Yes, I’ll certainly keep you informed about any upcoming quandries, and I’ll look forward to hearing how you resolve yours, too. Each situation is unique, and perhaps no hard and fast guidelines are possible. Intuition, logic and all sorts of other things must always come into play, including, as always, chance. My overriding principle is how to live as naturally, and independently, as possible.
Yep, I know all too well about the fulminating fanatics here. I suppose they can’t do any harm. Not here, anyway. Scaring people off from taking the vaccine, especially if they are in a vulnerable group, is the only sure fire way of keeping the pandemic going and killing thousands more people.
Perhaps British English has a tendency to short, punchy words. It’s an interesting subject though, how languages develop and diverge, and how they are used. In Wales, specifically North Wales, they still speak Welsh as their main, everyday language, although they can, of course, all understand and speak English too. Nevertheless, in buses, shops, and everywhere else, it’s Welsh that they use. That’s one of the reasons why it’s such a fascinating place to visit. Welsh is actually a very beautiful language, with a nice lilt to it and a lot of soft consonants. Here are some examples of it, if you haven’t heard it before.
Anything creative is always wonderful, and good for the spirit, too. What sort of works of art does your daughter specialise in?
Yes, the guy I loved was sighted. So, indeed, have been the others I’ve had tentative sorts of dates with since. I basically don’t hang around with blind people any more, since leaving school. It didn’t really seem to be an issue with him, and we most definitely had all the right chemistry. But I was never really sure if it was going to become an issue, or if deep down he felt it was something that was going to be a barrier between us. Perhaps I was just young and naive, but it ended pretty much before it even began. I’ve never felt the same way with anyone since, which I suppose is what I meant when I said that they never measured up. It certainly wasn’t their fault.
But in terms of actual communication, I don’t think that was ever a problem, or rather, I didn’t think so, anyway. In fact, I was looking forward to exploring each other’s worlds together. It would have been fun, I think, while getting to know each other.
Visceral is indeed a good word to describe the emotions of dreams, and there is certainly no logic involved. It’s fascinating how the mind seems to cobble together an almost coherent story out of them. Not sure what I think about professional dream interpreters though. As you say, what the dream is saying should be pretty obvious.
Thanks, Ralph McTell is definitely brilliant.
Here’s something a bit different. Fungus on Mars! Can you have a look at the pic and tell me what it looks like, please?
That’s really all there is in the end. Something important happens to us and we either have others we can talk to about it or we don’t. Those who are as genuinely interested in understanding how we have come think and to feel about it as we are interested in understanding how they have come to think and to feel about the important experiences in their own life. The rest is then groping as best we can to come up with an exchange that best communicates something that we react to in, at times, different worlds.
Okay, let’s agree: you are aware of them over there and I am aware of them over here. And that we can only react to them as best we can. And hope that it doesn’t reach the point where they can do great harm.
Yes, and even among those who speak English, the word pronunciations can be so far removed from the manner in which I understand them, I am simply unable to follow the conversations. Well, not in “real life” so much as in films. There have been movies I’ve watched [especially those set in Scotland] in which even though the language spoken is English, I can only follow the plot by using subtitles. In fact, there are a handful of small films set there that did not provide subtitles. I was barely able to finish the films because I couldn’t connect the words being spoken with the things that they did.
Here’s a humorous video that explores Irish and Scottish accents: youtu.be/k3AgxhGU4JU
Exactly like your own video. Well, to my ears. Is that actually English that they are speaking? I could follow, well, nothing that was said.
Drawing, painting, creations with cloth. Her work is more in sync with what is called “modern art”. The world of art that I am least familiar with. And attracted to. Works that resonate with me, well, not much at all. It’s more an aesthetic, subjective, subjunctive experience. Whereas, as with philosophy, I am more inclined towards art/words that seek to explore human interactions more existentially…in terms of the behaviors that we can communicate most effectively in making others understand what we mean.
Yes, this is the part in almost all relationships where we never seem able to be entirely certain if our partner “gets” us and our world. And it could be in regard to any number of things. Physical, intellectual, emotional, spiritual. I was once involved in a relationship where I felt truly anchored to an extraordinary emotional bond. The chemistry was smoking. But the things that were most important to me outside the relationship – music, philosophy, political commitment – were of almost no interest to her. I was drawn and quartered. When I ended the relationship, she sent me a letter in which she pointed out that I might find this “perfect women” but there would always be something that kept it from being as powerful as the relationship that we shared. And to this day that has turned out to be exactly true.
And it’s often futile to try to assess or to assign blame or fault. There are simply too many factors that get all tangled up in lives that ever and always change over time.
Still, I find it hard to understand why you would not choose to be around others who were blind. But, here, again, I can only imagine myself becoming blind. And needing that empathy.
So: Is that something you would feel comfortable telling me about? Clearly, for each of us there are “personal things” that we prefer to keep to ourselves. I’m just one those people who, in being fascinated with why different people do different things in similar situations, tend to be less uncomfortable with revealing things about myself. Everyone is unique here.
