Wave, wave
Wave, wave
Wave, wave
Wave, wave
Wave, crash
Wave crash
Wave, crash
Wave crash
Drum diddy drum
Wave crash
Twinkle twinkle
Wave crash
Drum diddy drum
Twinkle
Wave crash
Voice
Wave, wave
Wave, wave
Wave
.
I find this poem unnerving. There is something innocent in it’s impressionistic qualities, giddy, and yet at the same time, repulsive. This is uncanny.
I hate the fact that you threw in the word voice into this poem - I hate it, it so does not belong, yet, it does; it is the crux, the weight, of this on-the-surface, silly, poem. To me this reads like a nightmare I never want to see. Shudder.
The ordinariness of this poem is disturbing as well.
It was inspired by a combination dream/nightmare. You describe your feelings of this piece almost identically to how I would have described it… That voice was so out of place, so creepy, it ruined an otherwise perfect dream. It sickened me. I woke up so angry but at what I was unsure…
-Thirst