If i charged her half of what i charge to powerwash a house and driveway after powerwashing her house and driveway (a house and driveway that isn’t mine), she’d owe me $200, moron.
But, but… she’s letting you stay there.
No. She’s needing me to stay here. I don’t need or want to be here but for the artificial obstacle in the way preventing me from finding my own housing.
Fifth or sixth time I’ve explained this to you. And you read Leibniz?
She got the message that someone gives an actual f*** about her tonight.
Yes.
I read Leibniz.
Mooch.
But what pisses me off the most is how i had to suffer the embarrassment before cops who had to hear and see a cat lady mother of an adult sex offender who lives in his mother’s spare room who they secretly think is a child molester because some freak from a forum who is wrong about nearly everything important she has an opinion on sends the cops to the house.
When she said “something something be careful!” I wanted to double over in embarrassment.
I have literally become a bad 80s comedy sitcom, and everyone is laughing but me.
Fishing.
Very first thing in the morning. This is almost every day now.
She’s the retard in the group that is too low in intelligence and resources to ever be able to help someone in any significant way. She simply has nothing to offer. But when she does help you, she tries to overinflate the value of the thing she is doing for you and exaggerate the risks she’s taking to do so so that she can maximize the debt she’s trying to put someone in by helping them.
I use her card for two hundred bucks, and she thinks she should get mother of the year award.
Other mothers send their kids to Harvard and buy them cars and houses, and they don’t even do this. This one lets you borrow her credit card for a sec and thinks you know owe her your life.
um. you do.
You would get zero dollars from me and your ass booted out. Ingrateful. I hope you learn something quick.
Another perfectly backward one.
A child does not ask to be born, so it can not be said that his/her birth if a gift or favor. If anything, the parent owes the child for forcing it into an existence that it did not consent to first.
One of the unique things about our species is how the parents manipulate even their own offspring into becoming indebted to them. This could be an anachronism from our past; the treating of children as property, as able laborers that are useful to the family, etc. The child is brought to life because it is needed to share the work and increase the size and strength of the family unit.
“I brought you into this world, and i can take you out” we always hear a mother say. Incidentally this is something we often hear traders tell their slaves.
“You would get zero dollars from me and your ass booted out”
Why do you keep reminding everyone of what you would do like you’re runnin this thing? Nobody fuckin cares what you would do, asswipe.
You’re like that dumb old obstinate lady on the porch with the other old ladies gossiping about the family across the street and how none of their problems would be happening if you and Jesus were in charge.
Exploitation of an older adult is a serious offense under North Carolina law, often involving misuse of financial resources. According to N.C. Gen. Stat. 14-112.2, exploitation is a Class H felony, targeting individuals who knowingly use an elder’s funds or assets with intent to deprive them of use. Conviction can result in a prison sentence ranging from 4 to 25 months, depending on prior criminal history. Restitution may also be required, underscoring the state’s commitment to protecting the financial well-being of its older residents.
Officer, stop that man! He bought a sheet of MDF and some crown moulding with her credit card and now she’ll have to suffer a better credit score when he pays back the whole $185.
…
Hold on stop everything.
Why would one say “an egg omelet” when any and all omelets are made of egg? It would be a gross and unnecessary redundancy wouldn’t it? Unless there are omelets not made of egg that i am unaware of, i would like to strike that statement from the audio record.
Oh, so now you’re de-escalated and you’re feeling generous with some eggs ‘cause you got what you wanted.
And now we have it from her mouth that being bullied into racking up credit on a card her abusive felon son wants access to … has a name in her mind. That’s all I needed to hear.
I am team Mama Bear all the way.
Break some eggs, Pat!
You should pay off her whole card just to cover this and last month’s rent. And start paying that from now on if you don’t like hearing from adult protective services.
And you better thank her for all the shit she has put up with from your ass over the years. Shoot, an apology? I want to hear some fucking gratitude.
less than eight hours
clock is ticking
OMG, when i pulled off the road in a frantic pace to find a garage that would remove the tint, the first and only place i called quoted me at like $250 dollars… so i thought that was a typical price I should expect to pay for such a thing and didn’t call anywhere else after that. Instead, i put tires on the car so I’d have something to drive after i surrendered my truck tags.
Just found a place that’ll remove the tint for eighty bucks. Fuck if i knew that i wouldn’t have just dropped five hundred on tires.
Now you say “your fault buddy, you shoulda called around before you bought the tires”.
Nope. I blame neo-liberal capitalism for making it possible for a guy to charge $250 while the other ones charge $80, thereby confusing and discouraging a man sitting in a parking lot debating over buying tires or having his tinting removed who then decides the former because he is led to believe that tinting removal will cost around $250 when in fact that is an abnormally high price. Because this private business was able to declare such a high price, i inferred, naturally, that having it done would cost that much and ceased all effort and intent to have the tinting quickly removed to free my truck from the State’s chains.
It stopped being a sad fact that you are wrong about almost everything that’s important a long time ago. Now you’re just a clown who has to keep going because it’s too late to stop, hoping that anyone reading is cheering for you… when in fact they’re throwing up a little in their mouths.
We all know this, but you don’t. And that’s not a tragedy because even if you did realize what a clown you are, you couldn’t change that… so it’s no tragedy that you are oblivious to it.
OK, so you removed the tinting and paid your mom back, right? ‘Cause that’s all I really care about right now … you’re truck‘s good to go? And you can pay rent? I’m gonna need some confirmation if you don’t want me to do what’s next.
Save all the excess verbiage and just show me the receipts, mouth.
The best thing this cat lady has going for her right now is that i can’t prove her smoking when she was pregnant is the cause of the bone deformity and leg-length discrepancy that has plagued me, a physical laborer, my entire life… from my first job framing houses in back breaking pain to make nine dollars an hour to rolling around on a solitary confinement cell floor for eight months because the doctors refused to give me orthotic shoes or prescribe any medication for the pain.
The metal leg brace contraption i had to wear as a baby while i slept so my legs would gradually twist inward and correct their form. I remember feeling trapped on my back because the brace wouldn’t let me sleep on my side or stomach. Like one of those slaves with his legs locked through a hole in a log while he sleeps so he doesn’t try to escape in the night.
… if i ever had definitive proof that her smoking caused this, i would have very likely already killed her. Not in a premeditated way but in a fit of rage. A value judgment is made, my instinct tells me: this is not someone i would allow to be anyone’s mother.
I see her now in my head… the 70s, she’s sitting there pregnant smoking a cigarette, looking fabulous, stylish, talking with friends about some dumb shit that stupid people with IQs of 90 talk about. The 4,000 chemicals in tobacco smoke now surge through my fetal bloodstream, poisoning every cell in my developing body. She laughs flippantly at some lame joke the clown across from her tells, trying to gain her admiration, and lights another one.
It is truly incredible that you are still going, still trying. This is approaching Ecmandu level buffoonery.