And, true, this is a “public forum” so privacy is all the more problematic here.
Yes, visceral is one of my favorite words. That and intuitive. They both seem to convey this sense of reality that combines elements of the id, the ego and the superego. But “in dreams” it appears to be the brain itself that conducts the orchestra. And, speaking for myself, I’m here to give mine a standing ovation.
In the photograph at the top of the page, there appear to be these things that to me resemble tennis balls. Of different sizes. So, if I were to become blind and held one of these things in my hand, I would say, “this feels like a tennis ball…mostly round and fuzzy on the surface”.
The next time you hold a tennis ball in your hand, that’s what you can’t see here.
On the other hand, one of them is more like two tennis balls fused together in the middle…which is narrower. For the sighted, it looks like cells dividing in the womb.
Then the part where they might actually be examples of “life on Mars”. And then “my thing” here: exploring and explaining how each of us as individuals would react to that in so many different ways.
The video I posted was actually in Welsh, so it’s not surprising you couldn’t understand a word! As a Celtic language, Welsh isn’t even all that closely related to English, though it’s full of English loan words, and, though you wouldn’t think so to listen to it, lots of Latin ones as well, dating from the time when Britain was part of the Roman Empire. That’s another reason why I find dialects and things like that fascinating, because they are living embodiments of history.
Sounds lovely, all that arty stuff. Maybe I should give it a try…
It seems that the person you’re describing there is “the one that got away” (regardless of who dumped whom), the one your mind keeps going back to over and over again, and wondering, what if? I suppose I’ll never know if that guy was put off by me being blind, because there’s no way he would ever have admitted it.
As for why I don’t tend to hang around with other blind people, a number of factors are at work here. For a start, none of my friends from school actually live anywhere near where I do. We keep in touch, of course, but rarely meet up. True, there’s a branch of the RNIB in my city, and I very occasionally attend events, such as their national conference a few years ago. But to be honest, I actually find all that a bit boring, and the politics annoying. I also find sighted people, in general, far more interesting (not to mention far more numerous), and would choose their company any day. That may well put me in something of a minority among blind people, but probably not as much as you might think. When I want to hang out among like-minded people, talk things over, and so on, it’s to my Pagan friends that I go.
I’m always happy to discuss anything you like. I doubt anyone else is still reading our random ruminations on life, the universe and everything any more, anyway, but even if they are, that’s fine. If you’ve taken the trouble to write to me, and to share your thoughts and feelings, then I’ll always do the same in return.
And talking of random ruminations, what do you like to eat? As you know, I’m currently in a vegetarian phase, and have just made myself a very mild curry with chopped apple, new potatoes, cherry tomatoes and butter beans with melted Stilton and grated Cheddar, which I’m eating right now, between typing.
Thank you, that was a good description, and I’m sure that won’t be the last time I ask for something like that. As for actual life on Mars, I notice that the article has been roundly debunked by a whole load of sceptics. This will keep on happening right up to the moment that they actually find it. If it really is confirmed one day, I think I would be very happy. The life-force finds a way, anywhere and everywhere.
Thanks for the links. The first one reminded me of Sonic Youth’s version of Superstar.
Here’s another one I like, Eternal Flame by the Bangles. The phrase “eternal flame” actually has an important spiritual meaning for me, which has nothing at all to do with this song (though might be why I like it).
And, in a change of mood, but still on the theme of Mars, Forever Autumn, sung by Justin Hayward, of Moody Blues fame, in Jeff Wayne’s War of the Worlds.
But the one that really made me cry was the next track on the same album, Thunder Child, sung by Chris Thompson. A single ship, all on its own, valiantly battling it out against overwhelming and incomprehensible odds, and then getting sunk, is very poignant.
That’s good to know! I actually thought it was English. I was bewildered because I could not make out anything at all that they were saying. And these seemed to be sophisticated, educated, articulate men and women. I thought the problem must be me.
Yes, language is something that many simply take for granted. Few stop to think about the extraordinary journey that particular words/sounds have taken down through the ages. And then the part that most intrigues me: how different people can hear the same language and react to it in different [sometimes conflicted] ways. It’s like people hearing the same song…some loving it, others hating it.
How does that come to be?
There’s a movie that I really like called Blind Beast. Unfortunately the trailer is no longer available. It is the story of a blind man who creates a world all his own by reconfiguring art from the visual into the tactile. He kidnaps a woman and is obsessed with creating a sculptured likeness of her. Then their relationship takes on a rather, well, ghastly trajectory. But for him touch is everything.
What keeps playing out in my mind over and over again is this: would I have chosen different…if I could? The thing is that she turned out to be right. But that was never a certainty. I came close with Supannika [the green card woman I noted above] and there was always the possibility that I might have found someone that I could be absolutely crazy about…and who did share my passions.
It just never happened.
Of course there is no way I can actually understand this. And the reason is simple: I’m not you. I have almost no understanding of the life that you have lived, the experiences that you have had, the people you have met. And I can only attempt to scratch the surface in understanding it up to a point in exchanges like this one. On the other hand, like you, being around “like-minded” people is also very important to me. If only, here and now in my life, virtually.
