Anyway, getting back to where I would like to see this thread go: connecting the dots existentially between sense deprivation [congenital or otherwise], dasein and the manner in which human interaction often revolves around what we struggle to understand about and communicate to each other.
Also, the exploration of dreams themselves.
As for the first consideration, here I always come back to the time I first saw Children of a Lesser God. In a very profound and powerful way it drew me into the lives of two people who, while sharing the same world here and now, had lived lives that were very, very different. That which I construe to be the embodiment in dasein. One was born deaf while the other was not deaf but spent his life teaching the deaf to better interact with the hearing world.
But: because of the gaps in their lives, their communication would often breakdown. And that’s what always draws me in here. The need to create compromises when important parts of your understanding of the world are different.
Consider:
[b]James: I really just came to ask one question. What happened when Sarah tried to speak?
Mrs: Norman: What happened? She looked awful. She sounded awful. People made fun of her. What do you think?
Sarah [to James]: Hearing boys? They could never be bothered to learn my language. I was always expected to learn to speak. Well, I don’t speak. Sex was always something I could do as well as hearing girls. Better! At first, I let them have me because they wanted to. Before long, the boys were lined up on a waiting list my sister kept for me. No introduction, no talk. Just went to a dark place and fucked. They didn’t even take me out for a Coke first.
Sarah [to James]: I don’t do anything I can’t do well.
James: Sarah…what do you want?
Sarah: You.
James: You got me. What else?
Sarah: Children. I want deaf children.
James: What do you want me to say, that I want deaf children? No, I don’t. But if they were, that would be fine.
James: You know I haven’t turned on my hi-fi since you…Hold it. That sounds like…like I’m blaming you for me not listening to music…Thank you. I will. I’ll rest my hands nd listen to something beautiful.
[Bach Plays]
James: I can’t enjoy it. I can’t, because you can’t.
James: What do you hear? I mean, is it just silence
Sarah: No one has ever gotten in there to find out.
James: Will you ever let me in?
Sarah: You don’t want to help anybody. You just want to change and control them. I think that you want me to speak. And I just want to be me.
James: Well, who the hell are you?!
Sarah: …you think for me, think for Sarah. As though there were no “I.” I will be with you, quit my job, learn how to play poker, leave Orin’s party, learn how to speak." That’s all you, not me. Until you let me be an “I” the way you are, you can never come inside my silence and know me. And I can’t let myself know you.
James: Well…that’s all very moving. But how are you going to manage? You can lock yourself back in your precious silent castle…I heard. I heard every word, goddamn it. I translated for myself. It went from your hands into my brain and out my mouth. And you know what? I think you’re lying. I don’t think that you think being deaf is so goddamn wonderful. I think that you’re scared to death to try. I think it’s nothing but stupid pride that’s keeping you from speaking right. You want to be on your own. You don’t want to be pitied. Then you learn to read my lips and use your mouth for something besides showing me you’re better than hearing girls in bed. Read my lips. What am I saying? You want to talk to me, then you learn my language. Did you understand that? Of course you did. You’ve probably been reading lips for years. But that’s the great control game, isn’t it? I’m the controller? What a fucking joke. Now, come on! Speak to me! Speak! Speak to me!
Sarah [all but screaming]: Aah! See my mouth! Aah! Hear my voice! I’m not afraid!
Mother: I sent you away because I didn’t know how to take care of you. Your father couldn’t accept you. He felt he’d failed…You’re right. I hated you for driving him away. Please forgive me.
Sarah: I have been angry since I was a little girl. I didn’t want to hurt again, so I used my anger to push you away. I’m sorry.
James: I’m sorry…for hurting you.
Sarah: But I learned from you. I learned that I can hurt…and I won’t shrivel up and blow away.
James: I don’t want to be without you, either. Do you think that we could find a place where we can meet not in silence and not in sound?[/b]
That’s what happens when you become involved with anyone in which there are big differences in how you see yourself out in the world. Sometimes this revolves around biological [genetic] differences and other times around social and political [memetic] differences.
Then it comes down once again to…
1] might makes right — the one with the most power gets to call the shots.
2] right makes might — you can both agree on an ideal solution
3] moderation, negotiation and compromise — you meet somewhere in a murky and ever shifting middle
And all of the many different, complex, ever shifting combinations of both.