Lately, there has been an advertisement on the front page of ILP having something to do with oncology. Is this because we use the word “ontology” a lot? Is that how GoogleAds works? Fuzzy logic, or at least fuzzy spelling?
Should we start using the word “corn” a lot? Or “pork” or “pawn” (that last might just be my New England accent)?
You know - to get some more interesting ads.
Maybe this should be in Help & Suggestions.
I dunno.
Faust, it’s possible Ben may be doing the best he can with advertising.
I was making a joke. I’m not complaining about the ads.
I believe your genius is under-appreciated.
So, how goes the relationship. Dish.
Aw, let’s face it, this was weak material. The audience is the judge. I bombed.
The relationship is good. The GF recently agreed to some adventures in bondage and discipline - blindfolds seem to be first on the list. Which is all good news. We’re discussing some technical issues in that regard (no headboard, for instance). I think my father still has a four-poster around the house, so that might be easily solved.
I’m probably moving in soon.
It wasn’t just the bondage that decided it, just for the record.
Hey, what else is there?
I jest.
What are you trying to say about the audience?
Anyway, it’s good to see you have such a supportive father.
To what lengths would a father go to secure a grandkid, I wonder (‘Son, if you need a hand, I can hold down a leg or two’ … of course while you guys are being strapped in, not during the actual event. Come on, faust, I doubt I am that depraved). I hope this image hasn’t destroyed future encounters with your GF.
Come to think of it, what did your father use that four-poster for? I hope you are taking some tips from this man.
Oh, and don’t forget to clean that four-poster. Just being a friend. And friends look out for each other.
Wait a minute, does she read the boards? And by boards, I mean the forum, not the bang your brains out kind. If she could read during the latter, then it’s possible you are not doing your job well. I stop … for now.
Sang, you kill me man! What’s up with you lately?
Sandy - she does not read the boards, She has much better things to do.
A bed is a bed. Just an object. Many people have slept in it, and done god knows what in it. It’s an old bed. But, in the end, just a bed.
By the way, my father does think she’s a hottie. And she is.
Faust, you bring hope to all us ILP singletons, in snagging a hottie! 
Mags, the best thing about it is that I can take no real responsibility for this - it appears to have been accidental. There is nothing about me that should attract someone like this woman. Keeping her is another matter - she appears to appreciate things like respect for her intelligence, common courtesies, the willingness to listen to her point of view, a mutual unwillingness to play stupid control games - and a bunch of other unsexy stuff.
But the intial snagging, I cannot take any credit for.
Evidently, it can happen to anyone.
faust,
So, she doesn’t read the boards? You Dog!
Would you consider hanging on for dear life as better things to do? If so, then Very Niiiice.
Sorry, I was have a Schopenhauerian moment there. I will move on to more serious ontological problems involving, The Bed.
A bed in the right (or wrong) hands, depending on how you look at it, can transcend beddom into an entirely different realm. I’ll now go wash my mouth out, before we get started metaphors and their epistemological implications.
I’m glad your dad thinks she’s a hottie. Keep an eye on your dad. Unless you guys are cool like that. Okay, okay, moving on… Does he get his chicks for free? Yes, moving on…
Time to cure you of your modesty:
Take no responsibility for this? Hello, ‘magic series,’ remember? Accidental my, um, bed sore. Did you whip out all four? And by whip out, I mean numbers from the series. Saying that there’s nothing about you that should attract someone like her either says something about her, or makes you very suspect. And since we all know about your mastery of alchemy, I’ll go for suspect. So, no, don’t go spreading falsities that it can happen to anyone. The ‘audience’ might actually act on these false hopes. But hey, any way you can get it, hope is hope.
All this to say, I really congratulate you on your happiness.
I do remember something about a magic series. If it was something I said, it was probably a lie, though.