There’s just something about the reality of blindness – of imaging myself blind – that would propel me towards finding a close friend who shared this world with me. But, then, as you note, being blind from birth is a whole other kind of blindness. Something that is forever beyond my understanding.
Yes, this has been a really rewarding exchange. And it’s nice to know for both of us. Let’s keep it going and see what pops up.
As with much of my life these days, the food I eat has become just another part of the routine. I pretty much eat the same things day after day. Fruits and vegetables, nuts, chicken, fish, bagels. It’s always healthy food however and despite it being routine, it never stops being delicious. Although, admittedly, I do miss the trips to the restaurants I would go to with my daughter.
On the other hand, you seem to be entirely more inclined to explore the world of food more…adventuresomely?
Please do.
What can possibly be more mysterious than the evolution of matter into biological life on Earth? Any attempt to explain it takes you to things like the gods, or to a God/the God…or to nature itself.
Yes, this is one of my favorite cover songs of all time. The voice, the music seem to zero right in on how mysterious and fragile and enigmatic relationships can be. Every time I listen to it, I go tumbling back to the most haunting relationships in my life.
Thanks for all the songs that you send my way. Keep them coming please.
It is indeed strange how people can hear exactly the same words, or songs, and have completely different reactions to them. And a good thing too, of course, if not taken to extreme.
I’m sure there’s always still time for any of us to find our true love, if it’s meant to be. Hope is eternal, as they say.
Yes, that’s absolutely right. If you lost your sight, you’d be in a very different position to me, and I can fully understand why you would feel that way. That’s one particular trauma that I’ll never, ever have to experience. For me, my life is just completely normal.
A rewarding exchange indeed, and I look forward to the next installment.
Adventuresome, definitely! I like preparing food for people, and before the lockdown I had got into a routine of inviting a few friends over on Fridays and cooking for them. While I can’t say it was always a success, I can definitely say it was always from the heart. My little “dinner parties” have been more sporadic of late, but I’m sure we’ll be settling down into the old routine again soon.
Yes, I’ll certainly keep the songs coming, whenever I think of some. And thanks for your selection (the first one wouldn’t play again, though, sadly).
I’m off to York in June, by the way, not sure exactly when, though. This has become something of an annual tradition for me, going up and staying with a friend for a few days, and sometimes attending a local Pagan event, if one’s on. I even went last year, between lockdowns. York is a really nice city, packed full of medieval buildings and narrow, cobbled streets. It also, allegedly, has lots of ghosts, and even has ghost tours. The Roman and medieval walls of the city are still largely extant, and it’s possible to walk round them, and one of the pubs in the city centre still has part of the Roman fortress in its foundations. We will also probably go to the coast, most likely to a town called Flamborough, which has even more ancient remains, including a huge Neolithic earthwork called Dane’s Dyke. Again, supposedly haunted. A couple of years ago, at my insistence, my friend and I went round all the pubs in the town, talking to the locals about the folklore of the area, collecting stories. It was really fascinating, and a whole lot of fun, too.
Yes, I like that point. It would be a grim world to live in if we all reacted the same [like robots] to all the words and songs that we hear. Of course here, in turn, where each of us as individuals draws the line in regard to what is or is not extreme is also going to be ultimately uncertain and enigmatic.
I remember once exploring this in regard to a particular song. This one: youtu.be/xJeWySiuq1I
It was with a woman that I was exchanging “mixed tapes” with. I had mentioned that it was one of my favorite songs, and she admitted that she, well, hated it. So we went back and forth trying to explain why we felt what we did. But it was futile of course. From my point of view, it all basically fits into my understanding of the “self” as a complex and, in the final analysis, inexplicable aggregation of all the different factors in our lives that come to create all of our diverse reactions to things like “musical taste”. What tends to bug me here the most are those who insist that some genres are “better” than others. Always the ones they prefer. Me, I’m all over the map musically…as can be noted on my music thread here.
Well, let’s hope that is true.
Yes, and how strange that might seem to those who, in always having been sighted, will consider that to be the only possible normal. I think my reaction here goes back to my own existential obsession with empathy. The yearning on my part to find those who are most like me in regard to the “big things” in my life. If I were to become blind, I would want to share my passions in turn with someone who was also able to once see. Beyond that though I’m not able to go.
Just as you asked me to reconfigure what I saw in the Mars photo into words, do you ever ask your friends to describe as best they can the food that you prepare for them? Again, for some, it would just seem strange to consume something and never see what you are eating. Unless, of course, as with you, that could never be strange because you never could see it. Back to that at times ineffable gap between these three worlds. The always blind, the once sighted, the always sighted.
Thanks.
Too bad about the Silly Sisters, “The Old Miner” song. As with “The Coming of the Roads” it is song in which the words and the nusic so enhance and reinforce each that the effect is especially moving.
The words are the same but the music is nothing at all like June Tabor’s and Maddie Prior’s. And, in fact, the music here just does not match the gripping sentiment encompassed by the Silly Sisters. Personally, I feel almost nothing at all.
