Leo
i’ll be damned
[size=150]And the madness continues… [/size]
[uses his powers of super-predictory-Tabulovision to puncture the space time barrier]
New mundane topics coming to a thread near you soon…
Do you come here often…? - How often do you post here at ilp…?
Can I buy a lady a drink…? - what’s your favourite tipple…? Is there a one true philosopher’s poison…? (apart from Hemlock)
If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me…? - Ladies - What’s your bra size…? - And does it relate to your philosophical stance as well as your physical stance - ie: would the more heavily endowed philosopheress lean toward a more existentualist position…?
Me too. Scary. Though I’m a libra/scorpio (on the cusp)…
I bet the priapic one is a Virg…o 
Aquarius-Pig
My ex-boyfriend was a Libra/Monkey…current is a Leo/Ox…ex-husband was a Taurus/Dragon…the other 50 I don’t remember…lol… 
These are the questions I want the answer to:
What is your natural hair colour?
What size are your breasts and/or penis?
Do you bite your nails?
Do you smoke?
What is your favorite colour/novel/movie/song?
Do you have kids?
Do you have a pet, if so, what kind?
i’ll be damned
shyster, show me yours and i’ll show your mine baby. “What size are your breasts and/or penis?” i thought that sounded suspicious…
I have 1000 posts, shouldn’t it be obvious by now?
i have 2000 posts, and most people here still live in the dark…
Maybe we’ll come around by the time you hit 4,000. Anyhow, I have a long post history, someone should be able to guess my sign. I suppose, I could always lie and say the person was wrong even if they got it right…oh well, screw it, I’m a Gemini.
gemini is a friendly sign of libra, and it works like this: gemini craves the perfection and balance of libra, libra helps gemini to get better. trust me, when i read dante, who’s a gemini, i sense the imbalance and want to offere meditation
You never know…34C…no penis
And what I’m supposed to tell you? My breasts are too insignificant to measure and I’ve no clue how to measure the stick…
[size=150]How to Measure Your Penis[/size]
Length measuring:
Step #1: Make the penis erect.
Step #2: Slightly pushing down on the scrotum, hold the penis upright.
Step #3: Place measuring device (tape measure/ruler) at base or root of penis.
Step #4: Record measurement at tip of glans.
Width measuring:
Step #1: Make the penis erect.
Step #2: Wrap tape measure around thickest point and record measurement.
Tune in next time for “How to weigh your balls on a kitchen scale”
… can’t do it right now shyster, guess you’ll need to wait for a while. You never told us about the hair and stuff, you want load up a pic over in the pic thread?
Sorry, it was just my lame attempt at humour…with the right delivery, it would be really funny…honestly…hahaha???
The avatar is my pic with a crazy artistic filtre. Where is this pic thread you speak of?
Aquarius…air, just like me. Pig, just like m…never mind. My older girl is an ox (Virgo), my younger girl is a Taurus (snake).
Used to be blonde, but by 10/11 changed to dirty blonde, now brown.
I’m not sure if I read your other instructional post correctly, but are you suggesting men measure from the BOTTOM of the penis? The standard procedure is to measure from the top, where it connects with the place beneath the gut (the pelvic area). By that measurement, I am slightly larger than average based on the most “liberal” standards, and far above average based on a meta-analysis of research on the topic (which I give far more credence to, since the “standard” average length was never officially determined, and the most liberal average length was also never officially determined (it contained the mean plus a one inch standard deviation, all too “neat,” meaning that it was just a rough average based on “common beliefs” as opposed to actual scientific measurement/assessment/analysis). I’ve never measured the girth, but I’d presume it’s “average” or on the lower side of average…it is the classically sculpted penis, circumcised, good length, but not too thick/wide (which, in fact, is the most important component of “size”…but fortunately I know what to do with it better than most… 
), and it has been complimented by many as looking “perfect” and “beautiful” (along with its classic shape, there are no weird colours, markings, bends, angles, etc…for more on penises, check out that link I posted before).
More like an initial bite to make an “incision,” then I peel them. For toe nails, no biting, just pick/peel.
