I pulled into a gas station today and saw a black man, approximately 55 years of age, carrying but a black garbage bag, and presumably searching various garbage cans for deposit bottles.
To be honest, I was actually hoping he’d ask me for spare change, because I had over a dollar’s worth in my pocket, and I would have given him all of it. He didn’t.
Instead, a young lady actually called out to him from her just-arrived car: ‘Excuse me! I’ve got some empties here if you want them.’
He put them in his bag and walked out of the service area and stood near the street corner as I proceeded to pull away.
After exiting the station, I had to wait at a red light - at the intersection he was standing at. The car in front of me, without him saying a word as far as I know, threw him a cigarette.
I found the experience memorable.
What are some of your general thoughts on alms or panhandling?
The other week, I drove the length of Blue Hill Avenue, through the Mattapan/Dorchester/Roxbury sections of Boston. The Mattapan section is mostly black, and the avenue gets more Hispanic as you drive north. There was a panhandler at one traffic light. He said nothing to me and I said nothing to him. I handed him a bill, I think it was a five. I liked him.
In Fort Myers Beach, Florida, there is ofen a very shaggy man who holds up a sign at a light. It reads, “Why should I lie? I need a drink.” I usually give him a five when I see him.
Don’t really know why. It’s just a neighborly thing to do, I guess.
I live in Sarasota, Florida, we have what is considered to be the worst treatment of homeless people then anywhere else in the United States.
I’ve never actually seen anyone mistreat homeless people, but nobody gives them any money eitheir or acknowledges them in anyway.
I did read a story once about some kids who just beat a homeless guy to death for no reason, they just went at the guy with bats and beat him until he was dead. I’ll never understand these people.
When I used to smoke I would always throw homeless guys cigarettes, usually they don’t really ask for anything or hold up signs they just sit there. So I just toss them a cigarette when I see them.
I gave a guy an entire pack one time when I was getting off of the interstate while stopped at the light.
Homeless people are nice, they are very appreciative, although I don’t think I’d have the guts to let a homeless guy in my car.
You don’t really want a homeless guy in your car. They usually smell pretty bad.
There is a guy in Naples who buys a pizza and sells it by the slice at an exit ramp. I’m not particularly squeamish, I think, but that’s stretching it a bit. Of course I have been in some restaurant kitchens that could easily be worse. I just don’t eat at those restaurants.
I respond to the homeless with disgust and anger.
But then I regret my response.
Recently, a homeless guy approached me as I was ordering some cheese quesadillas. He asked for money and I snapped at him to get the fuck away from me. My tone and vicious look surprised and scared him. I saw fear in his eyes. Then I felt like a horrible fucking prick.
I told him that I would buy him lunch if he were hungry. He asked for a BBQ Shrimp so I purchased him a plate (it comes with rice, beans, salad, and tortillas). I asked if he wanted something to drink and he asked for a coke. So I bought him that too. I felt good.
About 2 minutes after I left, I felt bad for having been suckered into this by my feelings. Then I shook that off as being silly. Then I got angry at the lousy bum. Then I got angry at myself for being angry for doing something nice. Etc.
As you can see, I hate the homeless because they confuse me.
I know just what you mean; every word of your post I can relate to - even the back and forth aspect.
I think, for me, it boils down to the same sort of factors that determine if I like any stranger - panhandler or otherwise: respect, courtesy, intelligence and eloquence (relatively speaking). If I sense these things (contrasted with pushiness or arrogance) I am generally moved to give.
My girlfriend has ridiculed me for this in the past. I explained to her, ‘Look, it’s not about them, it’s about me’. It feels great to think I’ve made someone’s day, even if, in truth, what I did meant nothing to them.
It’s easy out here, most of the beggars on the street are put there by the mafia. Typically mutilated deliberately at birth, such as breaking a kids legs, to gain sympathy and make cash. They drop them off via minibus in the mornings and pick them up at night, take them to a slum and feed them. Repeat the next day… Don’t give them money and the mafia will stop putting orphans out on the streets.