Well, when you return, fill me in on all the highlights. Which would encompass what you heard, smelled, touched, tasted and…intuited?
The closest I have ever come to experiencing places like that is, of all places, on the Science and Smithsonian channels. They occasionally have programs relating to the exploration of times long gone. Programs like “Mysteries of the Abandoned” and “Unearthed” and “Forbidden History”.
I’m sorry but that song means nothing to me. Hehe.
I certainly wouldn’t want to claim that my own favourite genres are somehow inherently superior to any others. My liking for folk, for example, is tied in with my interest in history and folkore, and Paganism, too. Talking of which, did you know that the Pagan movement actually has it’s own set of songs, or chants, that everyone knows, and are heard at all sorts of different events? Here’s one of the most famous ones, We all Come from the Goddess, also known as Hoof and Horn, written by Z. Budapest, the creator of Dianic (that is, female only) Wicca.
None of the modern Pagan songs are particularly old, and are certainly not in any way traditional. In complete contrast, though, is the Abbots Bromley Horn Dance, which really is a genuinely ancient Pagan ritual, complete with its own music, that has been performed by the same family for many hundreds of years, every September (though its date has varied in the past) in the village of Abbots Bromley, Staffordshire. I’ve found a clip of it here and as you’ll hear, they combine their own unique music, handed down from generation to generation, with other, more well known tunes.
I try to make it to the horn dance every year, assuming I can persuade someone to drive, as it’s one of my favourite events. Sadly, though, it was cancelled last year due to the pandemic, possibly for the first time since Cromwell in the 17th century. The dancers dance round the village and its local area all day, carrying huge, heavy reindeer horns on their shoulders, which have been carbon dated to around one thousand years old. I had the very great honour of being allowed to touch one of them once. That particular clip is from 2013, which I was at, so you’ll have to let me know if I appear in it.
Although I can understand why you might feel the need to share your experiences with someone in the same position as you, I don’t think that’s actually necessary, for empathy. If it were, how similar would the other person have to be?
I do occasionally ask my friends if I’ve laid the table out ok, or the tablecloth outside, if it’s a picnic in the garden. The visual appearance of the food itself is not something I’ve ever really thought about, though, to be honest. I’ve never had any complaints on that score, anyway, though I suppose, on reflection, I probably wouldn’t do, even if it was a complete dog’s breakfast.
I shall of course let you know about my trip to York, and will look forward to describing it for you. Now surely that’s better than watching stuff like that on the telly!
Seriously though, back to that sci-fi invention above in which you and another hook themselves up to a machine that allows you to experience the world as each other. You hear a song that you love as another who hates it hears it. You get to experience hating the song too. Just as, hooked up to it, you and I might experience each other’s world as blind and sighted.
In fact, in thinking about that [something that fascinates me for reasons I’m not entirely clear about] I went to Google and came up with this: nautil.us/blog/what-do-blind-pe … tually-see
An article entitled, “What Do Blind People Actually See?”
Excerpt:
"What does a blind person see? (It seems that blind people get asked this all the time.) Your first guess might be that she sees a vast blackness.
But imagine telling a goose (who doesn’t know much about humans) that you can’t sense Earth’s magnetic field. The bird, baffled, asks, ‘So, what do you sense when you change the direction you’re facing??’
The answer, of course, is nothing. Just as blind people do not sense the color black, we do not sense anything at all in place of our lack of sensations for magnetic fields or ultraviolet light. We don’t know what we’re missing.
To try to understand what it might be like to be blind, think about how it “looks” behind your head. When you look at the scene in front of you, it has a boundary. Your visual field extends to each side only so far. If you spread your arms, and draw your hands back until they are no longer visible, what color is the space that your hands occupy? This space does not look black. It does not look white. It just isn’t."
I’m still far removed from understanding it though. “It just isn’t”? How does someone actually experience that?
Yes, since music is one of the most profound ways in which to express yourself in regard to “being in the world”, it doesn’t surprise me at all that those who experience the world in a way that is apart from others, would be compelled to create music – sounds – that intimately resonate in encompassing how they experience the world around them. I wonder if someone who is blind has ever attempted to capture that world in music. And then I can’t help but wonder what it might then be like to be a Pagan…and be deaf from birth.
Chants would seem to be the musical equivalent of ritual behaviors. Words are intoned in such a way as to make them a necessary repetitive realty. Something I am no longer able to experience myself…but am able to understand why they would be so appealing to others who are. Old or young.
To me it conveys all of the profound mystery that intertwines us in nature. Most of course go about the business of living their lives from day to day without pondering such things at all. Nature is “out there” somewhere and it only vaguely seems relevant to the tasks at hand. Instead, most leave all that “spiritual stuff” to God. Me, I’m still no less fractured and fragmented, but I can never really stop wondering if there might someday be a way back into life…teleologically?
How did you and your Pagan friends react to the pandemic? Deadly viruses are an inherent part of nature as well. How is nature embedded in things like “natural disasters” – nature that can make human existence a sheer misery – understood by those in your community.
