, and she just stopped to grab a card because she felt like she couldn’t show up empty-handed. Maybe she’d been worried all night and all day, and just maybe that flash of almost inconsequential kindness meant more to her than a thousand words of comfort could offer.

Yeah. That guy is my hero.


Ok, next time a guy will let me go first to the cashier’s, i’ll remember to say “thanks, you are a hero”.

In my experience, every hero I ever met denied it vociferously. My thinking is that “heroism”
is just doing what’s right at the time to help or rescue others. It’s what anyone would do
in the same situation, and I expect that’s why real heroes don’t consider themselves heroes.

Thanks for that asinine response.

Here, I’ll try to make my point a bit more clear – “heroism” is not a definite term. Like I said, one needn’t save someone from a burning building to be a hero. It’s all about paying attention to the needs around you and being a decent fucking person. The story I shared is my own. The man who let me budge ahead of him had no idea the impact that small action would have - maybe he was just being a nice guy, or maybe his kindness was a reaction to something he saw on my face or read in my body language - but it mattered to me. A friendly smile and a small AOK, and I was reminded that despite the somewhat alienating worry I was going through at the time, I’m not alone.

In other words, sonnen, heroism isn’t necessarily about saving lives that are directly in peril, but about giving what you have to give when it’s needed.

Heroism to me is unselfishly giving one’s life to save another. While there are examples of movies say “Sgt. York” or “To Hell and BacK” that glitz the model for heroic models, those were people that could be the definitive paradigms of such.

Heroism is also found in people who go into hostile countries to help those in distress. Needing food, medical or some type of hope that show they are not forgotten in their suffering. There are those that assist stranded or hurt animals in need too. I don’t think playing violent war type video games instills the values of heroic ideals. Or even the training effected to make young men and women less vulnerable to death in dangerous situations in military venues. It stems from compassion that was somehow seeded into the framework of a person’s psyche though whatever conveyance that makes someone selfless in their actions. It even happens with the enemy of an oppositional force that is fought against.

-I never said i was and to sound more as what i am is not my purpose.

The example of the grocery store is more related to me to a form of politeness. Polite persons rarely become heroes. How would you distinguish politeness from heroism? The more polite, i am, the more servile i become and the less i’m admired. The greek heroes lived in their own separate world and generally did not give care for human affairs. They did not help but they were still humans on earth ready to worship them, in the total absence of reciprocity.

If heroism is to be able to help someone like whoeverelse in the same situation, why are some people only serviable and other heroic? Why are there still men to be considered more powerful than others in our societies? Why do men have the need to worship other men they call their “heroes”? A hero cannot be for sure his own hero because the term is not reflexive. It is a self-contradiction. You cannot say i am superior to myself.

Wow. My first reaction to this is, “This guy didn’t understand one word I said.”

My secondary reaction is, “Perhaps he did, and I’m not understanding what he just said.”

What happened in the grocery store, to everyone else who saw it, and more than likely to the man who iniatiated it, was nothing more than politeness. He was being considerate, letting a person with one item go ahead of him and get out quickly rather than have to stand and wait 20 minutes for his entire cart to get checked out. Very polite, indeed. Like I said, maybe he was just trying to be a nice guy.

Letting someone budge in front of you in a grocery store checkout line is hardly heroic and I highly doubt he was thinking of it in such a way. I perceived it as heroism. That man had no idea why I was standing in line waiting to buy a card. If it had been another girl standing behind him, just going about her day, and he’d done the same thing, she probably wouldn’t have considered it a heroic action. She would’ve smiled back, maybe said thank you, and promptly forgotten about it as she walked out of the store. The impact of his action is what makes it heroic rather than polite. This happened almost six years ago, and yet I remember it. One should never underestimate the far-reaching impact a very small, seemingly insignificant act of kindness can have.

If the girl from behind had come to take your turn, would you have considered the mental resistance of the guy not to get angry at her, heroic? Or would the guy have simply kissed her to reward her intrepidity considering she was more heroic than the other passive person next in the queue?


i keep on thinking about that day i accidentally got into the 20 items or less line with a cart full of like 100 items haha

Haha, asshole :stuck_out_tongue:

What does this have to do with heroes? How about all the guys that went to iraq following the orders of our president.
Many of them behaved like heroes following the idea that they were saving our country from terrorism.

heroes? in iraq? someone’s pullin ur leg dawg.