Agree it’s a completely different ball game elsewhere.
seems i’m one of the few who refuse to give handouts to the homeless.
i don’t like being harrassed (no, not all of them harass … also don’t like solicitors one bit) but more importantly i do not want to reward negative behaviors. i believe that if one is going to remove themselves from being a useful part of our society then they shouldn’t be asking for the compensation related to our society (aka, money, cig’s as well).
granted, some homeless folks did not choose their lifestyle. but there is [plenty] of help to get those that actually want it back on their feet, into homes, into work programs, and back into normal lives again. being homeless for any real length of time is due to that person’s own decision or a mental disorder. if the latter, they need psychological support. if the former, i don’t think it is right for them to ask for something for free that the rest of us work 5 days a week for.
less than six months ago i remember reading an article about those homeless people on the streets with signs that said, “will work for food.” well, a couple of grad. students from some college did a study that consisted of going around and actually offering these people around $10-$20 per hour for 2 hours worth of landscaping work. 90% of them refused!! it turned out to be nothing more than a scam in order to get people to think they were actually trying to change their lifestyle. most people just ended up giving them money without asking for work in return. i guess they believed the intention.
I have a rigorous screening process for all homeless people. Halifax is a small city, but it’s big enough, if you know what I mean. So they’re around… but they are not so excessive that it’s a constant thing. As such, there is quite a wide variety of the types that I will typically come across in the different locations.
I’ll list them now.
Cross Country Slummers – Almost always young. Typically pack fairly light, but still have a fair amount of stuff. They’re obviously hard off, but they’re on a mission – trying to prove something or accomplish some task. I recon many have a family somewhere, with a proper place to live and all that… but for whatever reason they’re undertaking this travel.
I’ll give them a bit of money sometimes.
Local Slummers – These kids simply find it fun to rough it in a fairly nice city. They get by easily, and if they don’t they go back to their parents with their tail between their legs.
Usually don’t give em money, but sometimes use to get pot and I’ll smoke with them.
Mystic Crazies – Who knows where they’re from, doesn’t really matter. They’re lucid, they know what’s up and you can see that gleam somewhere in their eyes that they know something you don’t. Typically covered in tattoos and full of useful knowledge. I like chatting with these guys when I’m drunk and I see one (which isn’t often… as they shy away from the drunk college kids) and I’ll usually give em some change.
Disabled (Crazies) – People who’ve been abandoned and suffer from some sort of disability which impedes their chance to get work. There is a deaf guy which stands outside one of the local liquor stores, asking for money. He can’t speak any words but he does have his own language, and you can tell when he’s pissed. Despite the sign which states ‘I’m deaf’ you’d be surprised how many people explain in detail why they don’t have money. I think by now he must know what ‘debit’ means when pronounciated. To be honest he’s the only real one of these I see in Halifax, it’s pretty good that way. And to be honest I hardly ever give him money… cause I always use debit. Either way they do have my sympathy, as they hit near to my heart.
Fake disables – There is one guy I know is faking it. I always see him on this other end of town, the end no homeless people would go to, but still one chalked full of traffic (a little too smart right?). Clean (shaven), tucked in clothes every day with a backpack with probably has his bagged lunch, and a clean hat when it’s sunny out. And then he has some fucking sign that says ‘I’m disabled’. My guess is he’s a heroin addict who left his wife, kids, and day job to shack up with ‘Marla’ his new addict girlfriend who stays at home to fuck guys while he works.
I scream ‘you stole money from the church collection plate’ on the way by.
4 years ago I was just out of prison, homeless and living in a tent in a remote wood.
Now I’ve got a nice flat overlooking Plymouth UK’s historic old waterfront, so if I can do it, anybody can…
I guess I’m missing out on some emotional and intellectual excitement. I’m downright whimsical, compared to you guys. I just gave a hundred bucks to the daughter of a friend of mine so she could do some school shopping, and I didn’t make her earn it, or give me an articulate reason why I should. She didn’t even ask me for it. I guess I have done her a disservice.
I’m taking names down from this thread, in case any of you ever claim that morality isn’t real, or important, or useful. I have spent my adult life thinking about and reading about morality, and I give a drunk a fiver just to be a good neighbor, to help a guy get a beer.
You sound like a “moral” person to me, no worries.
I try not to look down upon the people for their status and if I can I lend a hand. But being a poor kid in college atm I don’t have much to offer. But it is good enough if we at least try.
Satori - there is nothing wrong with husbanding your own resources when you have few - you are under no obligation to give handouts. Right now, I seem to be able to spare a few bucks - I can hardly call it a sacrifice when I give a wanderer a couple of dollars. You will surely be in that position some day.
I guess my point is that everyone is worse off than someone else, more or less. Everyone has “moral” failings. The homeless can be made a symbol of some of those failings. But they are not symbols - they are people. I do not have the intellectual means to lump them all together as symbolic of some one thing, and therefore to treat each one the same. And I cannot formulate some “objective” standard that any must live up to in order to make judgements about them. Surely the failing is my own. They just seem like people, to me.