Also, how do those in your family react to you being a Pagan?
With friends over the years, I was always more than willing to explore our different worlds…and the manner in which we understood these worlds differently. In fact I was ever and always curious about those who were not like me.
But with more intimate relationships – with lovers – I was never really able to get much beyond this actual need for them to share my passions. In particular, a love of music and a love of philosophy. But, aside from Supannika, I was just never able to find a partner that “measured up”. Even with my wife, the gaps were, at times, excruciating.
Dog’s breakfast? Had to look that one up: "‘dog’s breakfast,’ is British slang for ‘a complete mess’
I suppose there are some things one is actually better off never having to see.
Telly! That’s another one!! Here, of course, it’s the rather drab television or TV.
Yes, another interesting article, that tries to explain what it’s like to be blind in a way that a sighted person might understand. But apparently, ultimately can’t. I don’t have a visual sense so obviously don’t see black or, indeed, anything else at all. It just isn’t there. The lack of a common frame of reference means that it’s impossible to describe what this is actually like, but that doesn’t mean we can’t try. It also, incidentally, proves just how dominant sight is to most people, to the extent that, very literally, they simply can’t imagine what it’s like to have never had it.
So, for example, when it says:
+++Blind people might not have perceptually driven visual imagery, but they use their other senses to encode spatial relationships (pdf). For example, suppose you take off your high heels under the table at a restaurant. When it’s time to get up, you might feel around with your feet for them, right them, and put them on, all without use of your eyes. You are able to do this because you are encoding spatial information with your haptic system, or sense of touch. The blind, too, use their other senses, such as hearing and touch, to form representations of the world.+++
That’s absolutely right. I can imagine any spatial relationship or object in great detail, but it has no visual element to it. Your brain is somehow tricking you into believing that a visual element is essential in all imaginings of this nature, simply because sight is so overwhelmingly dominant for you. Which there are very good evolutionary reasons for, of course. When you see, apparently something like half your brain (or even more, according to some) is used for processing visual information, in one way or another, so it’s not surprising that vision is so dominant. Well, my brain is most certainly not being idle. It is using that processing power for processing other sources of information.
And so, circling back to your fictional machine for getting inside someone else’s mind, I have to say, perhaps sadly, that I don’t believe such a thing is actually possible, at least not in the literal sense that’s intended.
Many blind people do indeed express themselves in music. As for being a Pagan, I can describe that to you at great length! I have almost nothing I can usefully say on deafness, though, other than what I’ve gathered about the deaf community, which seems even more politicised than the blind one.
It’s interesting that that particular chant grabbed you, as it’s a very simple one, which are almost always the best. Chants have many functions in a Pagan context. At the most mundane level, it’s good to have a nice sing-along. Moving up a notch, a chant provides group cohesion and identity. But at its most powerful level, a specific chant, in a ritual context, helps to invoke the forces of nature.
The pandemic is clearly nature’s way of hitting back at humanity’s constant attacks on it. If we choose to destroy the earth, rob its resources, live in overcrowded, insanitary cities, and all the rest, the result is inevitable. Pagans have reacted in many different ways. Many have organised healing rituals, for example. We need to live in harmony with nature, not exploit it, and there needs to be a complete change in society before we can do this.
And the same is true for any other natural disaster. Whenever I hear news reports of a volcano erupting in Iceland, I always think of it as the gods being angry and hurling rocks at us. Perhaps not quite literally, but pretty close to it.
My family are happy with me being a Pagan, and indeed, are sympathetic towards it. There was no point at which I had to “come out” as a Pagan to them, and incur their wrath or displeasure. I first began looking into it in a serious way when I was at school, but it had always been with me, even when I couldn’t put a name to it. And, in case you were wondering, my blindness has certainly been a factor in this, I would say, as it has allowed me to experience nature in ways that most people don’t. This is obviously not the case for most Pagans, though.
I agree that shared passions are essential in any intimate relationship. In particular, I can’t imagine being in such a relationship with anyone who didn’t share my love of nature.
I think you’re right. The gap between these two worlds can never be entirely bridged. As much as I try to imagine the descriptions of those who were blind from birth in explaining what they experience, there are just more gaps in turn between words and worlds. Human language has its limitations. And this is an example of one of them it seems. Though, sure, I would always appreciate any attempt on your part to try to make the gap a little narrower.
And then it would seem [to me] it will always come down to how well you are able to do this. Through education, through experiences, through trial and error. The point being to do it well enough so that you don’t need to think, “if only I could see”. You don’t need to see in order to live your life with as much fulfilment and satisfaction and independence and confidence as those who can see. It’s just that particular sighted people can’t help but wonder about all the times if, blind themselves, they might be confused or uncertain or even frightened not to be able to see. They might imagine instances where others might take advantage of them, or trick them, or mislead them for their own selfish gain.
Yes, that sort of thing is more in the way of a thought experiment now. In other words, what if there was such a machine…would you use it? And yet with each new mind-boggling invention, technological device and medical breakthrough, who really knows what might be possible down the road in regard to blindness.
