Only Existence is exclusively a member of itself as an existent because it is not a member of anything other than itself (as an existent). All other existents are members of other than themselves (they are members of Existence, whilst they are not Existence Itself).
That would mean that I am Existence too. Whereas to my understanding, I belong to Existence. I am not Existence. If I cease to exist, Existence does not cease to exist.
I think it’s contradictory to say all existing sets are Existence. Only one existing set is Existence in my opinion. That is the set of all existents (which I have called ‘Existence’).
So you have said that a list of all lists is absurd. That would mean that if I have four lists in my room, and I wanted to make a fifth list titled “a list of all lists in my room”, this list cannot contain itself. Whilst I agree that this list cannot physically contain itself in addition to itself because it is physically itself once as opposed to twice, I do think that this list can list itself. I also think that this list is such that it lists items that are not members of themselves (because they are members of it), and it lists one item that is a member of itself (the list lists itself).
Where is the contradiction in the above? Rejecting the above is contradictory (and you have rejected a list that lists all lists).