…and control negative feedback?
If I am trying to take a behavioural approach to getting better at interacting with women how do I control negative feedback, ie to stop becoming bitter and losing motivation?
Because i get so much negative feedback- rejection; I just lose motivation and become resentful. This Ive foudn to produce a strong native feedback loop making me less and less apt to approach more women in future.
In the behavioural model getting a good reaction would be a reinforcer but that isnt within my control is it- thus it becomes like the gambler who keeps on and on playing the slots getting frustrated and he loses more and more.
So I should somehow ‘reward’ myself rather than the reward being contingent on external factors right? Feels like a lightbulb went off as I wrote that as thinking about it I think that’s what I’ve been missing and seems rto accord with skinner’s thesis.
Say if i approach a certain amount of women and then whatever happens, treat myself with something after?
also any further reading on this would be welcome. ive looked around for skinner’s work in the past but didnt find any reading which seemed accessible.