Yes, politics is always going to be tricky. And that’s because we live in communities where different people come to different conclusions about the right and the wrong way to do things. In sighted, blind and deaf communities. Then back to those able to force others to do things their way simply because they have the power to enforce their own perceived best interests; those able to all agree on the right things to do; those who accept that there are political conflicts and agree to choose moderation, negotiation and compromise as the best of all possible worlds. That’s why communities of like minded people come into existence. A place where there is a minimal of contention…of politics.
Something along the lines of this song, perhaps: Spirit “Nature’s Way” youtu.be/0V0Vu_utUZY
Unfortunately, nature and the gods do not inflict the retribution just on those who ravage the Earth. But on all of us, one way or another. To me it always goes back to a universe that does not seem rooted in either good or bad…but in the brute facticity of “the way things just are”.
And I no longer have access to the communities I was once able to feel a part of. But it’s nice to know that others still do. And if they do then, who knows, perhaps one day I might again as well.
Yes, you are very fortunate in this regard. Think of all the families that have been ripped asunder because in “coming out” – and in regard to many different things – the parents simply refused to tolerate the choices that their children made. Or the families [like mine] in which there was almost no bond at all. Parents who were not interested enough in their kids to care one way or another what they did.
I’m really happy for you in this regard.
Just wondering: do you want to have children of your own someday?
“But more recent research suggests people who are blind, from birth or otherwise, can still experience visual images in their dreams.”
“People with congenital blindness may also be more likely to experience dreams through taste, smell, sound, and touch, according to a 2014 study. Those who became blind later in life appeared to have more tactile (touch) sensations in their dreams.”
“It can also be difficult for blind people to accurately convey how they experience their dreams, especially if they have little to no experience of sight. But overall, the content of a blind person’s dreams is likely the same as yours. They just experience their dreams a bit differently.”
"The bottom line
Everyone dreams, even if they don’t remember it, and blind people are no exception. Several studies have explored how blind people dream. The findings are helpful, but they definitely have some limits."
Navigating the world, and understanding spatial relationships and objects, is just something that comes naturally, and I almost never have moments when I suddenly think to myself, if only I could see. We were also taught extra techniques at school. As for being tricked or taken advantage of, I think sighted people are just as likely to fall victim to that as anyone else.
If such a machine existed I would certainly use it, to find out what seeing is like. To say that I’ve had a lifetime of curiosity about it would be something of an understatement! But please don’t confuse curiosity, however intense, with a feeling that my life is somehow defective, because I don’t feel that at all.
The first article you linked appears to be behind a paywall.
It’s certainly true that nature’s retribution is indiscriminate, but then, why should it be otherwise? We are in no position to impose our own morality on nature, and trying to impose things on nature is exactly why we are in this mess anyway. Nature is just what it is. We can either go with the flow, or try, with dire consequences, to paddle against the tide. The ancients understood this perfectly well, and their gods reflected this. It is only with the rise of monotheistic religions, with their supposed all-powerful deities, that we seem to have forgotten this, and become dislocated from nature. The result is a million competing versions of worship of the “one true god” all perfectly willing to slaughter those with slightly different viewpoints, and trash the earth in the process. And also, it has to be said, these monotheistic religions are entirely patriarchal, with a male god and a male priesthood. Quite often, women are treated appallingly, and certainly never with equality. The ancient Pagan religions were very different, and the earlier you go in history, the more likely it is that women were in charge of the spiritual aspect of life. Even the Romans, that most militaristic of all ancient societies, had a female priestesshood with great power and influence, namely, the Vestal Virgins.
Sorry to hear that you were not close to your family. Would you like to tell me more? I’ve been very blessed and lucky in my life, and having a close, supportive family is definitely one of the things I feel grateful for. And yes, I’ve always wanted children of my own, to love and cherish.
And that’s another interesting article.
+++Research suggests blind people who lose their sight before the age of 5 usually don’t see images in their dreams.+++
Yes, and this is even more the case for those who have never had any sight at all. Which is, of course, pretty obvious when you think about it. How can your mind conjure up visual images in a dream, if it’s never experienced any in waking life? What could those images possibly consist of? True, as has been pointed out, I wouldn’t even recognise a visual image if I “saw” one. But I know what my dreams consist of, and they definitely don’t include a whole extra dimension that I don’t recognise from my daily life.
The other more technical article suggests that people who are born blind have visual imagery in their dreams, and can even draw a picture of this imagery afterwards. Well, let’s go through this, shall we, because, believe me, it’s a subject I’ve thought about a lot, over the years. What they’re actually measuring, to start with, is brain activity. It’s no surprise that blind people have brain activity that is very similar to what sighted people have when they are processing vision, because their brain is using this processing power to process other sources of information, as I said before. In particular, just as with vision, they are processing spatial information, which in their case is derived from all the other senses, including echo-location. It’s also no surprise that the blind people they tested could even draw this afterwards (though no doubt in a pretty rudimentary sort of way), something I’ve never tried myself, but why not? In other words, blind people are using the same areas of the brain as sighted people do to produce 3D representations of the world around them. But is this, actually, vision? Does my 3D map of my surroundings in my mind look like your visual (3D) map of your surroundings in yours, albeit without colour or shading? I don’t know the answer to that.
