Hi ILP,
I’ve never read philosophy texts, or considered myself a philosopher. I have, however, taken the approach of the philosopher in the way I absorb and assess information.
I have recently began a pursuit to find cohesiveness in my thoughts. To produce a single structure where all observations and conclusions I’ve drawn interrelate so I can understand my philosophy as it were, and how I can move and grow in life ‘authentically’ in accordance with my beliefs.
I closely relate to Existentialism. Mainly that there is no objective meaning or purpose, therefore we can choose our own. Now this is where things get tricky. I’ve thought about who I am as a person, and what I value in life… what I could try to achieve. The problem is, I can’t find anything with enough integrity to pursue. Nothing that has enough value to justify the endurance of life and all it’s suffering, ignorance and general discomfort.
People are defined by their experiences. Their values and identity are shaped by their experiences. Every question our brain asks, is only relevant because we’ve chosen it. All choices lead back to the same cause. Our identity. This is a completely subjective act. Of what relevance is all the questions we ask? At the core, it would seem, we’re all seeking meaning and understanding of ourselves and our place in the universe.
The truth is, we don’t need to look beyond ourselves to find our place and our meaning. I believe our pursuit of (irrelevant) ‘knowledge’ is really just our will to deny the ultimate truth. What could we possibly find that would be of significance? We know our place. We are here because we’re capable of being here. There is no intent for our existence. There is no intent. We’re mutations that are efficient at surviving.
When we’re young, we live in the moment. When we’re adults, we acquire our trinkets, theories and values. When we’re old, we put it all to rest and embrace the end. Life is but an experience, the senses, emotions and journey. The only thing that keeps us alive is our will to live and fear of death. This has just evolved due to natural selection and has no more integrity than the will to die.
Given all this, if I say I don’t enjoy the process of life. That I am uncomfortableI is it reasonable for me to choose death? Is there something more to life that I’m missing? I just want some closure and wonder whether it exists in the world of philosophy.
Thanks for reading and I hope you can spare the time to share your thoughts.