what's wrong with me?

i can’t believe there are actual forums for philosophy!

more often than not, i’ve been asking myself, “why am i doing this? why am i doing my homework when watching tv is more pleasurable?” the answer is: it is in my best interest to do my homework. so with this in mind, i try to accomplish almost anything keeping this in mind (common sense…)

recently, i’ve noticed that i never get too upset or too happy. every day seems more monotonous and similar. i’m always content, never very happy (well, sometimes), and never sad. i RARELY get angry. my school work has also declined…for one reason. i just have NO interest. have you ever started to read a book and find that you’re reading the same sentence over and over again? it just doesn’t sink in? that’s how school is. i really do try sometimes, but i just can’t help but stare at the wall and daydream.

this has extended outside of school though. it seems whenever i’m doing something that’s not enjoyable, i just forget about it. i went to burger king, ordered, and sat there waiting for my food. i forgot to pay! everything just seems blurry, though i still “feel” normal. it’s more of a mindset than a feeling.

am i depressed?

Could be, sound almost identical to how i was around when i became depressed.

I went through it mid-late highschool, if you are like that for weeks/months and things (feelings) get a little werse or more extreme over a couple of weeks-months and continues then yes it’s probably deppression. if you don’t feel much to any stress or flustration then it probably wont get much werse.

It’s up to you what you want to do about it if, its not necessarily a bad thing.

You are stuck in a rut.
You need a vacation, to meet new people, get some new ideas.

that’s exactly what it is man…i’m stuck with two parents who i can’t get away from and a bunch of superficial high school kids (most of them)…

actually, lately i have experiencing MORE anxiety than usual (i’ve been visiting colleges). don’t know if this is good or bad…for the most part i’ve been just drifting through the last year or two, indifferent to almost anything except intellectual activities - chess, stanley kubrick. maybe i’m just reaching out for more people like me?

You need money. Without money you’re nothing. You won’t be getting away from your parents or anyone. If you plan on going to Uni, then do that and hold your breath; maybe you can move in with some one, maybe ho yourself for the rent; sell drugs…?

Otherwise your fucked. Sorry, but that’s what it comes down to.

Oh, and don’t be eating any more Burger King, that shit is poison. Learn how to cook, which you’re too young to know how to, restaurant job maybe, that’ll tuffen you up, get you some money and most importantly, teach you your way around kitchens.

Good luck punk.

Sounds like a form of depression. Possibly you don’t have a foundation of passionate belief in anything and now your slowly losing hope because of this void. Everybody has to earnestly believe in something absolute.

woah thats exactly how it is for me. im so apathetic now that i dont even do my homework. luckily i havent had much but, yea enough about me.
i think it could be a form of depression. it sounds like it, but i never thought it could be that. is there a history of depression in your family? depresssion can be hereditary. i mean theres a huge history in my family. my dad, grandpa, great grandma and more.

actually, my brother and my great grandmother went through some kind of depression. but i don’t have “feelings” to go and kill myself, or other people (virginia tech…shame). i’m just so apathetic about everything, i’m more often in my own world. when i was burning a few cds 2 seconds ago, i left 1 blank in and forgot to burn it (maybe i thought i had already done it) for 5 minutes… i just want the quick and easy way out of this. are there pills or something? i’m no pill popper, but this has been going on for over a year now.

Possibly you don’t have a foundation of passionate belief in anything and now your slowly losing hope because of this void.

maybe! that’s very true. i don’t believe in anything. i used to think by myself, in bed, about the origins of our world, the galaxy, and everything incomprehensible beyond that. it made my sad, how inferior i was compared to the universe, and i felt my stomach fall to my feet. then, i “realized” that fairy tales such as religion are no places to put my time, effort, and trust. i play a few sports, none that i am very passionate about.

I don’t mean you have to embrace religion, religion is man made; why not consider searching for the Truth?

However this will cause the sick feeling you mentioned and the closer you get the sicker you will feel. That’s the problem with Truth, it’s not pretty nor is it easy to digest, and it will show you very ugly things and break your heart. Once this is over there will be a peace and awareness inside that will found true passion.

IOW, if you really want to know the Truth you must accept it as it is and not try to change it to suite you, nor can you gloss it over to numb the effects, it’s a sledgehammer with purpose and is far stronger then anyone. IMO, fighting this Truth is what causes depression and finally some form of insanity.

Welcome to the human condition.

what is this truth you speak of? scientology?? i haven’t been fighting anything lately :\

Maybe you just need something for your nerves.

No, I don’t believe in any organized religions or cults, I’m talking about the obvious Truths that we try to control.

Like trying to make someone Love you, or denying what and who you are because it doesn’t paint a flattering thought. Or justifying hate of a particular person or group by thinking “I would never do that” with disgust. Thinking your somehow better or above anyone or elite in some way. Everyone needs to completely destroy their ego at one point in their life.

I could go on and on, but I think you get the idea.

i agree with you, but i don’t understand how it applies to my situation.

It may not, hell I don’t know you from Adam, it’s just a guess from the description of the symptoms, sounds like you lack Passion which is driven by Purpose which is founded by knowing yourself truthfully.

Or it could be something completely different.

sometimes i’m passionately aggravated by some people…in a george carlin kind of way. does that count?

No, unless you’re apathetic about violence, then you’re potentially another Cho. Hopefully you have a productive outlet and are as funny as George Carlin.

Maybe you just need to relax and stop fighting the world because it is not whay YOU want it to be.

It is what it is and you are who you are and it is up to you to find your place in the world not the other way around.

So stop being so depressed about things you have no control over and start figuring out what it is that you can control, like your attitude and your outlook on life.

So you are just some infitesimal particle in an infinite universe, so what!!!
Get over it. You have places to go and things to do.

Its your life
Live it or live with it.

very true. and i am very apathetic about violence…and just about everything. (i’m intelligent enough to distinguish the difference between brutality and anger) ah whatever…i guess i’ll snap out of it sooner or later.

That’ll be $859.98.