Roleplay. You narrate an action of war against another member of the forum, but the action has to be ironic. In order to survive you must narrate ironic means of escaping your doom. For example: I try to stab wonderer with a ketchup bottle.
At once Gaia unsheathed his his ketchup bottle from its top and vigerously thrust it at Wonderer. Unbeknownst to Gaia, Wonderer was unaffected by the blunt and rounded tip of the glass ketchup bottle and was merely covered in ketchup.
“You stabbed me!” shouted Wonderer grasping his ketchup covered light bruse. “I think I’m Dying!”. Just then 3 police officers bearing 9 millimeter pistols burst into the room. “Officers he stabbed me!” Wonderer yelled.
Within seconds each officer had emptied their clips into the now lifeless body of Gaiaguerrilla. Still acting Wonderer fell into the table, knocking a plate of fries onto the floor. A single fry bounced off one of his bloody gunshot wounds and landed on the floor just within the fading vision of Giaguerrilla… “Ketchup” he thought…
P.S how is stabbing someone with a ketchup bottle ironic!!
It’s weak. You’d have red liquid flowing over your wounds.
As the faint pulse of Gaiaguerrilla churns its way out of the hospital machine, a nurse comes to inspect the patient.
“This one’s lucky” the doctor murmurs.
"Apparently . . . the only bullet approaching his major artery hit the corner of his cigarette pack in the breast pocket, and ricocheted off the crack pipe behind it.
“The other bullet, which was headed straight into his left temple, was once again ricocheted by the body piercing at the end of his eyebrow that’s apparently been giving him gradual lead poisoning for the past 5 years.”
O.K that’s acceptable…
I attack Gaiaguerrilla with a 500 foot tall Mecha Gaiaguerrilla complete with napalm flamethrower action
OR (I’m giving you an option because i’m nice)
I kidnap you, give you drugs to make you forget who you are, convince you that you are a chicken farmer, and then come to your farm weilding dual rubber chickens for a vicious and brutal attack.
I’ll go with the big Mecha.
With Wonderer unaware of Gaiaguerrilla’s knowledge of his intention, Gaiaguerrilla found the secret base where the large Mecha was hidden, then used a large multitude of plastic Transformer robot toys to jam the joints of the giant Mecha robot.
As the robot plummets onto the ground, failing to move joints in order to transform into a jet and fly away, Gaiaguerrilla reaches behind the Mecha, for the electronic defibrillator (as you all know, giant Mecha flamethrowing robots always carry a First-aid defibrillator in case of emergencies.) Using his knowledge of Emergency First Aid, Gaiaguerrilla pulls out the defibrillater and modifies it to give off dangerous electric shocks, chasing wonderer with it.
…
Oh come now, Impious. Don’t you get the challenge?