+++Blind people have nightmares just like sighted people do. In fact, some research suggests they may have nightmares more frequently than sighted people. This is especially true for people who are born blind.+++
Very interesting, because this is not my experience. I almost never have what I would call a nightmare. Everyone is different though.
+++Your best bet is to go straight to the source and talk to someone in the blind community. If you approach them politely and from a place of genuine interest, they’ll likely be happy to offer their insight.+++
Couldn’t have put it better myself!
Can you describe the woman in the photo? I’d be interested to know why you think she looks similar to me.
Here’s some contemporary Pagan music, from the German folk band Faun. The song is called Walpurgisnacht, which is a name for the festival that occurs in late April or early May, depending on the specific tradition (it also has many other names).
We’ll just have to accept that each and every one of us, blind or sighted, is going to have to work this out in our own way so as to achieve the most rewarding life. I can only imagine my own worries in being in situations where I was not able to see what others were doing around me. I think: How could I not feel a sense of uncertainty. Unless, ironically enough, I was able to create the world that I live in now: a place for everything and everything in its place. And much the same for everyone.
I understand that. In fact, not many people I’ve been around appeared more comfortable in their own skin than you seem to be in yours. Also, let’s face it, there are any number of things that sighted people see that, well, they wish they had not seen. The world is filled with beauty true, but it is also filled with other considerably less appealing things. That’s why some will speak of things “you can’t unsee”.
Here of course we can only come to our own individual conclusions about things such as this. But to the extent that one’s spiritual path takes them away from Inquisitions, Crusades, Witch Hunts, Infidels, Fatwas and all of the other beliefs in which a God, the God, my God is “up there” ready to send you to Hell if you don’t think and feel and say and do what He commands of you, well, that is definitely going in the right direction as far as I am concerned.
I no longer have access to a belief such as this myself but I will always respect those who have found one. Provided they are tolerant of those with other beliefs and try above all to bring about as few trials and tribulations for others not sharing their own beliefs as possible.
I will tell you more if, some day, I am ever able to actually come to understand it myself. It’s never been clear in my own mind as to whether the strife was as a result of the way they were or the way that I was. I’ve always been different from most people I have been around, but I’ve always had a difficult time as well communicating to them what that means. My family was very conservative and I have never been that.
On the other hand, being different has always been something that I took pride in because it was always derived from a deep introspection. I wasn’t different by chance, but by choice. I thought and felt what I did after much reflection. And in a world that was bursting at the seams with many different experiences. And that’s always important in my view because you need to have your beliefs challenged from time to time.
Of course the first thing that will pop into the head of some in regard to blind parents is wondering what it might be like to raise a child without the capacity to see. In fact when I Googled that I found this: blindparents.uk/
So, if you ever do become a Mom – Mum? – there are those there able to come to your assistance if you need it.
Or the part that was raised in Children of a Lesser God when Sarah was asked whether, if she were to become a mom, she would want the child to be deaf or able to hear.
Wow. What I wouldn’t give for that machine now. Both of us hooked up to it. Me having your dreams, you having mine. To actually dream as the other does. To actually understand what that experience is like.
Of course the more technical you get in explaining these things the less those like me are able to understand it fully. You would have to have the education and the experience in exploring the biological and medical interactions in the brains of the blind and the sighted to understand, in turn, the parts that are the same and the parts that are different. And, in fact, you seem to be far more sophisticated in comprehending it than I am.
I suppose it is difficult however to pin down the meaning of a nightmare. Or even a “bad dream”. Do you have dreams that disturb you? Or dreams that make you think about your life in a different way?
Well, it is a photograph of her only from the chest up. The shape of her face is similar to yours. She has long hair that appears [to me] to be much like your own. She is wearing sunglasses so I cannot see her eyes, but I can’t see your eyes either in your photo here. She appears to be about your age and she is what I think most of us would call “pretty”.
I think I would have to see a picture of you from the chest up wearing sunglasses in order to pin down just how close the resemblance is. Or, wow, what if it turned out to be you!
This music reminds me of the songs of Loreena McKennitt:
Thank you for saying that I seem comfortable in my own skin. Yep, I’ve definitely heard the phrase, things you can’t unsee. How about, things you can’t unsmell? Is that even a word?
Yes, I’m always tolerant of other beliefs, because there is no one single true way to the divine. The one thing I’m not tolerant of, though, is intolerance, which might sounds like a bit of a contradiction, but that’s the way it has to be, I suppose. I wouldn’t even describe Paganism as a belief though, to be honest. It’s more of an attitude, a way of approaching the world. True, there are specific traditions within Paganism that could be described as belief systems, but there are lots of them, many contradicting each other, and Pagans are perfectly happy with that, and many don’t belong to any specific tradition, or indeed, belong to more than one at the same time.
