In the cartoon world there is a serious lack of… reality. Sure the animations go to their day jobs, in whatever medium is required, but after hours is a different story. Propelled by the collective imagination stemming from their birthright, the cartoons play unrestrained in cerebral underworld.
These are their stories.
Friday, 2:30am. Spiderman’s house.
The poker game was a routine of sorts. Every friday the friendly superhero neighborhood would converge for a game of holdem. On this particular night Wonder Woman, Mr. Fantastic, Batman and of course, Spiderman sat around the circular table. The rules were simple: Wear the costume, no power cheating.
“What do you have Di? high two pair flop?” Batman’s eyes looked out cautiously across the table to Wonder Woman who sat nonchalantly, glancing down at her cards occasionally while sipping on her drink.
The others had already folded.
“Why don’t you use one of your gadgets to find out in some ridiculous way?†she sneered back at him.
Mr. Fantastic glanced across the rather goofy looking velvet topped table Parker had borrowed for the occasion into Spiderman’s eyes. Spidey nodded slightly but shrugged.
“You seemed to like them just fine not so long ago†the caped crusader retorted staring down the Amazonian Princess for quite some time before putting down his Acme rum and coke.
“Oh fuck you Wayne†Wonder Women hissed. “I’m all in†she said before pushing her pile of multicolored chips into the center of the table. She glanced to Spiderman and nodded with a sloppy wink. It was evident that like Batman, she had had a couple drinks.
‘Fuck’ Bruce thought; if he called and lost the hand he’d be out. There’s now way he could loose to that bitch, not now. He needed to get a read on her, he needed to try and piss her off. “Well you’ve already done that†he responded, lifting up his mask with one hand slightly so he could use the other to scratch his cheek. “Oh if only the Whip of Truth could talk…â€
Wonder Woman narrowed her eyes at Batman before turning to Spiderman again. “He likes to fuck with the mask onâ€
“O…k†Mr. Fantastic started, glancing back and forth between the two ex-lovers. “Let’s just try and focus on the game ok? Wayne…are you going to call?â€
“No, she can take it†he responded pushing the cards into the middle and downing the rest of his drink. “Fuck…†he said to no one in particular and started to pour another Acme drink for himself.
“See, that’s what’s happens when someone with an actual superpower comes across some geek in a cape.†Diana explained, raking the chips over to her side of the table. “We take what we wantâ€
The doorbell rang.
“I’ll get it!!†Spiderman quickly exclaimed and rose from the table, exhaling. Wiping the comedic sweat from his brow he made towards the door to retrieve what he hoped was the pizza. No one be grumpy if there’s pizza Parker thought, or at least hoped.
“Hello, I got a pizza here for…†the pizza delivery boy, Megaman, looked down at his mechanized forearm which, at the moment was displaying a list of sorts through a small screen. “…a Peter Parker.†He looked up to spider as he clued into the name, “Ah Spider man! Cool, I think I met you when you were doing that arcade press conference for one of your video games. To be honest though, I can’t really remember…I was pretty wasted most of the time during those days. Way too many megablasts and not enough enemies you know what I mean? Anyways…that’ll be $19.53â€
Spidey nodded and began to count out the money.
“Yeah I’m just doing this job till my next game comes out…you know how it isâ€
Spidey nodded again. “No it’s cool man…here you go†he handed over the money and took the large pizza.
Megaman took the money and after looking it over stuffed it somewhere in his blue suit. “Hey…†he said glancing past Spidey into the house. “Is there a story going on in there? I think I feel a writer…â€
Spidey backed into the house slowly as he responded. “Uh…no, just some poker. The people next door are popular with a writer though, it’s probably them ok bye!†Parker shut the door on the small blue suited man and made with the pizza back towards the table.
Mr. Fantastic was giving Parker that look again.
“Youer… You’re this close, this close Wayne!†Wonder Woman warned, her voice slurring as she held up two fingers pinched together.
“Whatever…†The caped crusader responded, throwing in a few chips. “Hey Parker, is it weird that every time the doorbell rings you have to open it to find another dude that Diana fucked?â€
Spidey let out a slight laugh but responded angrily. “Guys, guys, let’s just have some pizza…†he shook his head slightly, “Every time with you two; you think you’d get tired of coming here.â€
“She never gets tired of cumming…”