Used to, from about 15 (weed came first). Stopped numerous times, sometimes for years. Currently, I might smoke one or two butts every few weeks, usually as an accompaniment to other poisons (hence the number can diminish significantly when I’m too busy to engage in silliness).
Traditionally, “red” (from childhood), then black/Guns of Navarone (not sure why, I jsut remember reading it as a kid and really enjoying it…haven’t had a chance to read novels for so long… 
)/Star Wars (again, historically speaking…watched it in theatres dozens of times, and used to watch it each weekend when visiting my father’s home)…after that, too many movies to list, though Natural Born Killers struck a nerve (I was on the edge of my seat, literally, gritting my teeth and just got engrossed in it…ah, the joys of watching movies in an “enhanced” state…), Requiem for a Dream was pretty interesting, Santa Sangria is one of the most fucked up movies of all time, I used to do the Rocky Horror Picture Show each weekend, then used to “host” it for a while; Murder in Robin Hood Hills (or something like that) left me shaking my head, as did the documentary on the man who, along with his son, was accused of molesting dozens of his students (Watching the Friedmans?)…there are so many more…/Comfortably Numb, the soundtrack from Etat de Siege (parents used to listen to it all the time…when I taped it as an adult, I fell in love with it again…the most uplifting music ever, even though the movie’s topic is a downer…), Led Zeppelin has to be up there…umm…When the Levee Breaks, Floyd’s “One of these Days” from Meddle, Mahavishnu Orchestra’s “Birds of Fire” and “Dance of the Maya” and others…Beastie Boy’s Sabotage…
See above…but older one (almost 8 ) looks like her mother (exotic looking) and the younger one (4 soon) looks like I used to when I was a baby (and she has my many quirks and funny/goofy expressions), but both are embarrassingly gorgeous (embarrassing b/c people with their own kids stop us on the street to tell us how gorgeous they are). The two girls are such opposites, and actually live up to their astrological signs (older one is serene, serious, compliant (mostly), loving, generous, helpful, etc., while younger one is wild, crazy, funny, spirited, mischievous, goofy, etc…).
Miniature poodle (boy), on the small side, red (looks like a teddy bear, or so everyone says)…won the “Doggie Olympics” for the two puppy courses he attended…so many people stop me on the street and ask where I got him…I really should ask his breeder for a commission. I’m too darn proud of my puppy (9 months). Grew up with animals all my life, several husky/wolf mixes (sometimes with malamutes), cats, iguana (gave her up when we had our first daughter), many budgies (very short life span or flew away…called each one Charlie…), rabbits, gerbils (girls have two now), turtles, fish, and a MONKEY (when they used to be legal). My wife isn’t into animals, so I lived without a pet since I met her years ago, then got the iguana on a whim (didn’t please her, but it didn’t SHED…that’s how the poodle made it in, though now she loves him too…he is so spoiled…sleeps with us…no comments please… 
).
There, Shy. That is me, sort of…
psyque, psyque, psyque…
I took a breather from ILP for awhile and boom, I turn on my computer and you are givng clinical advice on measuring penises. Now why am I not surprised? Shy wasn’t serious was she? Oh my, I think these people may have something better to to than take out a yardstick (I refer to Detrop, of course) and measure their member.
I am a Taurus, loved the book “Anna Karenina,” song: Sexual Healing (or anything by) by Marvin Gaye… although my latest is Paradise (or anything) by Sade, I have five children, my hair was dark brown, now silver, but dyed blondish. Very short. My hair, not my penis. I am too limp today to measure mine. Sorry. Movies? I have too many to count, but “Dr Zhivago” comes to mind, “Intersection,” obscure, but terrific, and currently am watching French movies with my husband - not a bad way to get the zing back. Sex x 1000 and funny as hell. Laughter and sex hmmmmmmm. or was that sex and laughter?
I forget.
Actually, Shyster, I think you did avartised a pic of yours, or two. Some moderater just took my advise and made the pic thread sticky, surely you can’t possibly miss it.