Being different is definitely a good thing, in my opinion.
Thanks for the link to Blind Parents UK. It may indeed be a useful resource for me some day. As for whether it’s “mom” or “mum” well, down south, including in London, they say “mum”. Up north, think of Manchester for example, they say “mam”. In the Midlands, however, where I’m from, we say “mom”. On the question of whether I’d want my children to be sighted, the answer is yes, of course I would. My blindness is not a hereditary condition anyway so the issue is not likely to arise, since any future partner of mine will undoubtedly be sighted. I do, however, know quite a few blind couples with kids, so it’s not as big a challenge as you might think.
With regard to nightmares, I do sometimes have dreams, such as in the one I described before, where I’m trying to find something or someone, and not being able to. The emotion of the dream reflects this. But I would not describe these as nightmares, as no actual fear is involved. More a sense of loss or frustration, of something being forever out of my grasp. Make of that what you will, but I think the symbolism is pretty clear there, given that I’m blind. I certainly don’t fear those dreams though, and just like all dreams, I like them for their emotional intensity. So I suppose that if dreams make me think about life in a different way, it’s to always value the importance of emotion.
If that photo is of me, I’d very much like to know where they got it! I’m sure it isn’t, though. For a start off, I don’t wear sunglasses. The main reason that some blind people wear sunglasses is that they have some light perception, and are protecting their eyes from bright lights, such as the sun. That doesn’t apply to me, though.
Probably the most famous Pagan song that went mainstream is Hymn to Her by the Pretenders.
The giveaway is the part in the lyrics where it says “the maid and the mother and the crone that’s grown old” because the maid, mother and crone are the three aspects of the goddess, specifically in Wiccan tradition, but similar ideas exist in other Pagan traditions too. The song is basically exactly what it says in the title, a hymn to the goddess.
Well, if it’s not a word let’s make it one here, okay?
Again, so much seems to come back to the important difference between being born without the capacity to see or hear or smell or taste and having once had these capabilities and then lost them. I’ve read for example that for some afflicted with the covid virus, they have lost their ability to taste the food they are eating. There are just so many different situations that each of us as individuals might find themselves in.
That’s often the thing about language here. Sometimes what we come to believe in our head is true is hard to capture in words. If not resulting in contradictions then in ambiguity and uncertainty and equivocation. The word “divine” for example. Some seem to have a crystal clear understanding of it, others only in leaps of faith, while others have no understanding of it at all. Which is why, from my frame of mind, tolerance is so important. Once someone comes to conclude that only their own understanding of it counts? Well, as they say, the rest is history.
Yes, I think that is a really, really good way to put it. And it would seem to make the experience of being a Pagan broad enough to necessitate tolerance of others who share some things with you but not all things. It is something that I once felt [more or less] when I was a member of the Unitarian Church. Probably the most tolerant community that I had ever been in.
For me it was mother. Except on those rare occasions when it was mom. But how to explain the difference? Again, even I couldn’t tell you that. And I was there.
Yes, as I recall, that is what Sarah said in the film in regard to the possibility of her becoming a mother. She would want her baby to hear. I wonder though of the arguments of those who would go in the other direction. Is that the wrong way to think? And here I am ever and always back to my own “disability”: feeling “fractured and fragmented” in a world where almost everyone else is not. This can actually be just as disorienting as any physical condition.
Well, if perhaps someday you do become a mother, please take me along on what, in having become a father myself, is quite simply the most complex experience I have ever had. They say that having children changes everything. Trust me: they are right.
Yes, perhaps that is vision itself. Anyway, if you have any “breakthroughs” from dreams down the road, let me know. Likewise, if I have a dream that blows my mind in giving me fresh insights into my own surreal existence, I’ll let you know.
Okay, let’s both agree that the woman in the photograph is almost certainly not you. At least for now.
"Kid what changed your mood
You’ve gone all sad so I feel sad too
I think I know some things we never outgrow
You think it’s wrong
I can tell you do
How can I explain
When you don’t want me to
Kid my only kid
You look so small you’ve gone so quiet
I know you know what I’m about
I won’t deny it
But you forgive though you don’t understand
You’ve turned your head
You’ve dropped my hand
All my sorrow, all my blues
All my sorrow
Shut the light, go away
Full of grace, you cover your face
Kid gracious kid
Your eyes are blue but you won’t cry
I know angry tears are too dear
You won’t let them go"
I went through my own rendition of this with Jessica. For me it all revolves around that time in a parent’s life when their child begins to interact with his or her “peers”. Suddenly, your relationship is challenged by “friends” who can take your own child’s frame of mind in who knows how many different directions.
It would be like you becoming a Mom. You tell your children about the world around them as you understand it. And, in being children, they will see you more or less as the world around them. But as they grow older and go out into the world as teenagers, they meet others who see the world differently. Especially in this day and age where, on the internet alone, kids are exposed to god knows what online.
I always encouraged my daughter to think for herself. To find her own way. And she did. And, then, as it turned out, her own way is now a very different way from mine.