not wanting to be human

I propose that the condition of not wanting to be human,
is a healthy expression of that oh-so-limited freedom that people claim to have.

We must imagine something greater than what is,
to strive for a form of progress.
Or at least, this could be an inner protest towards decadence.

Fate hangs heavily on me,
so i can’t just choose to change everything about me.
I’d like to, but the desire to choose, is not fully there.
I feel all around me, drives and human emotions and intentions.
All happening automatically.
Most of “me” is automatic.
Humans are biological robots.

“Fate hangs heavily on me,” How so?

As we approach the miniture, pointillistic set of AI , the inner world of the cat in the box, whom we can only fathom is she/he is alive, a developing problem appears to arise between man and those ascribed to as the lesser of man.

Maybe the humanness relates to memory, yo retain the subtle distinctions which are a necessary part of becoming human, that part which is if no longer an existent -becomes erased from his near temporal recollection, while the long term memory remains as very general precepts.

So what human aspirations can really be reconstructed from less then abstract modes of expression, ?

Finally, all or most of that structural expression is reduced to the minimum, while retainining color inspired allusions to whips of recollection.

There are two dans.
One : Dan the hermit. He wants to devout all resources and time,
into the inner persuit of clarity, nobility, stability, peace, and goodness.

Two : Dan the demon. He wants to go more and more insane,
and to punish everyone and everything for their natural condition.

I want 1 to overcome 2.

I find this all very hard to put into words.

Makes perfect sense actually - I think most if not all people have an inner “demon”. The aspect of themselves that they want to overcome.
Anyone who does not think so is potentially deluded.

Could that account for two differing views of Christianity the traditional one enimating along the lines of the New Testament and the other one the Gnostic testament which appeared to fracture Catholicism .

If such schism, is both or either gained legitemacy, it would seem to imply a demotation and a denotation of defining demonic from the sought after clarity.

Finally, such shift to absolute definition not resemble a dramatic deconstruction to increasing general descriptions of becoming or, being human.

A distinction has been made here , as well between becoming and being human in a recent post.

If you chose not to be human, what else could you be?

Un animale